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Original poster

To be miffed at "Gift list for mother of the baby" enclosed in *Baby naming ceremony* invitation?

992 replies

doubleshotespresso · 12/06/2013 23:38

So some close friends (who married in church), but now claim to be atheist are holding a naming ceremony for their 8 month old first baby in an hotel.....

The invitation is beautiful with a map, timings "event closes at 11pm"?

The gift list ranges from £30-to £300, all items for the mother, cosmetics, trinkets, jewellery, pampering breaks, personalised hand-bound stationery and photo albums...

Anybody know the drill for these naming ceremonies? Are we supposed to guess a gift for the baby? Or just congratulate the mother for deciding on a name?

I have read this a dozen times and am staggered beyond belief-DP read it and fell into hysterics....

My gut tells me to go along with Jo Malone scented nappies or something.

Somebody please tell me this is not normal?!?!?!

OP posts:
Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 13/06/2013 00:28

My Mum just suggested John Lewis vouchers if we do go, as she was incandescent when I explained all this on the phone!

OP posts:
Gossipmonster · 13/06/2013 00:27

Is it Coleen Rooney?

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 13/06/2013 00:26

These responses are exactly what I had hoped for thank-you all!

No mention of gifts for the father no....

I had actually already purchased a little gift for the baby just because it caught my eye and I knew this was due.... But thinking a silver bangle engraved with Twinkle twinkle little star and lovely Beatrix Potter "my first library" set with it's own nursery shelf perhaps won't cut it now....

We have just realised that the gift list has considerable price gaps. Nothing listed costing between £38.99 and £75! Yikes

OP posts:
MalenkyRusskyDrakonchik · 13/06/2013 00:14

Would you not be tempted to ring them and tell them that someone's OTT wedding list must've fallen into your envelope?!

Obviously you won't, but, wow ...

MidniteScribbler · 13/06/2013 00:13

I would just buy something for the baby as is traditional. Gift lists are a suggestion, not a demand.

PunkHedgehog · 13/06/2013 00:13

If you know them that well can you ring them up and say 'v funny joke, we thought it was hilarious, but aren't you worried that some people will be offended?'. Or just tell them straight out they are being daft.

Failing that do, or don't go, but ignore the list. If they've been generous to your kids over the years then it's reasonable to return the favour, but with mothercare vouchers, a donation to a child trust fund, a set of nicely bound Pooh Bear books, or something along those lines.

OutragedFromLeeds · 13/06/2013 00:12

I'd go, but completely ignore the gift list. Bloody cheek. Could it be some sort of post-natal madness? Really extreme PFBitis?

Scruffey · 13/06/2013 00:12

In that case, give them a free pass for this one piece of bad behaviour, take a photo album and continue the friendship. Reconsider if such things continue!

LazyMonkeyButler · 13/06/2013 00:11

Actually scruffey yes, I would expect the couple to be receiving a lot of photo albums (as it would appear to be the only appropriate gift on the list).

WhiteBirdBlueSky · 13/06/2013 00:09

She's been very bad mannered, but if she's been v generous to your DSCs then I would just suck it up so as not to appear just as rude. Or ignore and take a gift for the baby.

megsmouse · 13/06/2013 00:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LazyMonkeyButler · 13/06/2013 00:08

How rude and grabby can you be? Shock

I would go though, just to see the look on the parents' faces when you hand over your silver cutlery set (as is more normal at these events) Grin.

Out of interest, is there anything for the father on the gift list? A set of golf clubs perhaps? I am truly intrigued as to why the mother thinks it is reasonable to ask for expensive gifts to celebrate her naming her baby.

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 13/06/2013 00:05

scruffey we have shared holidays, kids parties, house moves, seriously years..... They have never ever before demonstrated such grabby,crass and frankly rude traits...

DP just made the observation (&pls forgive his snobbery!) that they are lovely people, but they do not really know what they are doing when it comes to these things..... Not really convinced of this, their wedding was immaculate, though they (she I suppose) had a very expensive wedding planner. It was classy,beautiful and a very fun day, with no pretentious touches.

We are baffled!

OP posts:
LittleTyga · 13/06/2013 00:04

Send it back and demand a poem - tell her you couldn't possibly take this seriously without a tacky poem - really some people!

hortensemancini · 13/06/2013 00:03

So, effectively, they're having the baby christened in the Church of St John and St Lewis, rather than the usual Church of England? Class!

Scruffey · 13/06/2013 00:01

If you want to continue the friendship, I think a photo album from their list is the best thing to go with. Other stuff sounds grabby, photo album is reasonable. It does sound shocking and Yanbu to be miffed!

If you don't value or wish to continue with the friendship, you could just decline the invite.

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 13/06/2013 00:01

Ok so we have not over-reacted-was just checking! Thanks for the reassurance and cerealqueen that is so funny.

Our problem is that the father of the baby frequently does contracting work on projects with DP. If we do not attend I think we would be very much offending them. They have been very generous to my stepchildren over the years, Birthdays etc....

But I have to say it would be through gritted teeth if we did go which goes against our principles too....

Am going to sleep on it....Confused

OP posts:
ChasedByBees · 13/06/2013 00:01

Hilarious! Grin

IAgreeCompletely · 12/06/2013 23:59

Oh, my Hmm face was that I thought the grabby friends were weird NOT the OP

Blush
Xiaoxiong · 12/06/2013 23:59

Not normal. And before anyone weighs in with something about imported Americanisms, it wouldn't be normal in the States either (at least not the various parts in which my family live).

IAgreeCompletely · 12/06/2013 23:57

Are you sure it is not a joke?

Do they have form for this? What was their wedding like?

Really, really wierd Hmm

UnrequitedSkink · 12/06/2013 23:57

Wow. Just...wow.

I've never even heard of a gift list being included in a Christening invitation...presumably gifts have been given for the benefit of the new arrival already? Did they have a gift list for that too?

RikeBider · 12/06/2013 23:56

Crazy! We had naming ceremonies for our boys, in a community centre, and maybe half the guests gave presents - books, money boxes, money, clothes. Most gave a card. We didn't ask for or expect presents for the baby let alone me!

vintagecakeisstillnice · 12/06/2013 23:55

But don't you realise she is the first woman ever ever to have created life and so must be worshiped.

Hmm
cerealqueen · 12/06/2013 23:55

She's given birth to Jesus and intends to milk it.

Taking the piss. Yep, so grabby, they would literally take it.

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