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Original poster

To be miffed at "Gift list for mother of the baby" enclosed in *Baby naming ceremony* invitation?

992 replies

doubleshotespresso · 12/06/2013 23:38

So some close friends (who married in church), but now claim to be atheist are holding a naming ceremony for their 8 month old first baby in an hotel.....

The invitation is beautiful with a map, timings "event closes at 11pm"?

The gift list ranges from £30-to £300, all items for the mother, cosmetics, trinkets, jewellery, pampering breaks, personalised hand-bound stationery and photo albums...

Anybody know the drill for these naming ceremonies? Are we supposed to guess a gift for the baby? Or just congratulate the mother for deciding on a name?

I have read this a dozen times and am staggered beyond belief-DP read it and fell into hysterics....

My gut tells me to go along with Jo Malone scented nappies or something.

Somebody please tell me this is not normal?!?!?!

OP posts:
Snazzywaitingforsummer · 17/06/2013 12:12

CSIDanner That sounds pretty likely to me...

amazingmumof6 · 17/06/2013 11:27

Pancake yep, in Father of the Bride!

WaitingForPancakeDay · 17/06/2013 11:24

I am so pleased its worked out with you and your friend.

Is the event planner called Frank (pronounced Fronk) and featured in a film with Steve Martin and Diane Keaton?!

CSIJanner · 17/06/2013 11:06

The sister works in media - what's to bet that she was going to use her sisters naming ceremony as a client testimonial for her portfolio?

pigletmania · 17/06/2013 10:52

The sister sounds like a fecking nightmare, looks like she needs someone to keep her in check. It's nothing to do with her, it's not her babies among ceremony. When it's her turn she can have te day se wants not hijack her sisters day. Put her and Elton John wedding planner on an island together and leave them there

Snazzywaitingforsummer · 17/06/2013 09:53

Hey OP, so glad this had turned out well! I was the poster who had had a comparable situation go badly wrong with a friend. Very relieved yours has gone better as I wouldn't wish my experience on anyone - but it seems that your friend is a decent person who was misguided but willing to see it and sort it out. (By the way I know people in Australia who love entertaining and they would have no truck with this approach - I think the notion that it's a 'growing trend' is wishful thinking on the sister's part - they've probably persuaded one person to do it and are now saying it's a 'trend' Hmm ) Sounds like now it will be a lovely relaxed day.

On the 'deleting thread' point, my suggestion would be to ask for it to be moved to Chat. That way you could still update on how the rest of the re-organising goes, if you want, and the event itself, but the thread will go 90 days after the last post so it will die a natural death, as it were.

MumnGran · 17/06/2013 09:48

How is it going this morning double? getting back to normal for you, I hope!
What a marathon

foslady · 17/06/2013 09:46

Wasn't going to post anymore, but seriously, her sister has not responded well???? Sister needs to butt out! You are a fab friend. If I remember right and this sister has 'recommended' him, do you think she's worried about 'losing face',............or a discount on something he's doing for her.........???
And everything you are doing for her and the baby right now letting her sleep and getting back to being the person you knew -double bouquet and a bottle of champers to you!
I know you said that you were going to get this deleted, but please make sure we hear what a great day this family have at babies naming ceremony, it sounds like you are all going the extra mile to make sure is an extra special day for all the right reasons

Thumbwitch · 17/06/2013 03:54

"her sister has not responded well..." well too fucking bad! She can have it the way she wants it when it's HER naming ceremony/whatever - and see how far she gets with a wishlist like that! I get the impression that the sister is rather too mememe about it all for comfort, still at least your friend's DH is doing the best for his wife, regardless.

MumnGran · 17/06/2013 00:55

...... and a double bouquet !!
Flowers Flowers

amazingmumof6 · 17/06/2013 00:48

I think you deserve a good night's sleep!

well done!

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 17/06/2013 00:45

Hello ithas been an epic day.

Yes, friends' DH called Australia, her sister has not responded well to the changes but will still be attending.....

Baby is very grouchy so need to keep this short for now.... Will update fully tomorrow , fortunately I am working from home tomorrow..... So get some extra sleep tonight thank goodness. I think we will be spending the day here just calming down, her DH was very good, he accepts that the situation was awful for her and has laughed with us all today and thanked us profusely too....

Will be back with more tomorrow......

OP posts:
BlackeyedSusan · 16/06/2013 17:47

coming back late for the updates. what a relief.

pigletmania · 16/06/2013 17:37

The sister will have to lie it or lump it, it's not her day. She sounds like a bit of a celebrationzilla tbh Grin. Glad your friend as you to help her take control of the situation. You now need to help your friend become more assertive with her sister

AndHarry · 16/06/2013 16:45

Hopefully the sister will be horrified to hear what has been happening and mortified that she suggested him.

LittleBearPad · 16/06/2013 16:42

Double thank goodness you did raise it with her. I'm so pleased people have been nice when they've replied to the notes and calls.

SpringtimeForHitler · 16/06/2013 16:08

I agree, DH should handle the sister I think.

You are lovely OP, she is very lucky to have a friend like you.
Brew Biscuit

MumnGran · 16/06/2013 15:50

I am one for being honest and broaching things directly (as discussed earlier!) but given your friends mental state, I think I would be suggesting that her DH handles talking to the sister .... probably with a call to tell her he has fired the planner, before the planner gets in first!!

If the sister cares, then one would hope she will put her siblings emotional state a long way ahead of any working relationship she may have with a paid planner. actually, I would hope she is as horrified as everyone else.

amazingmumof6 · 16/06/2013 15:33

here's some tea for you

Brew Brew Brew

and a snack

Bear Bear Bear

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 16/06/2013 15:27

Am battered mentally but strangely awake, feeling better the more control we gain of the situation. We still did not hear back from Elton John the planner..... Cannot wait to get him out of the picture so my friend can actually look forward to the day.

Sister is due to attend yes. Friend is very concerned at how she will react to the news of the planner being let go. Her DH is insistent she has no further involvement with the plans.....

More tea ......

OP posts:
MumnGran · 16/06/2013 15:19
MumnGran · 16/06/2013 15:18

Brilliant work, again, double.....and so positive that everyone is responding with understanding. Those must have been some well-worded calls. Talk about "cavalry to the rescue"!

You must be feeling absolutely shattered by now. Have a second [coffee]

Original poster
doubleshotespresso · 16/06/2013 15:08

Thanks so much everybody..... Yes I think this has more to do with friends' sisters' aspirations than what is the norm for everybody living in Australia ( she runs a media firm)......

We just returned from the hotel and my friend bawled her eyes out with relief when we got in the car afterwards..... Think we have pretty much nailed the plans and the manager there was super smart with suggestions and accommodating changes... I will detail later when her DH has heard everything..... The manager did comment that he thought my friend had been swept away with the planner and has agreed he will have no further contact with him until we have dispensed with his services... The manager visibly baulked at the sight of gift list.....

No hangover today thank goodness, we went for a coffee/de-brief on the way home when friend had composed herself a bit and had a great heart to heart. Her baby coped with ride so think we are all on the road back to sanity. Her DH is driving this way now will eat dinner with us later and then drive back up north later.....

We have had some wonderful emails and voicemails back from our marathon set of calls yesterday. . . Progress and relief for her that people are so understanding........

More later...... Brew

OP posts:
fuzzpig · 16/06/2013 11:16

Only just seen this thread so I'm pleased to read a good result. You are a lovely lovely person :)

zipzap · 16/06/2013 11:12

I reckon that not only was the party planner incompetent as already discussed but that he was self interested too.

I think that he gets a cut of everything bought from it and therefore it's in his interest to stuff it with only expensive things and then people will feel they have to buy things and hey presto he has a nice little waned on the side..,

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