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Original poster

I've just cupped my CO's penis by accident.

291 replies

NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 14:50

I work at a friendly, very well known company and have since the very beginning of their existence. All of the original staff do hugs and kisses on the cheeks as we have worked through thick and thin together.

My CO came over to introduce me to someone who is hoping to become a corporate client and went in for a hug.

I was totally unprepared and only got one arm around, the other was left straggling and I accidentally cupped his balls.

WE BOTH KNOW I CUPPED HIS BALLS, we exchanged a 'I know you know I just felt your balls look'

I'm mning in the toilet, shuddering in shame. Sad

OP posts:
LadyClariceCannockMonty · 12/06/2013 17:26

Can we nominate this for Classics? Fair cheered up a wet Wednesday and in fact has been the highlight of the month so far in my sad little life

cafecito · 12/06/2013 17:26

tears of laughter here in a silent library fab diagram Talc! Grin

Jestrin · 12/06/2013 17:26

Grin excellent thread! I am indebted to Talc for the visual

cafecito · 12/06/2013 17:25
Grin
Original poster
NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 17:25

I could bollockcup them all, I'm the fucking craziest bollockcupper out there

I think I've finally found my calling.

OP posts:
BellaVita · 12/06/2013 17:24

Howling!

Matildaandthematches · 12/06/2013 17:22

It has only just occurred to me that essentially I have admitted to sexually assaulting hundreds of men on a public forum. Still, at least my victims don't have to look me in the face ever again. NPMBITC - if you go down for this, I've got your back ok? No one would mess with a couple of bollock-cuppers in clink.

SybilRamkin · 12/06/2013 17:21

Crying with laughter at this thread!

But what if other colleagues saw it and are now jealous that they didn't get bollockcupped too? Perhaps if you do it to everyone it won't be so noticeably cringeworthy - it could be the new team bonding activity to promote unity at the office?

TheOneWithTheHair · 12/06/2013 17:20

Thank you for cheering me up. Great thread. Grin

THERhubarb · 12/06/2013 17:20

Anyone want to join me on pitching it to Dragon's Den?

NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner can bollockcup Theo whilst I do the talking. And possibly Hilary as I'm sure she has a bollock or two....

THERhubarb · 12/06/2013 17:18

I feel a new hobby coming on Grin

Original poster
NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 17:18

ergggggh, I didn't imagine an actual cup rubarb

OP posts:
Original poster
NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 17:17

Bollockcupping- an invisible suction that draws hand to unsuspecting testicles

Man 1: 'I just got bollockcupped'
Man 2: 'yeah that happened to me last week on the tube'

My mum does always say theres always someone worse off than yourself...

OP posts:
THERhubarb · 12/06/2013 17:16

It would act as a protection aid (from cupping, stray hands) and a gatherer of bollock cheese.

BookieMonster · 12/06/2013 17:12

If it has the same degree of innate suction, bollockcup would be a winner.

BookieMonster · 12/06/2013 17:11

Not that Matilda sounds that bothered!

THERhubarb · 12/06/2013 17:11

The only problem is that if he does become a new corporate client, he will expect the same kind of hugs every time you meet.

In fact, he has probably based his decision on that hug. He's now thrilled at imagining all the hugs he's going to get from you.

All those office parties, social gatherings, business lunches. You've just made his day!

BookieMonster · 12/06/2013 17:10

Such is the power of MN. NPMBITC, it really could be worse - you could be Matilda with her ball-cupping spasm.

infamouspoo · 12/06/2013 17:08

Matilda Grin
Am imagining hundreds of bemused commuters

DameFanny · 12/06/2013 17:08
Grin
Matildaandthematches · 12/06/2013 17:04

Matilda- do the balls tickle your hand then?

A bit... [goes shy]. Everyone's a winner surely? I like to think of it as a public service. No one has complained yet. They have looked a bit speechless occasionally.

Oblongata · 12/06/2013 17:03

I've never accidentally groped anyone: I'm clearly doing something wrong. Grin

Original poster
NobodyPutsMyBabyInTheCorner · 12/06/2013 17:02

Matilda- do the balls tickle your hand then? Grin

OP posts:
OhTiger · 12/06/2013 17:01

I was doing do well until " I instinctively 'clasp'"

gives up and weeps at thread< Grin

Matildaandthematches · 12/06/2013 16:59

Well I have a bit of a swingy army walk and, as explained, hand is approximately at ball height at the top of the backwards arc. The clasping? I don't know! I think it's a reflex. Don't babies clasp your finger if you tickle their palm? I think it's something like that... I've got it more under control now but I have to seriously concentrate on not clasping when it happens. The most important thing is NEVER to make eye contact after. Keep walking! Am glad to find it's a common phenomenon and not just me anyway!