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I really struggle to get my head round weasels

288 replies

HoneyDragon · 06/06/2013 18:46

I've seen them. I know what they look like, and often catch them whizzing across the road at weasel warp speed.

But their size always surprises me. Every time. I know they are small. But when you look at a picture of a weasel or think weasel, you think bigger. You don't think "oh, a weasel. That's a little bigger than a hamster that is". Or I don't. I go, ooooh a weasel. Wow, it's tiny, every time, the surprise never abates.

I struggle with weasel physics. That the actual weasel is not the size of the concept of weasel in my head.

I'm not sure how to fix it. Confused

OP posts:
CalamityKate · 09/06/2013 15:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CalamityKate · 09/06/2013 14:50

The stoat can be easily told from the weasel, by the simple fact that his tail is blacked, and his figure is slightly the bigger

I read that in one of the "Children of Cherry Tree Farm" books by Enid Blyton when I was little! Tammylan the wild man was teaching the children about wildlife Grin

HoneyDragon · 09/06/2013 14:36

Perhaps they class Ozzy as a lodger?

Or law enforcement owners don't believe he's too small to be a weasel, because everyone knows weasels are the size of cats.

OP posts:
QueenofDreams · 09/06/2013 13:25

I never knew weasels were that small. I thought they were similar in size to ferrets. I asked DP if he knew how big weasels are and he said small cat size. Can't believe it.

On another note apparently in many places it's illegal to own a pet weasel as they're classed as being dangerous, even to humans. I wonder if Ozzy's owner is aware of this?

BoreOfWhabylon · 09/06/2013 12:46

Wombats are weasels in reverse; they are much, much bigger than you expect them to be (like about 5 stone in weight).

They lure you in by pretending to be small and cuddly, but they are big, grumpy and they bite. Hard.

HoneyDragon · 09/06/2013 11:05

Woman's? Wombats.

OP posts:
HoneyDragon · 09/06/2013 11:05

Yes. That woman's are bigger than weasels is one of very few certainties in life.

I loved Country Practise, the wombat was called Fatso

OP posts:
LadyBeagleEyes · 09/06/2013 10:46

Yes Honey, that was it.Grin
And wombats are considerably bigger than weasels.
Fact.

HoneyDragon · 09/06/2013 10:44

Country Practise?

OP posts:
LadyBeagleEyes · 09/06/2013 10:44

Does anybody remember that Aussie daytime soap years ago where they had a pet wombat. He was lovely, I'd love to have a wombat.
I see pine martens up here, (Highlands), in my last house I used to feed them bread and jam, they have very sweet teeth.
I moved a 10 minute walk away but don't encourage them as they might attack my cats or vice versa.

HoneyDragon · 09/06/2013 10:39

It was the weasels wot wrote the article. It's all part of their evil plan to confound us with their tiny statures.

OP posts:
Nagoo · 09/06/2013 10:37

but they said it was a weasel Sad it looked legit. I may sue

HoneyDragon · 09/06/2013 10:29

Nagoo

You can tell it was a stoat because of its tail.

We were all just too polite to mention it Grin

Besides, its hardly your fault. It's all these weirdy woodland creatures that wander about brazenly flaunting their wrong sizedness.

OP posts:
Nagoo · 09/06/2013 10:11

I feel I must confess to provision of misleading information.

don't ask why, but I have been dwelling on this. I was horrified to discover that my measured weasel was a stoat.

I can only apologise.

I posted in good faith and I am as betrayed by that site as you have been by my erroneous posting.

always always check the facts. don't trust what you read online.

I am so sorry if this has perpetuated anyone's weasel size delusion.

Sad
BoreOfWhabylon · 07/06/2013 18:16

Grin Westley

WestleyAndButtockUp · 07/06/2013 18:05

When I was five, I pretended to my dad that I'd seen a fox.

He didn't believe me and asked me to describe it.

I said it was about as tall as a man on its hind legs, and it was wearing a red jacket.

So he said he did believe me.

BoreOfWhabylon · 07/06/2013 17:52

Have also seen teeny tiny weasels and bigger kick-ass stoats.

Has anyone mentioned wombats yet? Now, they are big, big bastards and solid, like tanks.

AND... they produce cubes of poo!!

BoreOfWhabylon · 07/06/2013 17:48

Oooh! I have seen a blonde badger - it was dead though.

It looked just like this one (scroll down a bit).

BeerTricksPotter · 07/06/2013 14:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BookieMonster · 07/06/2013 13:13

tru dat

BewitchedBotheredandBewildered · 07/06/2013 13:12

Did you know that there is a government department that deals with damage to houses caused by badgers?!
Something attacked our catflap one night, huge clawmarks and big chunks of it ripped off, scared our two labs to whining, quivering heaps.
General consensus was it was a badger.

BookieMonster · 07/06/2013 13:11

Tasmanian Devils (the real ones, not cartoon impostors) are freakishly intimidating. They square up to you and eye you off while in the enclosure right in front of the "These beasties are well fucking hard and have a bite per inch force of twenty squillion to one so don't even think about getting close or they'll fucking have you" sign. Doesn't matter how small they are. They are evil fuckers.

OvO · 07/06/2013 13:04

I was sure weasels were small cat sized. Shock

I just asked my DH and he knew they were tiny. This has really annoyed me for some reason. What a bastard, knowing that when I didn't.

GoofyIsACow · 07/06/2013 12:58

I HAVE SEEN A BADGER AND CAN CONFIRM THEY ARE REAL

And fucking massive, i nearly ran one over, it was stood in the middle of the road, bold as brass, i came round a corner a little too fast a lot of years ago and... Well fuck, it was the size of Jeanette Kranky...

TheRealFellatio · 07/06/2013 12:49

I have stroked a beaver. It was very soft and silky.

STOP IT. You are a disgrace. Angry

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