Have you ever encountered anyone this cheeky?

Hehe what a great thread.
I don't have any crazy stories to add but I do remember the time my notoriously tight cousin wanted to buy a pack of chewing gum and asked me if I had 20p as she "didn't want to break into a £1"

I am well-known for throwing parties. Friends rarely reciprocate.

Friend asked me help her re: her 40th party. First thing she said was, 'can we have it at yours? Because you're really relaxed about hosting and mess.'

The party didn't happen

Years ago my DH bought a really nice portable radio to use around the house, just before my PITA MIL arrived for a holiday.

About a week after she'd left, I went to use the radio & couldn't find it. I asked DH where it was & he said, "Mum said her radio at home is broken. She went on & on about it, & in the end I gave her ours".

I made it clear that this was never to happen again, & it never did. I don't blame DH; MIL was a whiny CF.

When I was a child, my dad had a greenhouse in which he grew tomatoes, cucumbers etc.

We went on holiday for a week and the lady next door kindly offered to water the plants while we were away. Dad told her to help herself to some produce by way of a thank you.

We got back to find every plant stripped. She sold the lot to the neighbours and kept the money.

This has taken me days to read
Loved every minute of it

i was bridesmaid at my friend (DFs) wedding. DFs Auntie (DFA) was a real CF. DF was having a child free wedding with no cousins (she has around 40 first cousins and they have around 20 children so it wasnt feasible at the venue chosen. this caused HUGE problems on its own but thats another thread). DFA heard about this ruling from DFs mum (her sister) and immediately rang DF. "Is my daughter and her partner invited as we need to book the hotel for them to stay over?". DF explained no, she cant invite one cousin out of 40. DFA then got very upset and explained that, as her other child had died suddenly, 10 years before, her daughter would never get to attend many weddings and was therefore the "special" cousin in the family and should be considered on the level of aunties/uncles and not cousins. DF was mortified and said yes she could come. DFA was immediately on the phone to her siblings, gloating to them that HER precious daughter was coming. Daughter (also a CF), showed up empty handed of course with no shame (shes in her 30s, not a child).

Also, DFA managed to shoehorn her way into the hen do. We hired a bar and had to pay a £200 deposit, paid back in bar tab. rather than ask each hen for money (and then work out how much each persons drink costs to get their share back) the 4 bridesmaids just paid £50 each and that was their bar tabs. They agreed no buying friends money and try to keep to your own £50. DFA found out and followed bridesmaids to the bar each time, asking them to go into rounds with her. She got one bridesmaid (DFs little sister, DFA's other niece) and told her to buy her a drink on the tab. DS said no, that wouldnt be fair, plus that would open it up to other bridesmaids doing it and the tab would be spent in seconds as one bridesmaid is a twat and only needed an excuse to drain the tab. DFA threw an absolute fit, shouted at DS that "what the hell am i supposed to do then? i always go in rounds. this is what you do on a night out - you wouldnt understand. this is what happens!!" DS (only young) stood her ground and refused. DFA stomped off, came back an hour later, took sister to one side and laughed about it, saying "dont know what came over me. Its because im thinking of deceased son and things still get to me" . DS was gracious, said it was ok and hotfooted it away from DFA.

DFA later that night kicked off because nobody wanted to go to mcdonalds with her and then cornered the bride and told her that her fiance was weird. She then cornered fiances mum (soon be be MIL of DF) and told her all about DFs sexual and relationship past.

In the morning DFA got her aunt and had stern words. DFA simply turned to the little sister and said "I cant believe you told her everything we spoke about in confidence". She had clearly forgotten been too pissed to realize who she had been talking to and thought it was the sister and not the bride or future MIL! She then half apologized to bride and said "i get upset at events because of deceased son". WHY SHOEHORN YOURSELF INTO THEM THEN?!

The whole wedding was a family disaster and has caused irreparable problems for my DF. All are now LC with DFA.

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I love this thread! May it long continue!

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I might have posted about this before. So apologies If I have:

There's a regular lady selling The Big Issue in my town. I'd stop and chat and over time got quite friendly. She told me she had a 12month old ds but couldn't take him out as she didn't have a pushchair so he stayed in with her mum (the nan).

The next time I was in town I took a page from the Argos catalogue that had the same spare buggy I had in the shed. I showed her and asked if it would be any good. She said no but would I be able to buy one for her and then produced pages of a catalogue out of her pocket. She wanted me to buy some £500 trendy one. I told her I wouldn't even be able to afford that.

I stopped buying the Big Issue after that.

I've only recently realised that a friend of mine is in fact a CF. I've known her for 7 years, invited her over to mine for BBQ/group dinners on numerous occasions over the years. I've been invited back twice in that time! Maybe she doesn't like me.. but here are other examples:

She was attending a wedding and asked a friend (Becky*) if she could stay at her friend Jean's parent's house on the night of the wedding because they live near the wedding venue- she's never met Jean! Then got Jean's parents to drive her to the wedding. She also told us that a taxi back was £40 so she shared one with someone else and gave them £10 contribution towards the taxi .

This needs reviving...the Christmas CFs will be out in abundance by now!

I never realised how bad my friend was until I read these. She's on many occasions come around my house, sat on her ass and then expected me to feed, bath and look after her children, whilst she sits on her phone. She's the messiest person I have ever met and I can't deal with going to her house as on the odd occasion I have, I have had to cook our dinner or at least washed up and cleaned the kitchen so she can get it ready. She has left my house in a complete state when she brings her children over, but I would never do the same with my own kids. I know i'm a mug, but she's my oldest friend and has been very good to me, so I try to see it as her flaw and just arrange to go out somewhere with the kids rather than meet up at houses.

I also had a friend when I was around 20 who was CF as could be. She used to go around my friends house before work each day to use her expensive make up! She also used to invite herself over at meal times and always pleaded poverty. my friend was a single mum to a baby and she was working a decent paid job. She also was always getting free drinks, never paying rounds and would borrow clothes and never give them back, as she had 'lost them'. Luckily we cut her lose years ago.

I’m on holiday, and have read this thread over aweek! Bumping, for those who never saw it the first time round! Thanks for all your entertaining stories everyone, I hope everything has been on the up since...

I love this thread so I'm bumping it in case anyone has anything else to add.

Just spent 3 hours reading every post on this thread.
Nothing to add, except wow!!

.

I have just spend the last 3 days reading this whole thread... OMG!!!

ahhh I have a good one!

My ex who put me in hospital because he stabbed me repeatedly in the face with a fork when drunk, on purpose, amongst other similar incidents.. sent me a long email 4 years later when I was about to marry my husband.

The email basically detailed that it was incredibly insulting that he was not going to be best man at our wedding seeing as how he had known my husband the longest out of all his friends, and how I should put whatever differences we had had behind me and value the friendship he had had with my husband....

It was true he had been a childhood friend of my husband to be... it was also true that my husband had not spoken to him for 5 years since FINDING OUT HE STABBED ME IN THE FACE WITH A FUCKING FORK ON PURPOSE!

My whole family knew what hed done..... all our friends knew what he had done..... yet still he seemed to genuinely believe it was some sort of slight to not be best man at our wedding.... expected to be stood up there at the alter, me walking up the aisle with the giant scar on my face given to me by him STABBING ME IN THE FACE WITH AN ACTUAL FORK.... Im not joking, he thought this was a legitimate slight to him....

He wasnt even bloody invited. If hed turned up idve called the police.
He also emailed my husband to be... who replied detailing that we would call the police if we saw him any where near the event and not to contact either of us again.

I just stumbled in here after a mention in another thread and have wasted so much time but couldn't drag myself away rofl. The Mexican house wins but a short mile but there are some right gob-smackers in here.

Many years ago I remember a newish friend asking if I fancied going swimming together with the kids. She went through the swimming baths entrance first and spent ages chatting away merrily to the attendant while I tried to keep track of my two kids and her three. Finally she moved on and I moved up to pay for me and mine to be told by the cashier my friend hadn't paid. Yeah I know I should have made that the cashier's problem not mine but I was taken aback and coughed up. Also the friend had a 'ditzy' way of forgetting things, I eventually realised how convenient the things she forgot were. We finished the swim and she suggested lunch at a pub near her home. I reckoned we could sort out the swimming cash when we paid for lunch. We finished lunch and she annouced that she'd forgotten her purse so could I get it this time. Before I could really answer she swooped up her kids and exited. I could give you a fair list of other incidents but they included a cake I baked for her being passed off as her own and her having the brass neck to let her husband offer me a piece without a thought, shopping done for her that I never got paid for, turning up at mine to feed the kids and bath them in the evening so they'd be nice and sleepy when she got them home.Yup, I was a total mug.

The last incident I remember didn't really involve me but left me gobsmacked all the same. Her hubby used to work away regularly and went he was home he would be quizzed as to whether he had 'pleasured himself in the shower' as in her opinion to do so would be unfaithful to her. I only knew this as she gave him the showdown in front of me. Meanwhile, she was shagging his best mate. No idea what the outcome of that was as I moved on...

I had a friend (who I don't ever invite over anymore) who would bring her kids over, stay all day and not watch her toddlers one bit. Says to me one day "I love coming to your place, I don't have to watch the kids and they can run wild and do whatever they want".... Ummm 😣

I've killed this thread, haven't I?

We had some 'friends' stay with us in our home for a week holiday (abroad).
When they arrived, they gifted us a bottle of whisky which we never opened - I offered several times but every time the consensus was for wine or whatever. (All food, drinks, etc. were provided by us)

Anyway we all had a lovely time and on the last day, they get into their car, we stand outside the house ready to wave them goodbye, when the husband quickly get out of the car and rush back past us, inside the house. We joke about him being in a rush, blabla, assuming he was going to the loo.
He comes back past us at a trot, as he climbs back into the car we see that he is holding the bottle of whisky, gives it to his wife to hold, and drives off!!!

My bil once moaned to me that he was annoyed about his df not bothering to spend any time with his dd, doesn't come and take her to the park etc. Dfil is full time carer for his disabled wife along with problems of his own. They also live 45 minutes away!

Also we were once on holiday with bil as well as my own db and families, his dd age 5 kept waking the other kids up in the mornings ( our dc 5 and 14 were on holiday and having late nights) but his dd had to be kept in her routine hence early morning wake ups but all sharing a room, dn14 told him to get up with her and take her downstairs as she was waking them up, his answer was "well we have to get up with her for the rest of year!" needless to say I told dn5 she must leave the room and go to mum and dad's if the other girls were asleep!
He's an entitled knob don't know how lovely sil puts up with him, we've just heard that his cheekyfuckery has extended to his other in laws and is currently not speaking to his fil even tho bil has just bought a holiday home next door to where they live in another country. I don't know the details but I know cfery will have been involved!