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Original poster

To pelt my cakes at this mum's head in the playground this afternoon? <fume>

939 replies

MarmaladeTwatkins · 27/03/2013 13:00

The school are having a cake sale tomorrow and have BEGGED for donations of cakes. They have been Facebooking about how desperate they are all week as they want to make a dent in the £12,000 target needed for some new play equipment in the playground. One might think that flogging cakes at 30 pee each is not the way to make a dent but that's another thing...

I am pushed for time this week but I thought I could do some cornflake easter nests with some mini eggs on top as a quick alternative to baking and frosting two dozen fairy cakes. So I went out and bought the stuff (which I reckon cost more than they will get from the sales tbh) Then I replied to one of the FB begging messages saying "I will bring some cornflake easter nests tomorrow, will have about 40" Then one of the PTA wimmin replied "Ha ha! That's great but be prepared to take most of them home as they don't sell as well as real cakes."

Fuck. You. Bitch.

OP posts:

Floristneedsaname · 27/03/2013 14:10

When the kids all come out covered in chocolate you'll know you have won.

But will you please make this little beauty for PTA woman.

LangenFlugelHappleHoff · 27/03/2013 14:10

I really want the cornflake nazi to be a MNer!!!!

Epic fail on 2 social sites!!! One can dream...

LifeSavedbyLego · 27/03/2013 14:09

Cornflake cakes always sell out first! Is the woman mad? My DCs go to a moderately poncey school were the parents have a habit of giving individual polenta cakes or some such horror. Me I always make cornflake cakes covered in smarties or mini eggs, they go every time.

I once diverged into lurid cupcakes (the kind where you can taste the colouring) with clashing buttercream covered in sprinkles. I thought they'd be a hit, but not as much as cornflake cakes...

Original poster

MarmaladeTwatkins · 27/03/2013 14:07

"(if you are as narrow minded and petty as I am, and I am sure you are"

Whatever gave you that idea?

I am really tempted now to volunteer to assist at the bake sale tomorrow. Just to be sure that old mrs. hair bear isn't hiding my cakes under her massive maxi skirt...

OP posts:

minouminou · 27/03/2013 14:05

Oddly enough, GetOeuf, Churlish Chickpea Denier composed a hilarious personal statement for her (failed) election bid.

How we laughed. And scanned it for future amusement.

Ha ha!

ICBINEG · 27/03/2013 14:05

damn you all!

Just got asked by a senior colleague what I was so happy about...

I am not sure that CUNT bunting would have gone down well....I had to scrabble and tap dance and make something up about my DD.

WhereYouLeftIt · 27/03/2013 14:04

Ahem ... I already have a pinny emblazoned with

PISS OFF
I'M BUSY

Bought for me by DH especially to wear when I'm cooking Christmas dinner, which I have down to a tee and no I don't want any help telling you what I want done will take time and mess up my carefully-honed schedule! (That man really knows me well !)

Startail · 27/03/2013 14:04

We have friends of the secondary school, I don't know what they do.
I've done 11years of PTA. That is enough.

Booyhoo · 27/03/2013 14:03

"Ha ha! That's great but be prepared to take most of them home as they don't sell as well as real cakes."

i would regard that as a challenge!

if i were in a devious sort of mood i might set up a wee stall outside the school gate and sell them to people on their way in and then make a big show of announcing just how much I myself, on my own with my own cornflake cakes, had raised for the school. emphasis on ME! i would of course hold one cake back to throw at PTA woman's head.

ipswichwitch · 27/03/2013 14:03

how about re-boxed luxury herbal tea bags in a lovely floral packet entitled 'Twatbags'

I need those. And some arsebiscuits to go with them.

HorryIsUpduffed · 27/03/2013 14:03

Hurrah for the chair!

DS(4) has been begging to make crispy cakes all week. Definitely primary school crack.

IME and IMHO children like stuff they recognise and know is reliable. Lemon drizzle might be nice but cornflake cakes will definitely be nice. And there's no danger that it might actually be coconut or something instead, which would be a HEINOUS CRIME and total waste of your 50p.

GetOeuf · 27/03/2013 14:02

People who go mad on primary PTAs end up on the governing body of secondary schools.

One good thing about that (if you are as narrow minded and petty as I am, and I am sure you are ) is that parent governers need to be voted in, so their lobbying statement comes home with the newsletter and you can point and laugh and take the piss out of someone who have held a brooding resentment with since Year 6.

minouminou · 27/03/2013 14:02

You HAVE to update us!

InLoveWithDavidTennant · 27/03/2013 14:01

that is a brilliant response! up yours snotty cake lady

i hope none of her cakes sell. your nests will sell really quickly. they tend to be very popular

Bakingnovice · 27/03/2013 14:01

Choc cornflakes cakes are the best sellers at our school. I think it's because the buyers have cottoned on to the fact that 90% of the fairy cakes being sold are the '12 pack for 50p' ones from tesco with a few sprinkles thrown over.

BookieMonster · 27/03/2013 14:01

No response from Lemon Drizzle Mum, though. I am dying to hear what she says. Do you think she'll be all passive aggressive at the stall tomorrow putting your cakes at the back of the table? You've got to watch these UberMum types.

Original poster

MarmaladeTwatkins · 27/03/2013 14:00

Oh yes, GetOeuf! They can be seen by everyone at the school who's on the page. Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ah CUNT.

OP posts:

KatieMiddleton · 27/03/2013 14:00

Fuck off cunty-chops bunting from the Leave The Bastard range... for when a restraining order is not enough.

ginslinger · 27/03/2013 14:00

She's going to have to eat humble pie now. Or a humble fucking cupcake.

Wewereherefirst · 27/03/2013 13:58

at the chair usurping lemon drizzle cake bitch. I bet she's at the chair for showing her up.

DuchessFanny · 27/03/2013 13:58

Now you have to think of something cutting to say to accompany a scathing look at her left over lemon drizzle ...

"ah no luck selling AGAIN this year ? can i recommend Easter choccy crispy nests ?!"

anklebitersmum · 27/03/2013 13:58

Secondary school have Receptionists

worsestershiresauce · 27/03/2013 13:58

I'd buy them in preference to boring old fairy cakes any day. Fairy cakes can be spectacularly awful if badly made, and are usually topped with far to much gunk, so I tend to steer clear. Chocolate cornflake cakes with mini eggs on the other hand - absolutely love them!

crazypaving · 27/03/2013 13:58

you've inspired me to make chocolate cornflake cakes for the first time with my toddler this weekend.

would love a motherfucker apron to do it in, while he still can't read.

GetOeuf · 27/03/2013 13:56

Oh no marm wasn't asking for the FB page (not on facebook anyway) just wondering if the messages could have been seen by others or if it was private message.

But that is a RESULT. Now you are best friends with the chairman of the PTA. IN HER FACE.

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