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Original poster

To pelt my cakes at this mum's head in the playground this afternoon? <fume>

939 replies

MarmaladeTwatkins · 27/03/2013 13:00

The school are having a cake sale tomorrow and have BEGGED for donations of cakes. They have been Facebooking about how desperate they are all week as they want to make a dent in the £12,000 target needed for some new play equipment in the playground. One might think that flogging cakes at 30 pee each is not the way to make a dent but that's another thing...

I am pushed for time this week but I thought I could do some cornflake easter nests with some mini eggs on top as a quick alternative to baking and frosting two dozen fairy cakes. So I went out and bought the stuff (which I reckon cost more than they will get from the sales tbh) Then I replied to one of the FB begging messages saying "I will bring some cornflake easter nests tomorrow, will have about 40" Then one of the PTA wimmin replied "Ha ha! That's great but be prepared to take most of them home as they don't sell as well as real cakes."

Fuck. You. Bitch.

:(

OP posts:
BeingAWifeIsNotForMe · 27/03/2013 20:34

Blackeyedsusan Grin

Catmint · 27/03/2013 20:31

Whoever it was way up thread who coined the phrase, " citrus titted arsepart" I think I love you a bit and I am appliquéing your words onto an apron.

Original poster
MarmaladeTwatkins · 27/03/2013 20:30

I just said "OK, will bring my nests in tomorrow. Also, I am now free tomorrow afternoon if you need another pair of hands to shift some cakes?"

Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

OP posts:
Original poster
MarmaladeTwatkins · 27/03/2013 20:23

Awwww, thanks everyone for being kaind about cornflake cakes and not making me feel like a shit mother. You're a lovely bunch. Brew and a cornflake cake for you all at Casa Twatters.

OP posts:
KoalaFace · 27/03/2013 20:22

Hooray Marmalade Grin

Don't forget your "Smug Bitch" apron to wear while pulling bastard face at LDC lady!

Emilythornesbff · 27/03/2013 20:21

I missed the chairs comment bit.
What was that then?

StealthPolarBear · 27/03/2013 20:21

What did you say?

UterusUterusGhali · 27/03/2013 20:20

Marking place.

Please take a kick-arse lemon cake in too!

MyDarlingClementine · 27/03/2013 20:17

I havant read all this yet, but I just wanted to say I adore cornflake cakes, I really do, I would much rather buy those than plain sponge actually.

scratchandsniff · 27/03/2013 20:16

YANBU what a Cheeky fucker. I've made some today eaten about 10 they are yum. Cup cakes are so last year Smile

blackeyedsusan · 27/03/2013 20:16

op, you are going about this all wrong. you need to use weetabix, presoaked in milk and sculptered into points. leave to harden, then disguise with chocolate. I also recommend inch wide elastic to launch

babybarrister · 27/03/2013 20:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
MarmaladeTwatkins · 27/03/2013 20:12

OK have decided to shit-stir a bit and have just commented under the PTA chair's comment offering my services at the sale.

OP posts:
Undertone · 27/03/2013 20:03

Has it already been suggested that they raise the £12k by selling obscene soft furnishings and houseworkwear? Literally sweep all the cakes aside off the tables then slap down the piles of bunting customized with CUNT in marker pen?

Emilythornesbff · 27/03/2013 19:57

I really need to know how the bake sale goes.
As my nap attempt was unsuccessful Sad I need the excitement of cake gate to keep me going.
I will accept further cunt bunting style humour or PTA fb updates. Don't be shy op, I'll be here all night.

saulaboutme · 27/03/2013 19:53

Gosh so sorry came in really late on this op.

Make your cakes and be proud.

Wouldn't it be awful if a wee sparrow shat on hers lol.

Btw, tell her to her face you found her comment discouraging. She wasn't "obviously" being sarcastic. Very bad spirited.

KatieScarlett2833 · 27/03/2013 19:43

Also marking place, can't wait to hear about bakesalegate tomorrow Grin

tethersend · 27/03/2013 19:41

Tell her that they're ever so moreish on account of your secret ingredient.

Dealer-grade Moroccan hashish.

FrankWippery · 27/03/2013 19:41

Fuck her, she's clearly an inadequate cunt.

Be sure to give her a kick from me.

whosiwhatsit · 27/03/2013 19:32

Good luck tomorrow, marmalade. I'm shamelessly marking my place as I must know how the showdown goes tomorrow.

Catbert4pm · 27/03/2013 19:26

I decided to buy pancakes for the school pancake disco, as I was happy to make pancakes for the family but didn't then want to have to do another batch for the disco. The next day an email was sent by the PTA head honcho thanking everyone who brought pancakes "especially those who MADE them". It highly amused me then, and it still does now. When it comes to PTA stuff, I bake/make when I feel like it, and buy when it suits.Grin

SugariceisaGoodEgg · 27/03/2013 19:22

I love Harper Valley PTA.

Go Dolly!

stealthsquiggle · 27/03/2013 19:20

If PITA PTA lady is on here, she has to do the random letter abusive cupcakes.

OP - I would have been tempted to reply "maybe yours don't"

drjohnsonscat · 27/03/2013 19:19

truthfully, I thought it was hers anyway, no idea it wasn't her song or her original rendition! Good to add to my country music knowledge!

And how much would you love to have Dolly on your PTA. So much more fun than uptight lemon drizzle lady.

CheerfulYank · 27/03/2013 19:15

Oh, I guess she did do a cover of it! Sorry DrJohnson! Blush