Omg such anality from pil. Come and share your anal behaviour stories (lighthearted)

PepeLePew posting the list through the door is hilarious

My pils bring their slippers with them (not their proper slippers, they have special fold away travel slippers) whenever they come over.
In a way I suppose it's nice that they feel so comfortable here but part of me just thinks..."wtf?"

OMG. Dave only allows me plastic Lidl tumblers. Proper glasses are for the grown-ups. Clearly, I am still a child. I am nearly 50.

My ILs are becoming obsessed by waste as they get older so cook exactly the amount they think is needed for a meal, but it is never enough. You will have a Sunday dinner with 2 roast potatoes the size of marbles per person and a dessertspoonful of peas each. We smuggle in chocolate biscuits as emergency rations.

When DCs were small, MIL produced some plastic cups that DH and DBIL had when they were kids. They were still being given drinks in them when they were about 12, only allowed mugs when they and nephew all protested. The plastic cups are still in the cupboard though, ready for the next generation presumably.

They use stuff not just out of date, but very out of date. They got some cans of Coke out at Xmas, expiry date 2009. When they moved house we found tinned foods over 10 years old and they protested when we wanted to chuck them!

This makes my parents sound comparatively normal.

Although they do turn off everything, at the wall, all the time. Last time I was there, I went into my bedroom to read a book, and turned on the bedside light. Unplugged. I plugged it in, read for a while, turned it off, left the room. One hour later, I go back in, turn on the bedside light...DM had sneaked in and unplugged it.

I found, by accident, my parents' "we are leaving the house for longer than three hours" list the other day. It is two pages long, and says things like "check front door is locked", and you tick it when you've checked it. I asked DF how that worked when you'd be outside before you could check it. He said they post it back through the letter box.

My mum told me carpets must not be hoovered for a full year after being fitted. And expected me to leave mine well alone when I moved into a new build with its cream carpet throughout. Can you imagine?!

Haha I thought my parents were the only ones who did this stuff....

We find staying with DH's mum really hard work because of all the rules. No one is allowed to use the kitchen without supervision, not even to get a drink of water- either the wrong container is selected (we are none of us permitted to use a glass because we might break it) and the water has to come from the tap in the utility room (I have given up trying to understand why the kitchen sink does not dispense potable water).

MIL is currently fretting about the fact that I have started taking my own coffee and caffetiere. I started because she tried to serve me decaf, on the grounds that 'no one drinks caffeinated any more', and I just couldn't handle the mornings without a decent brew. I'm afraid that now I find a certain evil satisfaction in quietly making myself a drink in my own pot, knowing that she is trying to work out what is so special about it, so that she can get one and then insist that I use it. She has to satisfy herself with reminding me every single bleeding time about the rather involved arrangements for the disposal of used grounds, with a short riff on her terror of sink blockages, but as long as I get my coffee I can deal with that. I have to smuggle the sugar in in those single shot packets though as she is permanently on a diet and treats it like crack cocaine, but that's OK as long as I hide the wrappers.....

My DMIL once brought round a 3 day old chicken carcase for me.

Turned out it was to make stock with. EEuww.

My DF is very much of the count the sprouts out type person but even then eats so very little that there is often waste which must never be thrown out

If you foolishly agree to stay for an impromptu lunch, as I did a few weeks ago, you will be served soft crackers, mouldy cheese, curling ham, off yoghurt, mouldy cake and black bananas. YUM.

All washed down with luke warm coffee - there's no need to actually let the kettle boil because you just have to let the drink cool down anyway. Come on, everyone knows that!

My SIL and BIL have for the last 25 years gone food shopping on the same day of the week, at the same time of day, to the same supermarket, and bought exactly the same things and spent the same amount of money (allowing for inflation.) They never deviate from their routine and can tell you practically to the penny what they will spend, and exactly what they will eat Monday through to Sunday.

I would have slit my own throat by now, just to relieve the monotony.

are you my secret sister Sparklingbrook?

Good Lord no recharge the Ewbank is just so handy you see, no plugging in or anything.

My mum is like this. Everything is planned, dinner is always at 5pm etc etc.

She is horrified that i dont iron my bedsheets and my pjs. She is even more horrified that i dont own an iron at all.

Gets up early then moans that shes tired because "she had a bad night". Shes retired and could lie in til midday if she wanted.

Set days for doing the food shopping , specific days to wash items eg a towels day, a bedding day and so on.

Shes getting worse as she gets older im sure of it.

We are with pil at present and they are very sweet but so bloody uptight about everything.
Bil has been away for a week so he left car with pil so that it "wasn't left in the street" it has a steering lock on and fil takes it for a drive each day! The car is an old banger worth about two hundred quid.
Kids can't even eat a banana without a table cloth,mat and plate

Leaving the house to walk to shops is a major ordeal. Costs hats gloves change of shoes everything switched off at the wall last minute run upstairs for wallets. I could have been there and back.

Ledkr, are we related? Are you actually staying with my BIL and SIL? Sure must be. Surely.

Omg. Jean has a ewbank. It lives in the same cupboard as the proper Hoover. If there is dirt on the carpet and it is not one of the days on which proper hoovering is allowed (Tuesdays and Fridays) then the ewbank comes out and it's rubbish. Why not just get the Hoover out and do the job properly?

FIL once spent an entire Christmas sulking because we'd kept beer in the garage, when we knew he likes it at room temperature. There was no option of just waiting for it to warm up, he knew he would have no longer fancied a beer by then. MIL was disappointed with me and whispered 'You know he won't have it cold like the youngsters'. He was in his early 50s then, so not exactly at the point that doing anything out of the ordinary might have been the last thing he did.

mayaswell it is not just the cupboard I am missing; I had no idea there was a drying ritual and period of abstinence ritual. Is this what happened before central heating?

Aaargh! Room temp beer and lager! Yes! I thought it was just us that suffered this at the hands of my DF!

Rewarming the gravy

My MIL, when invited for Sunday lunch or Christmas dinner would turn up at 11.30 as lunch should be on the table at 12pm on the dot in her opinin.I started making sure it was ready later and later but she would sit at her seat until it was ready, even though she was encouraged to play with her DGC until it was ready. She would then leave half an hour after finishing the meal, she lived alone and had nothing to rush home for and the DC beg her to stay and play.

When we went there for a meal she would be so anxious and refuse help that it was uncomortable to watch.

egg airing, according to MIL means going outside on the line, then in tumble dryer for an hour on high, then ironed on max, then hung on hangers in airing cupboard. You then can't wear it for about 12 hours.

BooCanary - an airing cupboard! I have vaguely heard of them but don't know what it is. I don't think I have one.

I realise I am ranting now, but this thread is seriously cathartic!

Sparklingbrook Another weird foible is not keeping beer/lager in the fridge. Noted and agreed. Red wine DOES go in the fridge???

After 25 years, I do not understand my PILs bathroom use/ shower schedule. I know they involve:
Priority pecking order(most important, maybe you shouldn't be getting washed?);
If the bath or the shower is used;
Tile drying protocol;
Volume of hot water usage;
Which towel are to be used and how they are left afterwards;
etc.

The only one I follow is the one I [now] fully understand; toothbrush and toiletries must NOT be left in the bathroom in between daily usage. They have thin lips and about it but we really can't understand what the feck is going on.

Eggrules - you must have an airing cupboard. My DM is still AGHAST that we bought a house without an airing cupboard. She simply cannot compute how we can possibly manage without one (tumble dryer, radiators, cupboards....).

My DM also does the socket switching off... after every time she uses the kettle it is switched off at the wall. Really annoying!

Every now and again my DH snaps with the food weighing/counting (normally towards the end of our annual holiday with DM & DF), and starts questionning why my DM is in charge of deciding how many potatoes he is allowed - SACRE BLEU! My DM just looks completely baffled that anyone may want anymore than has been specifically allocated/planned for.