Omg such anality from pil. Come and share your anal behaviour stories (lighthearted)

My DF writes the start date inside kitchen rolls to see how long they last for. He also has a measuring jug by the kettle with lines drawn in Sharpie to let you know how much water you should put in the kettle, so you don’t boil more water than you need for a cup of tea.

georgedawes

Oh and they have a dishwasher but hardly any of their crockery and pans etc go in the dishwasher, so they have the worst of both worlds by doing loads of washing up and running the dishwasher

Oh my mother refuses to use the dishwasher, or leave stuff for us to put in the dishwasher. She washes everything by hand, using multiple sink fulls of hot water. Then whinges when she can’t have a shower as she’s used all the hot water and has to wait for the tank to reheat.

I try explaining, but get “i’m just making myself useful”. No, you’re not. You’re using all the hot water, leaving dripping dishes all over the work tops, and only do the cups and plates leaving the pans so I have to run the dishwasher half full anyway!

I often stack all her washed stuff in anyway, save drying it.

My ex mil couldn't see you at hers without putting a paintbrush or a spade in your hand. Apparently one must keep busy, and not idle.

My father also keeps cable ties.

This thread is brilliant and knocks my teabag sharing (at least four or five cups) parents into a cocked hat

My mother also expects me to remember what time she gets up and goes to bed and never EVER text, emails or WhatsApp her while she's supposed to be in bed because her phone is next to her bed and when it dings it wakes her up.

I have suggested that she put it on silent. No, because I or my brother might ring her in an emergency. (They also have a landline, one of the phones of which is next to her bed.) Also, we've both grown up and left home. I think we ought to be able to figure out a plan that isn't "Ring Mum's mobile at 2am".

I have suggested that most phones these days have custom silent settings - e.g. to silence some dings at some times and not others. She's sure hers doesn't. Shall I check? I don't want you to fiddle with the settings, you might break it. I could Google it if you tell me the model of your phone? It sounds a bit complicated.

So instead every few months I get snotty messages back about her having been woken at the crack of dawn because I sent her a fundamentally asynchronous communication at the wrong time. Which is often the only time I can conveniently do it when not drowning under children. So have therefore cut right back on that sort of thing because I CBA to check and remember the time every time I want to send a cute baby pic. And then I get the snotty messages about how she won't even recognise my DC when she next sees them and would it be so hard to send one little photo?

Oh my goodness, what a wonderful thread.

Everything, for my parents, is "a bit complicated". Yes, that's because they MAKE it complicated by having to plan every second of the day, every bite eaten, every mile travelled, and make about nine thousand contingency plans in case of X, Y or Z. Life has moved on now - shops are always open, you've always got your mobile, Google exists. But deciding to "play it by ear" is akin to suggesting a family game of Russian roulette.

We've booked a self-catering cottage for later in the year and my parents started to worry about what we'd do about eating. "Ooh, if we're only allowed in at 5pm it's a bit late for the shops but we won't be able to carry stuff with all our luggage..."
Me: "We'll do a Tesco order for the evening we arrived. Bring enough to give DCs their dinner then it can arrive in time for us to cook ours."
DPs: "Ooh, sounds a bit risky... what if they turn up early before we arrive?"
Me: "They're not allowed to just do that, or if they do they have to com back within your time slot if you ask."
DPs: "True, but they might be late..."
Me: "Then we'll either nip to the local shops or get a takeaway."
DPs: "What if there's a substitution in the order?"
Me:

They get an Ocado order every week. They're both retired. They're always in all afternoon but it's like the world ends if Mr Ocado is five seconds outside the timeslot or even turns up towards the latter half of the timeslot!

They will also never just ring up a company about anything but will fret over it for days. Once we were on a train home from my grandmother's when it broke down and they realised they'd be late for the Ocado order. (Are you sensing a theme?!) They fretted over it and decided they'd just have to not have any shopping that week and go to Sainsbury's on the high street tomorrow.

At this point I snapped, rang Ocado up, and pushed the delivery slot back two hours. No problem. But they were totally amazed that they could do that. They'll never ask anything unless they know the answer already, whereas I think it's literally the helpline's job to try and help me.

Phew, that was cathartic!

Such a great read.

My late MIL had a place for everything, and everything in it's place.

She had her tiny dictionary, pencil and rubber all neatly laid up in a row on a cupboard shelf when she wasn't doing the crossword.

what a great classic thread really enjoyed it

my mil used to stand with her coat on for half an hour before we went anywhere-i used to say we're not off yet-i know she said but just stood there in her coat tutting that noone was ready

In DH's family, the men pour the wine and the women pour soft drinks. I unwittingly committed a huge faux-pas by pouring wine myself, rather than asking a man to do it. This, despite the fact that I have been professionally trained.

When DH's son comes round, DH will invariably get him to pour the wine rather than me. He will then invariably complain once he has gone about the fact that he just sloshes it into glasses, mixing the sediment etc. Again, I am professionally trained and could do it, but no (this only applies when we have company).

No idea why really. DH is pretty egalitarian, does more housework than me, does all the ironing. We don't have men and women's jobs, except for this. He can't explain himself

Just bumping this up for anyone needing some light hearted reading :)

My PILs turn the heating off if the go out, in case the regularly serviced, modern boiler blows up while they are not there supervising it.

If we go out for lunch with them in the colder months, they go in their own car, so they can set off home before the rest of us, in order to put the heating back on & warm up the house before we get there

Quite frankly, I'd rather be out of the house when the bloody thing blows up, rather than in the house "supervising it"

It's sad but I am reading this thread thinking how lovely it will be when I have the time to do all these things. I currently have a toddler and would love to have the time to put all the food in the house into Tupperware

Lots of these things are a hangover of the war and rationing,make do and mend,poverty. Also they have nothing to fill their time,another good reason not to retire.
Having said that my mum tells me how to hang out her washing,how to put stuff in cupboards,she is hanging onto the controls even as she fades due to ill health. Bless her.

Not in laws but work too...school kitchen.
The cook has complained she had to throw 2 jugs of water away
Tap water.
Ffs

Not in-laws, but at work the other week I had to stand behind a colleague who was washing a 1.5kg punnet of tiny cherry tomatoes individually and drying each one with kitchen paper before placing them in a bowl that he keeps on his desk. He wouldn't step aside for a second so I could fill the kettle. I had to wait for him to finish.

I have another colleague who uses a timer to ensure his tea bag has been stewing in his mug for exactly five and a half minutes before he removes it.

Also MIL won't drive more than 56mph because any faster isn't as economic apparently. They've got a tiny car and I can just imagine them getting beeped at on the motorway by giant lorries.

If we go out for a meal FIL takes all our leftovers home to heat up for himself at a later date...a good meal out can last him about a week apparently.

One time I wanted to take my pizza home but FIL had already claimed it!!

Never met such a well to do couple who scrimp and save as much as they do. Must be why they're so well off in the first place. The central heating goes on in their house only on special occasions "as a treat".

My late mother insisted on washing up the washing up bowl, drying it and putting it away in the washing up bowl cupboard. This happened several times a day as everything was washed up immediately after use, even a cup and saucer. ( obviously no mugs as they were common)

My DF asked the staff in McDonalds for cutlery.

MIL will only eat food from posh supermarkets even if it is exactly the same brand - she can taste the difference if it is sold in a different shop apparently. Although she never seemed to notice when I bought her branded items from Lidl and put them in a posh carrier bag to save her money.

My DM used to always complain about faulty electrical items - totally unrelated of course to her unwillingness to read the instructions to work them properly.

DM also had a mobile that she never used it was only for "emergencies" and she refused to make calls as they were "too expensive" - not as expensive though as losing over £40 in credit as she hadn't turned the mobile on for 2 years,

We also have relatives who insist on meticulously organising family parties to the extent of a written school-type timetable in the hall detailing activities, mealtimes and chores for each person. No sitting and chatting with a cup of tea allowed.

My parents never remove the plastic covering from new remote controls. We have to press the buttons through the plastic

I watched MIL wash a tomato once of AN HOUR - under a running tap (which I kept switching off) she would look at it with great interest every 10 minutes and the put it under the running tap. FFS
every vegetable had to be perfect and huge chunks cut off if they weren't. She wouldn't eat home grown veg as they were 'dirty'

Everything had to be soaked before washing up - so there were always cups and glasses full of water. Even glasses used for water would be sat soaking.

This has been fantastic kept me up reading well into the night. Pil do most of this and I refuse to go to their house now as when ds was a couple of weeks old they put his Moses basket on the dining table with a painters sheet underneath in case he made a mess! Don't get me started....

Never been so sad to get to the end of a thread. Thank u all for the hours of entertainment.

This thread is gold