Omg such anality from pil. Come and share your anal behaviour stories (lighthearted)

My ILs are mild compared to some of you guys.

FIL insists on sending us warning emails of current scams going on by phone or email, totally weird things always perpetrated by someone on a country I have never heard of who are apparently targeting people just like me!! Like I have a special demographic called thick as shit.

Food at their house is always Luke warm and sliced or chopped very small/thinly, it's like they are preparing themselves for the retirement home. And there is never enough, DH could easily finish off what they cook for all of us put together.

FIL makes soup with leftovers (of which there are few) and will think nothing of scraping what you didn't eat into an old ice team carton to mush up into soup once they get enough detritus to do so. Chicken bone and half eaten roast potato soup anyone. They even freeze leftover Chinese takeaway!

He also uses one tea bag for about 4 cups of tea and you can't fox him by having coffee as that always comes in a shade of very pale gnats wee, I think it's a granule a cup!

And they don't have big glasses so you have to make yourself about 6 drinks to the equivalent of one you would have at home or try and quench your thirst with the lukewarm water/tea concoction.

Oh and you don't eat certain things together, god the issue when I even thought of serving carrots and fish at the same meal!

I do love them dearly though and think they just don't like waste. Mind you the hovering when you are doing anything, knowing in their mind they are horrified you are doing it that way but are far too middle class to comment gets to me and the time when a tap had been dripping and he taped a ruler to the side of dh's old baby bath to show me just how much water was being wasted did do my head in.

I am already storing up barminess from this thread to use to persecute DCs when I am old.

I'd just like to lob THIS particular hand grenade into the thread.

People who know how to pack. Suitcases, cars for the holiday...

:o

Without trying to put a downer on anyone, please make sure you make a fuss of the pernickety old bastards.

I treasure every moment that I wasted, moaning about wee quirks & idiosyncrasies that my parents had.

They are gone now, & by fuck, it's a quiet life without them

they will be recalled in so many ways in so many generations to come though.

Some of their daft wee habits are the things that I treasure the most now.

Haha sarnies. Sarongs repeat on me.

It's the god-honest truth, Bluey, it made her 'feel as if you wanted me gone'.

YY to MIL ironing the porcelain dolls' dresses. And everything in sight. Also to the 18 hour picnic prep for a couple of sarongs and a bag of Seabrooks. Why? WHYYYY???

See, you can lower the standards and use a sippy cup next time .

Can't believe the face flannel flowers though.

Yes, Bluey, it has a spout and everything... :)

I once had to buy MIL a £20 bunch of flowers (thanks, DH, for the suggestion, and your support in this extremely trifling matter) because I made her cry by repositioning her face flannel in the bathroom. That is no word of an exaggeration.

Surely not by the standards of this thread, Yoko, as you've at least bothered to put it in a jug.

Btw, on a slightly different note, I thought I was the only living person who served gravy in a measuring jug. Is this the new benchmark for slatternly shortcomings? :)

This thread has me convinced that DH is a bigamist and married to all of you lot. My extremely JeanAndDave MIL serves Sunday fry-up on the world's tiniest side plates resulting in beanjuice level: critical (woe betide you if the beanjuice should spill over the side of the miniature plate, it's an exercise in extreme cutlery control). She also told me that I should 'control DH's portions'. I'm sorry, I wasn't aware it was 1955, now where did I put that pin money...? I could go on... For hours.

My ils are a bit JeanAndDave too.

Mil, up until a few months ago would put my children in pull up nappies for bed when they stayed at her house despite the fact she has a waterproof sheet on the bed. They are 5 and 4 and have (between them) only wet the bed twice and they were ill at the time. She also only recently stopped putting the 4 year old in a high chair! They still both must wear a bib at meal times in case they spill anything on their clothes which wouldnt matter anyway as she washes all their clothes at the end of the day even when they dont really need washing. She also washes their jackets and SHOES every time they go to her house (which is usually at least once week).

When cooking chicken she leaves it cooking for an extra 20 mins on purpose so that it is dry as fuck cooked properly but will only make enough gravy for a dessert spoonful each.

I could go on... :o

What a fabulously entertaining thread this is! Has had me laughing out loud.

However, I confess to embracing many of these quirky idiosyncrasies myself! It must be an age thing, as I used to laugh heartily at the daft behaviors of my parents and in-laws but now find myself turning into them! Now I'm wondering if my DD and DDil might be among the posters on here!

I tease my PIL when they come to stay (which is often, bless them, I love them dearly) that I have have to get in extra tea, white wine and washing up liquid as they use all three in roughly equal amounts. DFIL can get through a bottle of washing up liquid in a 4 day stay. He doesn't drink it, obviously, that's what the tea and white wine is for.

This thread has brightened my insomnia no end!

My Dad does the holiday itinerary thing and is famous amongst my friends for the clipboard that contained all the lists to do with my wedding. But I think I'll suggest a laminator after shesariver's post. He would love one of those.

I meal plan (though deviation is permitted), make lists and holiday itineraries and my CD collection is alphabetised. Things go back In Their Proper Place. I am 37. My future children-in-law are in for a right treat.

Fil isn't bad at all compared to these stories but his washing up technique drives me mad! He places all importance on the rinsing of the soap suds off the dishes, so items get a quick dunk in the bubbles, including a whole handful of cutlery, then meticulously rinsed.

My parents are also very laid back but are unable to get out of the house before 3pm, even if they need to get somewhere, they have to have their after lunch cup of tea first and then partly do the washing up. Trying to get a meal to fit in with dcs early routines is a challenge.

About the coffin-sized freezers ... my parents have these. They have three freezers and two fridges, all full size. Two are referred to as 'the spare fridge' and 'the spare freezer' but are used at Christmas (when, as everyone knows, the shops shut for a full month and it requires the tactical skill of Wellington at Waterloo to feed a family).

There are only the two of them in the house. I'm thinking stewed apple from 1998 is going to be the least of it! My mum still has food colouring from when she made birthday cakes when we were little.

I hate to break it to you Lily, but did you know that cheese actually comes in its own wrapping - especially the resealable cheddar blocks - so you don't need to? It just takes space!

Mind you - I have to re-write the shopping list in the order it is on the shelves, and get all discombobulated when they move stuff...

... did I mention that I'm only in my 30s? There's no hope for me is there? :(

I have a cheese tupperware fridge box! It is normal, healthy behaviour!!!

OMG I think my DP is turning into one of these.... some I have managed to train him out of - like unplugging the TV aerial every time we stay overnight somewhere (but he trusts it when we are at work eh?)

But he:

Has a little book in the glove compartment for noting down journeys, petrol, mileage etc
Has a set way of doing the washing up that takes 3 times as long and tells me off for running the hot tap filling up the bowl for rinsing as I go.
Insists on thoroughly washing and de-labelling all recycling - will even dig out stuff that I have just rinsed to peel labels off and wash properly.
Saves every damn screw/nail/inch long piece of wood etc etc in separate jam jars in the garage
Saves the cardboard boxes for electrical appliances in the loft for when we move. I have at least managed to persuade him to collapse these now though.
Keeps all his most ancient and holey T-shirts for sleeping in. FFS just buy a new T shirt.
Has a special "cheese" tupperware box in the fridge
Takes a bottle of tap water everywhere he goes.

Bless him. I do luffs him - we are both mad in our separate ways (I am a slightly OCD -offically diagnosed BTW - anxiety disorder germophobe who drives him potty with my cleaning and handwashing and use-by-date-checking)
We are truly a match made in heaven, but I pity our poor offspring-in-laws to be!

Oh and we're both in our 30s! So not necessarily an age thing.

HyvaPaiva loving the holiday itinary list, can so identify with this as this is what we get from MIL and step FIL, really its just him. Full of boring exact details to of exactly what they plan to do on each and every day of their holiday...e.g 0830 breakfast 0900 return to hotel room 0930 read 1000 go out a walk...and so it goes on, for 7 days! And the piece de resistance - he laminates the damn thing!

My ILs are crazy. Lovely but crazy.

They check the prices of everything at every supermarket and visit about 7 different different shops to make their savings. Whenever we point out that they spend more on fuel and parking than they save they just look perplexed.

The day a visit is over the bed is stripped and washing is on less than five minutes after getting up. Nothing to make you feel unwelcome. But tidying up is the most important thing in MiL's life. She almost had a panic attack on New Year's Day after taking down all the Christmas decorations when realising that she still had the Christmas tablecloth on.

Faffing is a big thing in PILs lifes. I can't understand why everything takes so long. Lunch at 1pm will go on at 7am. Why does it take so long to cook a bit of meat and a few veggies?

Ooooh, have just remembered that PILs will dismantle their hob and clean the inside of the oven till it gleams after every single meal, but they think I have OCD because I like to wash soft fruit before I eat it.

To be fair, their cooker is bloody lovely.

DMIL has the post war child thing about ensuring the cupboards and freezer are full....every day she lists out loud what's available....a looooong list which she stores in her head.

"There's shrimp and steak, white fish and some frozen mince....there's bacon and eggs and a tupperware bowl of leftover hamburgers....cheese and cereal....I might buy more cereal, there's only 2 boxes in the larder..."

It does DH's head in but I listen with glee for some reason...she also has at least three of everything such as soap powder and boxes of loo roll.

my parents have been gone a while but I've just woken up giggling because I've remembered the milk jugs.
They always kept one out on the kitchen counter, next to the kettle, whatever the weather. Dad would fill it up when he got up at stupid o'clock every morning and it would be used throughout the day.
Nobody was allowed to get milk out of the fridge because that involved opening the fridge door and would waste electricity.
No wonder I stopped eating cereal and started taking my coffee black in my early teens.