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Original poster

For the first time ever DH & DS went off to do the xmas food shop......I am still laughing...

241 replies

Megglevache · 24/12/2012 13:06

...his parting words
"don't look worried Mrs MLV...I got this"

he spent almost £300

he bought amoungst other things
12 pack of kitchen roll
24 luxury toilet rolls- the type that are about 12 tog and will block up our feeble pipes
A partridge
8 different olives
Masses and masses of lemon jelly???
Premier Champagne (he's teetotal) I drink Cava
Popcorn (with sour cream and chives Heresy
the whole biscuit aisle
a farking Heston Blumenthrill cake (£25!!!???)
a crate of festive cheeses
8lb gammon
salmon
bike helmet
fancy bubble bath
posh candles (that smell)

Please share with me tales of bizarre shopping to take off the edge..Grin

PS.. I am still laughing every time I open up the fridge...(which has hardly anything in it)

OP posts:
Original poster
Megglevache · 24/12/2012 15:32

I'm loving "shops sizing has gone all squiff" husband in denial :-)
These duck eggs are called "posh birds"

OP posts:
strumpetpumpkin · 24/12/2012 15:30

If I send dp to do a shop, he generally comes back with about a hundredquids worth of exotic yoghurts and GU desserts, more tropicana than we can fit in the fridge, some steak and a packet of pasta

Original poster
Megglevache · 24/12/2012 15:28

I promise later I will photograph...
I may be preoccupied setting up my pop up olive stall outside me house though :-)
pate
and the BEST...shampoo...
My dh has no hair....
"dammit, I thought this was bubble bath" More???

OP posts:
quirrelquarrel · 24/12/2012 15:26

I think my parents will have spent about £25 plus champagne on Xmas food!! they're buying salty nuts like there's no tomorrow though? i have no idea why> everywhere i look there's a new packet inc under the tree!

(typing one handed, piggy is all stretched out with his foot in the air and he's gone all heavy- most adorable sight ever)

snowflakehellokitty · 24/12/2012 15:26

no pear tree Wink

quirrelquarrel · 24/12/2012 15:21

bike helmet?? Grin

poor little guinny on my tummy's getting all shaken from my giggles Grin

Original poster
Megglevache · 24/12/2012 15:20

More Olives.....oh..these ones have been "tumbled" with fennel

What the fark...

OP posts:
Meglet · 24/12/2012 15:20

'Glad' to know other people can't use fancy toilet paper as it blocks the loo. I thought it was just my house, budget loo roll here or it gets stuck.

guanosoup · 24/12/2012 15:19

My lovely dh went to town this morning, we are now the proud owners of a chicken, a joint of pork, 2 pots of pea and spinach soup, some organic fiery ginger cordial,
and last but not least, a bottle of organic pure agave sweetener. I have no clue what we are to do with that...! Grin

On the other hand, we have no bread or cheese

QODRestYeMerryGentlemen · 24/12/2012 15:19

Oh bless him!

My dh went shopping with dd yesterday to get me a present and came back with cargo trousers, for him, that were too small.

Even though he's put on 2 stones he just can't accept that logically his hips have spread. The shops have changed their sizing ;)

LollipopViolet · 24/12/2012 15:19

A partridge?

Is he going to B&Q for the pear tree, then? Grin

Oh dear, I shouldn't laugh really as that's a LOT of money, but I am. Sorry. Blush

openerofjars · 24/12/2012 15:16

Aw, bless him. He's actually lugging a whole woolly mammoth back to the cave, isn't he? Grin

My DH is currently in the kitchen, being worried about an enormous ham... Man vs meat.

GirlsonFilm · 24/12/2012 15:15

Tea Cakes Xmas Grin - that gluten free seasonal treat pmsl.....but admire your calmness in the face of his (enthusiastic) Christmas madness

EuroShagmore · 24/12/2012 15:14

I'm loving this thread. I'm reading it out to Mr Euro and it is making him look practical!

Original poster
Megglevache · 24/12/2012 15:14

duck eggs

honestly...we have NEVER had duck eggs..
I'm going to have to photograph all this aren't I??? Or you'll not believe me...
Jumbo cashew nuts
mini cheddars
the biggest jar of gherkins I have ever held...I thought he may have won these in a competition along the way....

OP posts:
naughtycloud1 · 24/12/2012 15:13

like the festive cheese and champagne 25pounds for cakeShock gamon nice the rest Shock

SolidGoldFrankensteinandmurgh · 24/12/2012 15:13

I salute your attitude as well. I've never had to deal with this sort of thing myself but it's fun to watch...

Original poster
Megglevache · 24/12/2012 15:12

forgive typos...mayonaise not jumbo malaise...although Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
Megglevache · 24/12/2012 15:11

trying to do this in secret
that yuletide family favourite
Tea cakes

OP posts:
Original poster
Megglevache · 24/12/2012 15:07

ok jumbo malaise for prawn cocktail
but no prawns

OP posts:
Original poster
Megglevache · 24/12/2012 15:06

will type as he presents each clever purchase to me ...he is goes declaring "the non wheateater will not starve! wee wee

OP posts:
KeemaNaanAndCurryOn · 24/12/2012 15:05

That's hilarious!

I didn't even realise that Heston Blumental made cakes. You learn something new every day.

Original poster
Megglevache · 24/12/2012 15:04

will type as he presents each clever purchase to me ...he is goes declaring "the non wheateater will not starve! wee wee

OP posts:
merlottits · 24/12/2012 15:03

I have the opposite problem - a DH who always 'under' buys.

The BBQ where we remembered at the last minute that we hadn't bought any diet coke (20+guests). He can back with two cans.

He will work out the amount a person will probably eat/drink and reduce it by half and buy that.

I know where it comes from. The infamous 'meet the parents' meal. My soon-to-be PIL, my DS, SIL, BIL, DH and me sitting at the table.
One garlic baguette gets put on the table. TUCK IN mother-in-law commands...yeah right!

Original poster
Megglevache · 24/12/2012 15:01

he is back...!

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