what is the oddest thing someone has done when you have visited their house?

When I was about 15, we won't to my grandparents for New Year's Eve. They had invited another friend for dinner. Just after 11.30, grandparents announced they were going to bed. The other guest had to leave and given that he and a 45 min drive home, would have been sat in the car by himself at midnight.

I guess the message would be deleted if I suggested a connection between a religion invented by a science fiction author for personal gain that practices brainwashing and the behavioural trait personified by a colloquial term for masturbation.

So to avoid being deleted I'll avoid suggesting such a connection.

You obviously didn't read the "gawjuss" bit Stealth?

Bucharest you dated tom c. R.uise?

Supadupa That is terrible...

...to say those things!

That house sounds brilliant!

Now I've remembered the gawjuss man who took me home and opened his cupboard and got his scientology books out to show me. In the same cupboard were hundreds (I mean hundreds) of multi packs of paper tissues. I never did found out if there was a connection.

i once dated a man who invited me round to his place for tea. His room was the front room lounge and it was COVERED in sci-fi. I mean the ceiling was 'wallpapered' with boxes of star wars figurines...rows upon rows of them....how he stuck them on I will never know. At least one wall was floor to ceiling comics in boxes and the rest of the walls shelved with other stuff on them. the bed took central stage right in the middle of the room. Odd is not the word......

I dumped him after we went out to play pool and he asked me if his bum looked big in his leather trousers (he was a very big bloke!) and he wore a skull and cross bone bandana on his head. I beat him needless to say and when he asked me if he could call me his girlfriend and shouted NOOOOOO! and left.

This thread has been a god send during the multiple night time feeds! :-)

Donkey so true life is stranger than fiction.

GinPalace It took bloody ages! I've been reading it on and off for days!

My life is disappointingly sane at the moment, I am desperately trying to remember something to share. I'd make something up, but I couldn't make anything up half as weird as some of the posts on here.

At the end of their university course one of my sister's friends needed a hand getting all his stuff back to London from Glasgow as he didn't drive. My sister and her flat mate offered to share the driving of the van he'd hired.

They arrived in London at about 3am and helped him unload. He then showed them to the door , said thanks very much, have a safe drive back!!!!! I think they were too gobsmacked to protest and ended up sleeping in the van. They never spoke to him again.

RedRuby that is just beyond belief! Wow!

Donkey do you mean to say that after all that inspiration it hasn't jogged any dodgey visits memories. Wow! Lucky you for having such a sane life!! . Incidentally how long did it take you to read all... I keep dipping in as it's gone along but suspect I've lost entire days doesn't care I'm avoiding a crappy task

OMG, I can't believe I've made it to the end! Thanks for the bookmark info, by the way, that's really useful! (Can't believe it's not on by default though.)

I wish I had freakishly weird friends or family so I could join in the fun.

Good grief Ruby, no wonder she managed to scare off two husbands in quick succession - can you imagine being married into a family like that?

redruby - , just and - what a set of utter bastards. :( That poor woman (and you of course).

Miggsie - I don't mind people being obsessive about cleanliness IF they're prepared to do it themselves. IF they're not, then they can stick it where the sun don't shine! Cheeky mare, that one.

Tame compared to some

Many years ago, my then DP would announce that we were going to Cape Town or Durban and say "Its Ok, we will stay with X person".

Visit 1: Cape Town for a friends wedding. We arrive at the friends house - minimalist does not really describe his home, orange crate furniture etc but he was a sweet and gracious host and clearly didnt have a penny. Having driven for 14 hours to get there, I asked if I might have a bath. He said I could, but Id have to wait a while for the water to heat up. He then filled the cast iron tub with about 3 inches of cold water and plugged in an immersion heater - the kind you get at the bottom of a kettle? Or actually the kind you would plug into a car cigarette lighter thingie to make a cuppa on the go. Two hours later I had a barely luke warm bath brrrrr. The same immersion heater was to be used to make tea next morning. The wedding wasnt until noon, so had to stay all morning.

Visit 2: We worked nights, and we were invited to a new year party about an hour or so away. Friend would put us up. We finished work at 11:30ish and headed straight off to party. When we got there, naturally everyone was pissed, the hosts made us up a bed in the lounge and staggered off to bed. Their friend was still up drinking, we had a glass of wine, with WHitney Houston blaring on the stereo. He passed out with his eyes open, so we werent quite sure if he was still awake listening to the music or asleep or passed out. The tape was on a loop. DP wouldnt switch off tape because he thought it would be rude. At 4am I went and "slept" in the car, still hearing "i wanna dance with somebody" - Hate whitney now!

Visit 3: "We will stay with Mrs B" he announced. unknown to me, she was his ex's granny. His split with ex had not been amicable. WHat was he thinking? I spent a loooooong evening chit chatting with the old bird while the clock ticked and she answered all questions and attempts to chat in monosyllables with a catsbum face.

I never let my DP organise accommodation after that!

This is minor compared to the plain bonkers and possibly mentally ill types mentioned previously but...
Years ago, my lodger's girlfriend (who lived with her mum) would visit regularly and run her finger along bookshelves, or the mantelpiece, or the tops of door frames-and then show me the dust and huff in my face. She also used to stand in the kitchen with her hands on her hips and tut tut. I may add that the messiest person in the house by far was the lodger.

A few months later the lodger and she set up home, and it is going to be so much better and cleaner for him, apparently than my slothful housekeeping. I'd got sick of her snidey comments by this time and stopped socialising with her and her dust covered index finger being shoved in my face.

Fascinating appendix to this tale: I often saw the ex-lodger at work and one day, about 6 months after they had moved in together he lets slip that they are getting a cleaner, because his girlfriend had turned to him and said "I'm sick of cleaning this f*cking house".

A few months later than that he also lets slip that the agency cleaners "really aren't very good" and they had had so many cleaners he really thought it was a bad show there were not more reliable cleaners in the world. I nearly said that the cleaners probably left due to having a dusty index finger poked in their eye, but didn't.

Fed me pasta with cold, runny flavourless white sauce dumped on it, and then picked a child's poo off the carpet with bare hands.

In the same visit. I guess I should be glad it wasn't in the reverse order.

I can only repeat.

They were all fucking mad!

The last time I spoke to her was to tell her that my darling Dad was terminally ill and had a few short months to live.

Her reply was;

"You didn't send me a birthday card last week".

I had found out the week before that Dad was going to die.

Strange that I wasn't quite 'there' to get my head together to send her a card.

Like I said. Fucking MAD!

I can't believe you went back to visit her ruby.

WOW. Just WOW

I actually did a sharp intake of breath at that!!!!

That poor poor widow!! Did you go in after and give her a huge hug?????

No wonder she has seen off two husbands!!!

Poor Morag!!!

She didn't see the irony of invading Morags house to deliver the rebuke then!!!

Are you still friends with her or did Morag come back in the dead of the night and murder them all

Vivian and Gin

I felt for her - she had two marriages in quick succesion and she leaned on me.

After her second divorce she went to live with her parents on a remote farm in Scotland. The only neighbours were sheep farmers John and Morag (names changed to protect the innocent).

Her parents got friendly with John and Morag and and they were lovely people. Then John was diagnosed with cancer and died very quickly afterwards, it was all very sad and I was there as a visitor a week later.

My friend and her parents refused to attend the funeral as 'they don't do that sort of thing'.

When I was there Morag came round a week after the funeral sobbing and distraught and went to the only place she could walk to for solace. Her neighbours. Walked into friend's Dad's workshop looking for company and a comforting cup of tea and chat.

He went purple with rage and stormed into the house screaming "that his personal space had been violated and he will never be safe again".

My friend then went screaming into the recently widowed woman's house and basically told her at high volume "Did she realise what she had done! Violating my Dad's personal and private space and what was she thinking!!!! You selfish cow. He will never feel safe again etc etc" I heard this from the meadow I was standing in.

Then her Mum appeared and repeated the same to the new widow.

Her Father was a retired professor and her mother was a doctor. They were all fucking mad!!