Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mumsnet classics

Relive the funniest, most unforgettable threads. For a daily dose of Mumsnet’s best bits, sign up for Mumsnet's daily newsletter.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Only with Ocado...

258 replies

SoupDragon · 03/04/2012 09:33

"Today your order will be delivered by Jesus in the Cabbage van"

You don't get the son of god delivering groceries for just any supermarket.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
AlwaysInTheKitchenAtParties · 02/05/2020 16:31

(also always very late to the kitchen at parties)
Just wondering whether He delivered the Piece of Cod That Passeth All Understanding?

AlwaysInTheKitchenAtParties · 09/04/2020 17:12

I assume He would deliver the piece of cod that passeth all understanding?

ElfriqueTheSantaHelpingLizard · 11/12/2014 12:06

Are we going for a Christmas set this year? If so I've just had my shopping delivered by Joseph.
He was in the Onion van Xmas Grin

VivaLeBeaver · 19/04/2014 20:24

I saw my first ever Ocado van today (don't live in an Ocado delivery area). Was delighted to see it was a cabbage van and thought of this thread and couldn't stop giggling.

greymanu · 24/11/2013 16:13

Kofi in the Onion van; times are tough for the former Sec Gen of the UN.

Snog · 20/09/2013 06:22

checked my texts too...
no jesus but a couple of his disciples in the same cabbage van...Peter and Thomas
Grin

fishonabicycle · 19/09/2013 11:48

I've only just found this thread and am very disappointed I've never had Jesus. however, looking back through my texts, I did have Joseph in a courgette van in June. I've also had Anita in Cabbage, and Keith in Lemon, Kevin in Onion, Lionel in Apple and (pleasingly alliterative) Lee in Lemon. Disciples I have had include Paul in courgette, and John in Cabbage. Last week I had Christian (!) in Strawberry.

curlyclaz13 · 21/07/2013 22:38

I have ordered from ocado because of this thread. delivery due between 12-13 tomorrow no text yet to tell me is jesus is making an appearance.

plainjaney · 04/07/2013 20:20

A further resurrection....

Jesus has not appeared to me, which frankly isn't a huge surprise, however, a few weeks ago a new challenger to Jesus appeared in our area when my friend had a visit from...

Mac in the Apple Van!

Grin
ceeveebee · 29/09/2012 07:40

Omg I am so excited - I have just had a text from Ocado and today I have Jesus coming to me!!! In a courgette van this time though

Just had to resurrect this thread for that. No pun intended

Macchiato · 11/06/2012 15:43

Oooooh we're having "hank in his onion van" today

AncientsOfMuMu · 01/05/2012 09:18

Sat in a queue of traffic this morning, I was next to a Ocado van.

O the drivers door it said 'Constance Cabbage Van' sponsored by Ms L surname of Timsbury.

How cool is that! Grin

MandaHugNKiss · 27/04/2012 07:59

I think it's because they are The Way.

Charleymouse · 27/04/2012 00:06

Chocolate orange van sounds awesome. Well Terry very helpful got pwet through in the rain and not as hot as Damien but heyho (spookily heyho comes up as Bethleham on predictive text)! What is it with Ocado and their religious connections?

Original poster
SoupDragon · 26/04/2012 17:50

What a shame Terry wasn't in the chocolate orange van. [sigh]

OP posts:
Charleymouse · 26/04/2012 16:55

Terry in the onion van for me today!

Original poster
SoupDragon · 26/04/2012 11:33

Very disappointed to have had Billy in the Onion van this week. I mean he was on time and polite and everything but [meh].

Innocent is good. Did you corrupt him?

OP posts:
takeonboard · 26/04/2012 11:23

I just looked back through my Ocado texts and I seem to always have the Cabbage or Courgette van and I have never had Jesus sadly!

Charleymouse · 26/04/2012 11:15

MandaHugNKiss he did offer me dried figs, but I sent them back. Not sure what to take from that though.

Well waiting for todays text for tonights delivery. Will update later.

MandaHugNKiss · 25/04/2012 13:28

Well, just got today's txt: I have the cabbage van again... and again, it lacks Jesus. I'm expecting Lawrence. Larry. It's not even close!

MandaHugNKiss · 21/04/2012 17:53

Hmm, charley is it only me seeing some kind of irony in the antichrist Damien failing to deliver figs? After all, wasn't it the fig leaves Adam and Eve chose to cover up with once Damien's Dad had a word in Eve's shell like?

Maybe Damien has seen all the glory Jesus is getting here at Ocado and wants a bit of that action for himself?

And it stands to reason he was quite hot (hell puns aside) as his Dad was a very beautiful angel indeed.

emmanana · 21/04/2012 11:52

Christopher in Lemon Van rang last night to see if I wanted my 10-11pm order delivery (It's free then) at 9.30, as he was in the area, bless him, so I got an early night in bed with a book. Hope he got to finish early as well!

Charleymouse · 20/04/2012 22:30

Phew Armageddon averted.

Damien eventually arrived half an hour past delivery slot with my shopping nicely sorted in colour coded bags minus my fresh figs.
Not at all satanic looking quite hot in fact
Think will try to order again to see if we can reach the giddy heights of the son of God.

MandaHugNKiss · 20/04/2012 20:02

well, yes, it's an anagram of Satan V (the previous four incarnations failed, clearly...)

Good luck charleymouse - could be it's on your shoulders to head off armaggedon!

Charleymouse · 20/04/2012 19:36

Damien is running late as he has satnav failure OMG typing satnav predictive text tried to put in Satan. I am doomed aren't I?

Swipe left for the next trending thread