I pooed on my skirt at work today

Crying with laughter

DH once shit himself on a cliff in Corfu! We had climb down the cliff and walk back to the beach through the sea so he could wash it off.

Oh silverbay

skirt caught up in bad poo at work, namechange fail, not the best day eh?

TFIF

I have never told anyone this before.

In the early weeks of pg with dc1 I was feeling nauseaus but put it down to morning sickness rather than a bug. I was at work and thankfully alone when I felt the need to fart, unfortunately I followed through in my grey work pants and had to work very hard to stop. Mortified, I tied my coat around my waste and ran to the toilets and then straight to my car and drove home on a handy plastic bag to protect the seats. Phoned my manager on route home and thankfully had pg as an excude to just leave.

After dc1 was born I then had a heavy period and bled through onto a seat in our staff room. I noticed it when I stood up though no one else did. The stain is still there four years later!

I went to A&E in the middle of the night once with really bad norovirus, I thought I was dying.

Lucky me, I shat my pants in the waiting room.

lol crying laughing at some of the stories on here.

ggirl I am now crying with laughter!

hahaha love this thread
my mum nearly pooed herself in m&s
I found her standing still staring intently at nothing..i thought she's had a stroke or something ..until she whispered to me
'if i move i'm going to poo'

Oh this is too much info so early in the morning but...

I went shopping with my mum once, we where stood in line waiting to be served when my mum let out a huge loud fart. Everyone went silent. Then if that wasn't bad enough, mum tried to blame it on the strangers baby in front of us.

I am a bit at all the farting mothers in supermarkets...

If I may join in...
Before starting my shop in local Morrisons, my insides were rumbling a bit (the whole family had been suffering with flu and dodgy tums) so off I hurried to the store toilets, spotting a little old lady hurrying in ahead of me pretty fast. It was just me and the old dear in there, and we must have been suffering from similarily dodgy stomachs...
We dueted a chorus of farts, splats and smells, punctuated only by minutes of mortified silence... we both stayed in there for about 15 minutes, due in part I think to not wanting to come out and have to clap eyes on each other at the washbasins... At one point I even got a mad fit of the giggles, in the end I just waited til she left, and then went home!

it was the funniest thing I have seen in a long while ( aside from DH Almost doing the splits in the front room last week slipping on water spillage from DDs painting )

Marbles! My Mum spoke to (at a short distance) a tile salesman recently, turned away and took one step up the three steps and let rip! she said 'Oooops!' and carried on. It was quite loud. I wanted to run, but he'd have thought it was me didn't look back.

Lookover I am shaking with laughter here , the idea of anyone shimmying around the supermarket with tightly closed legs... it's just too much!

:o NoMoreMarbles :o

my mum did that in sainsburys a while back

she sneezed really loudly and then farted like a gun being fired! really loud and there was a man stood nearby who jumped with shock and gave her the most hilariously disgusted look and walked off i was a tiny bit close to pissing my pants laughing!

LOL. Don't feel as though I had a bad day now.......trumped long and loud in Tesco . I mean all the way down the aisle ....

i leaked (heavy period) all over the back of my dress at work a few weeks ago and had to wear my coat for the last 1.5 hours of my shift

my friend got poo all over the back of her pants when (so she says) a unknown colleague diarreah (sp) poo'ed all down the front of the toilet in work she came out of the loo sobbing and the cleaners were in there for AGES sorting it out and she went home (i secretly think she was caught short but was too to admit it...i wouldnt it if had happened to me!)

I cant get over the fact that you finished your shopping look!

I would have dumped the basket, legged it and then been forever confused when I realised I hadnt leaked!

...this has brought back bad memories from years and years and years ago...

I was shopping in a Supermarket - on the second day of a heavy period.....

Went round picking stuff up and tossing in my wire basket... then noticed that there was a long line of little red dots and dashes behind me...

Mortified - I closed my legs together very very tightly and shimmied around to hurriedly finish my shopping - the red dots were turning into long red lines the more I walked around ...

I was hoping that no-one would notice and mentally working out where the nearest public loo was...

Went to the check-out and the girl started wrapping my purchases until she got to meat that I had purchased - the packaging had split and the blood was all over the place....

as we're confessing I also did a shart at teh beginning if an 8hr train journey

Jelly, TMI alert, I believe you, I had a similar removal leak in my bathroom once.

Eww to poo story.

JellyBelly, something very similar happened to me when I was 15.

Having hellishly heavy period, was visiting friends of my parents. Realised I was leaking and got up from an armchair to see a big patch of blood. I quickly turned the seat cushion over and said nothing!

Still cringe about this now!

hahahaha @jellybelly you poor thing

i bled heavily all over a cream upholstered chair in a farkin restaurant!!!

Oh Hunny

jellybelly I'm so sorry but that has made really made me giggle out loud.
It's the sort of thing that happens to me !