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Original poster

Center Parcs & Anal sex

290 replies

shadyl · 16/01/2012 20:22

So for the past 4 years I've been badgering DH for us to go to Center Parcs. He's been reticent on account of it being 'naff' and 'like Butlins but with trees' I disagree but anyway...

Eventually we went to Center Parcs, Longleat over the Christmas period (it was great) and I noticed that he had packed a tube of KY but didn't think anything of it. So we get back home and he makes some silly joke about 'no bumfun' despite 'my promises'.

Now there is no way in hell anything is ever going up my back bottom so I questioned what he meant (assuming he was joking). And he said that "according to Mumsnet" Center Parcs =anal sex. Apparently I had told him this over 4 years ago.

I have no memory of this link between Center Parcs and anal. Can someone confirm that there is a Center Parcs/anal meme in the same vein as nice ham?

Anyway, I got the hump.
He claims he was joking and made it all up because he thought I would find it funny
It's all too weird and I'm still a bit offended. Can't tell if I'm being oversensitive and it really was all a joke or whether he really did think that bum-business was on the menu.

OP posts:
Zorra · 17/01/2012 20:52

Maybe he figured that as he had finally done something you desperately wanted after four years of badgering you might return the favour?

So, so hopeful Grin

weevilswobble · 17/01/2012 20:50

Hello Elephantsandmiasmas. You didnt reply!?.........

fridakahlo · 17/01/2012 20:50

I've been howling with laughter and tears in my eyes!

weevilswobble · 17/01/2012 20:49

Funniest thread i've read. Really laugh out loud!

LineRunner · 17/01/2012 20:24

I mean, what are the chances?

Tomorrow, Professor Brian Cox is leading a 'turn off the lights' night, and a discussion of the possibility of alien sexual experiments life.

Or loife, as Dara would chortle.

Sparkletastic · 17/01/2012 20:22

Just when I think I should cut back on MN I fall in love all over again....

caramelwaffle · 17/01/2012 20:19
Grin
LineRunner · 17/01/2012 20:15

Professor Brian Cox is currently on about black holes, for those with a low fnaaarrr threshold.

PlentyOfPubeGardens · 17/01/2012 20:06

DS (looking over my shoulder): why are you reading about Center Parcs? Are we going there?
Me (stifling giggles): no ...
DS (who went once with DSis's family): we should go, it's good. It's not like Butlins, you can do what you want. You're not persuaded into anything.

iklboo · 17/01/2012 20:04

Heard the theme for their next ad is going to be 'Bummer Loving' Grin

noluck · 17/01/2012 19:51

Oh yes please Mrs. M get the next
flight into Switzerland :)

SpecialBranch · 17/01/2012 19:04

Thanks SDTG, that was me.

I rather assumed it was in Classics but I couldn't be arsed I was too busy at the time to check Grin

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 17/01/2012 17:43

For the poster who asked - My DH says he wants to take me up the OXO tower for Valentines Day.... It's a classic.

MrsMicawber · 17/01/2012 16:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

noluck · 17/01/2012 16:36

Dear beloved Mners, I have just splattered the computer screen with my tea...haven't laughed so much in ages....love this thread...still sniggering about "parcs, parcs...."

Docbunches · 17/01/2012 16:28

Willybreeder, I too have recently heard this expression used on TV by a female comedian on some panel show or something.

At the time I remember thinking, she must have got that line from a Mumsnet discussion. I'm going to rack my brain to remember who said it......

WibblyBibble · 17/01/2012 15:58

Kreecher, if you don't bring your own bumsex partner, there are apparently "reasonably priced" alternatives available on site (no actual prices listed). They even have a 'watersports' section in case bumsex isn't exotic enough.

MrsMicawber · 17/01/2012 15:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ElephantsAndMiasmas · 17/01/2012 15:53

This is just marvellous.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 17/01/2012 15:32

I was considering taking DD for a couple of days.
If DH isn't with us, who'll do my bumsex?

newmum001 · 17/01/2012 14:44

I adore the title of this thread!

newmum001 · 17/01/2012 14:44

I adore the title of this thread!

Portofino · 17/01/2012 14:38

I think CP lends itself to trauma. I have been once - in Belgium - and was stood naked in the middle of the living room with the patio doors open, as you do - we backed on the lake so weren't overlooked.....

I looked up to find a whole family on a pedalo staring at me aghast! Shock Those poor children.....

LadyGahGah · 17/01/2012 14:19

Maybe Centre Parcs needs re-named to "A Little off Centre Parcs" Grin

Fab thread

Seona1973 · 17/01/2012 14:14

from the above link:

moondog Sat 25-Jul-09 16:23:27

CP sounds utterly utterly hideous.
I would rather have bum sex with Keny Ball than endure days of archery and tricycle riding in a walled camp.