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Original poster

to get disproportionately angry when songs do not make sense

564 replies

WTAF · 14/12/2011 21:44

In the car today, radio on, and they start playing All Around The World by Lisa Stansfield. Instantly I felt the rage creeping up.

'Been around the world and I, I
I can't find my baby,
I don't know why, why he's gone away '

YES YOU FUCKING DO, LISA! Allow me to refer you to your own words, not 30 seconds ago, when you said (and I quote):

'We had a quarrel, and I let myself go
I said so many things, things he didn't know
And I was oh, oh so bad'

And then, and then, LISA, you go on to say

'I did too much lying, wasted too much time'

So you do know, you know exactly why he's gone away, so you should just STFU and concentrate on finding him to apologise. Not singing that bullshit trying to make us feel sorry for you, when clearly it is all YOUR FAULT.

I feel better for that. Anyone else?

OP posts:
filipolarbear · 15/12/2011 06:51

"If I had myself a flying giraffe, I'd have one in a box with a window" stereophonics, saw upthread about someone's dh changing song lyrics.... thanks to my dh it will now always be "last Christmas I gave you my heart, but the very next day, you said you were gay....."

LtXmasEve · 15/12/2011 06:38

Ahh I can answer the 'Relax, don't do it' question.

It's don't relax, (don't relax if you want to 'finish')

...and that's straight from the horses mouth - my brother actually asked Holly Johnson!

EmmaBemma · 15/12/2011 06:08

Brilliant OP. Shades of Stewart Lee.

Kanye West's "Golddigger" - "Now I ain't saying she's a gold digger"...OK Kanye, so what seems to be the problem? "...but she ain't messing with no broke niggas". Well, in that case you ARE saying she's a gold digger, Kanye; that's exactly what you're saying, in this line and in the rest of the song. So don't be coy.

This isn't an example of a song that doesn't make sense, but Paul McCartney's "Live and Let Die" always makes me cross. I usually scorn grammar pedantry, but how could he not have noticed the idiotic extra "in" that messes up the line "this ever changing world in which we live in"? If it was a scanning problem, he could have just made "live" have an extra syllable, thus "li-ive", which is a bit rubbish, I grant you, but at least makes sense.

Sargesaweyes · 15/12/2011 02:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

piprobincomesbobbobbobbinalong · 15/12/2011 01:53

What about Shakira's small and humble breasts?

Sargesaweyes · 15/12/2011 01:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

xyfactor · 15/12/2011 01:17

Sugarhill gang gobbledygook :)

i said a hip hop the hippie the hippie
to the hip hip hop, a you dont stop
the rock it to the bang bang boogie say up jumped the boogie
to the rhythm of the boogie, the beat

Absolute nonsense x 1000.

ZombieMonkeyBrains · 15/12/2011 00:46

For cheese - please say you mean Richard Cheese. He's awesome and makes stupid songs brilliantly funny, in a lounge style. He was particularly fun at Sonisphere :)

WeThreeKingsOfMardyBra · 15/12/2011 00:35

Haircut 100 - worst filler lyrics ever:

Where do we go from here?
Is it down to the lake, I fear.

Ay ay ay ay ay ay.
Ay ay ay ay ay ay ay ay...

FoxyRoxy · 15/12/2011 00:21

Melpomene you're spoiling it! I'm going with dick cheese.

helendigestives · 15/12/2011 00:16

"Do they know it's Christmas time?"

Well, that depends on how indoctrinated they were by colonisation and the Christian missionaries, doesn't it?

WORST SONG EVER MAKES ME SO ANGRY ARRRRGH

RealLifeIsForWimps · 15/12/2011 00:01

Ain't no hollaback (sp) girl? Excuse me?

I think it means, "if you yell obscenities at me in the street, I'm not going to retaliate verbally. Let's just have a fight and sort it out now."

thisonehasalittlecar · 15/12/2011 00:01

How about the Spice Girls' "Yellow man in Timbuktu". Wrong, and a bit offensive too.

turquoisetumble · 14/12/2011 23:58

And another thing

Beyonce, love. It probably doesn't suck to be him right now. He's probably really happy and getting on with his life, in fact he is probably well rid of the psycho/stalker who goes on and on and fucking on about how over him she is. She's so over him, she writes a song about it and screeches it to the world.

Melpomene · 14/12/2011 23:55

The 'better in broken heels' line references a quote that "Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did only backwards and in high heels." It's just taking it one step further ie even handicapped by broken heels I'm still better than you.

And 'cheese' can also mean money.

turquoisetumble · 14/12/2011 23:53

God I found my spiritual home. My brattish lovely kids insist on listening to Capital, which has a speciality in songs with banal, senseless lyrics.

Present bug bear is Mr Bruno Mars:

Is it the look in your eyes
or is it this dancing juice
Who cares babe
I think i wanna marry you.

Well, firstly, I think Mr Mars would be well advised to get pre-nup, secondly, that's a really shit proposal and thirdly, just fuck off.

Also, Labrinth and Tinie, why would you throw bombs at an earthquake?

FoxyRoxy · 14/12/2011 23:49

Diddy's "rap" from the Mario Waynans song I don't wanna know contains the lines And I don't wanna let you leave, Can't say I didn't let you breathe, Gave you extra cheese , put you in the SUV

Cheese on toast? Dick cheese?

Melpomene · 14/12/2011 23:46
by Insane Clown Posse:

"Fucking magnets, how do they work?
And I don't wanna talk to a scientist
Y'all motherfuckers lying, and getting me pissed"

It strikes me that if you want to know how a fucking magnet works then talking to a scientist would be a good way to find out.

squarehat · 14/12/2011 23:45

Do it even better in broken heels

Set fire to the rain

Theres more I'm sure I'll be back, I find myself shouting at the radio quite often!

nokissymum · 14/12/2011 23:43

tremolo did you "a la TLC" ?

ImpOfThePerverse · 14/12/2011 23:41

Gwen Stefani is one who comes out with all sorts of nonsense that I probably could make sense of if I was prepared to google it but I can't be bothered.

Ain't no hollaback (sp) girl? Excuse me?

TremoloGreen · 14/12/2011 23:36

I don't mind if lyrics are deliberately abstract, but not if they're crap, a la des'ree.

Also:
"I don't want no scrubs, a scrub is a guy who can't get no love from me"

Not only is that dire, it's a tautology. Sort it aaat.

Melpomene · 14/12/2011 23:29

ah I see now (sort of!)

skrumle · 14/12/2011 23:23

Grin was laughing at the eating toast post when my H came by. he read the OP and then declared - "I love people our age, they're so grumpy".

GreenIceAndChristmasHam · 14/12/2011 23:22

"Take a loo-ook down the railtrack, from Miami to Canada"

Um no. I'm pretty sure you'd still only be looking at Miami

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