to get disproportionately angry when songs do not make sense

Re Bowie's impenetrable lyrics, I used to idolise him and think I didn't understand it all because I just wasn't sophisticated enough. Then I saw an interview where he explained that he was into William Burroughs' cut-up technique, so he would write words down, then cut them up and rearrange them in random order.

Aha.

Sounds pretentious I know, but he's still bloody brilliant.

*And another thing

Beyonce, love. It probably doesn't suck to be him right now. He's probably really happy and getting on with his life, in fact he is probably well rid of the psycho/stalker who goes on and on and fucking on about how over him she is. She's so over him, she writes a song about it and screeches it to the world.*

YY!!

It's slightly worrying how much that song annoys me...

"I wannid you bad, but I'm so troo wit dat..."

Well clearly you're FAR from over him. You're devoting a large portion of your wedding day to singing about him. Does your husband-to-be realise just how obsessed you still are with your ex? Hmm?

Now if songs deliberately don't make sense, that's fine... (see Nirvana/Pixies/ Smashing Pumpkins/Ride/Bob Dylan) I quite like "You might think he loves you for your money, but I know what he really loves you for - it's your brand new leopard-skin pillbox hat"

However, some songs are just odd. 50 Cent's "Come give me a hug/ You'll end up getting drunk" a) doesn't actually rhyme, and b) how, exactly? Giving someone a hug and becoming intoxicated aren't usually linked.

This thread is priceless...

What was that song that went something like
I would rather go blind
Than lose your love.

BLIND ??? REALLY ???
Grrr

Haven't read it all so apologies it's been mentioned, but... Eurythmics "Missionary Man" ? Really?

My mother told me good, my mother told me strong
She said be true to yourself and you can't go wrong
But there's just one thing you must understand
You can fool with your brother
But don't mess with a missionary man."

So incest is fine, but don't shag a priest??!

ridiculously funny cartoon about Des'ree

The way the drama and desperation conjured up in Snow Patrol's Run
gets trivialised towards the end with "Even if it's just for a few days".

And as for "All I want is to find an easier way/To get out of our little heads" ... Eh? It always leaves me with the impression that Gary was in a hurry to get to the pub "Hang on, just got to finish off these lyrics - yeah, that'll do. Coming, lads!"

It beats me how people can ruin a masterpiece in this way.
www.songlyrics.com/snow-patrol/run-lyrics/

Stealing Cake to eat the Moon........What the fuck is that all about then ...i think everyone was stoned in the 80's :)

I used to think this line was deeply flawed and annoying but then thought "Hold on - maybe they're singing '... if this ever changing world in which we're livin'' - surely they wouldn't get away with such a bad grammatical error?"

I wish someone would ask P. McCartney and clear it up once and for all.

What was the one that went:

"Sometimes the snow comes down in June" ... yeah well maybe on a mountain in New Zealand

"Sometimes the sun goes round the moon" ... not in this solar system mate. And I suspect not in any.

That Bonio is an arse.

A star
Lit up like a cigar
Strung out like a guitar
Maybe you can educate my mind

Explain all these controls
Can't sing but I've got soul
The goal is elevation

A mole
Digging in a hole
Digging up my soul now
Going down, excavation

I and I in the sky
You make me feel like I can fly
So high
Elevation

Elevation by U2.

Laziest Lyrics Ever. Rhyming mole with hole, sky with fly. Wow, Bono, you da man.

God I hate U2.

I very much doubt that Mariah Carey would be perfectly happy with no actual presents.

Agree about that All Saints one; "a few questions that I need to know"

creepy Christmas song lyrics

"Have yourself a merry little christmas. It may be your last"

Sample lyric from 'The Revealing Science of God (Dance of the Dawn)' by Yes:

Dawn of thought transferred through moments of days undersearching earth
Revealing corridors of time provoking memories
Disjointed but with purpose
Craving penetrations offer links with the self instructor sharp and tender love as we took to the air a picture of distance.

Craving penetrations?!

Tiger, if it makes you feel any better I think he may have sung "in this crazy world in which we're living.

I like to think so anyway.

Modern Love, another Boiwe favourite!

I know when to go out
And when to stay in
Get things done
I catch a paper boy
But things don't really change
I'm standing in the wind
But I never wave bye-bye

Ok then, that clears that up

Unlike Coldplay who are also nice, educate middle-class boys whose music happens to stink.

Most of David Bowie's lyrics are random.
Love them all the same.
If the opening poster really wants to go off her head, she should listen to a band called Yes's lyrics. Oh dear. Love the band as I do, those words make listen sense.
Oh and of course Pink Floyd know that the grammar is off! Jeez, they're nice, educated middle-class boys fgs and they're a bloody great band, too.

It's on America's tortured brow
That Mickey Mouse has grown up a cow
Now the workers have struck for fame
'Cause Lennon's on sale again

See the mice in their million hordes
From Ibiza to the norfolk broads
Rule Britannia is out of bounds
To my mother, my dog, and clowns

I love Bowie but even I struggle to try to justify life on Mars lyrics!!

Sorry, but I have to stick up for Alanis Morisette here. If you were hunting for a knife and came across ten thousand spoons during your search then I think that could be classed as ironic (because of the the sheer quantity of the fecking spoons).

I agree, however, that rain on your wedding day (along with most of the other examples) is simple bad luck.

And what about 'I can't see me loving nobody but you / for all my liiiiife'. Aside from the grammatical itchiness, I always think: so you can imagine loving someone for a shorter period of time than your lifespan?? Not very romantic...

Oh yeah -

"Do they know it's Christmas time at all?"

Probably not, and why should they, they're mostly not Christians.

Someone mentioned you and I/you and me - according to S Club 7 (Heaven) usage is dependent on which one rhymes with the preceding line:
"Underneath the sky there's a heaven for you and I....
There's an energy between you and me..."

And as for New York
"Concrete jungle where dreams are made of"
Eh?

Surprised to see no Pixies on here. I never understand their lyrics (but then I was never a hardcore fan, I bet there are websites devoted to the semiotics of Pixies lyrics).

What, for example, has cement got to do with the Caribou?
???

Rihanna and her fecking song about cheating

'I don't wanna do this anymore'

THEN STOP

Tracy Thorne's one about Missing You sets me off too - she misses him like the desert misses the rain. BUT THE DESERT NEVER HAD THE RAIN SO HOW CAN IT MISS IT? Gah.

However this effort below is the all time winner for me. This shite was a hit in Holland this year - the singer is Milow, he's Belgian and has clearly taken some form of narcotic (or is an actual serial killer):

I wish you smelled a little funny
Not just funny really bad
We could roam the streets forever
Just like cats but we'd never stray
I sometimes wish you were a mermaid
I could raise you in the tub at home
We could take a swim together
On weekly day trips to the bay

Oh you and me
It would be only you and me
Oh you and me
It would be only you and me

I wish you were a little bigger
Not just big but really fat
Doors you would no longer fit through
In my bed you would have to stay
I often wish that you had feathers
I'd keep you in a giant cage
All day long I'd sit and watch you
I'd sing for you and that would be okay

People say there are plenty of fish
In the sea, baby, all I do is wish

I wish you were a little slower
Not just slow but paralyzed
Then I could plug you into a socket
So you could never run away
I really wish that you were smaller
Not just small but really really short
So I could put you in my pocket
And carry you around all day

The mind boggles.

Don't know if it's already been brought up but Red Hot Chilli Peppers 'Other Side' drives me bonkers...

'I don't, I don't believe it's bad / slit my throat, that's all I ever'

All I ever WHAT???? Finish your sentences you lanky-haired strangely attractive knobhead.