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Original poster

WWYD? The Saga of the Family Tuna

361 replies

PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 27/09/2011 19:43

Bit longwinded but anyone who bears with me can have Wine and Thanks
DD has a toy caterpillar named Sydney Tuna, she liberated him from a car boot sale when she was just gone 2 and has adored and worshipped him ever since.
Last Christmas Santa brought his mummy, Mrs. Mabel Tuna, to live with us. She had missed Sydney since he went to seek his fortune, so had written to Santa to ask him to find Sydney, and Santa gave her a lift to our house on his sleigh. Cue rejoicing and carolling and so on....
DD now informs me that this Christmas, Mrs T and Sydney are writing jointly to Santa to find Mr. Tuna, who rejoices in the name Miguel apparently, and is in the army, fighting for the peaceloving resistance caterpillars who want to stop the slaughter between the marmite and the maple syrup factions I kid you not AND I kept a straight face wile DD told me all this
So... and if you're still with me, a thousand thanks... I can lay my hands on a caterpillar identical to Mrs. Tuna, but how can I make him look like he's been liberated from the army/prisoner of war camp/somewhere else suitable to have kept him away for a long time? I thought about him having been kidnapped by Pirates to explain where he's been all these years, and that was when DD came out with the stuff about the army... any suggestions? DD is 9 and I think this could be the last year for Santa for her, we've had some pointed questions that I have so far lied my way out of managed by the skin of my teeth, so I want to do Mr. Tuna's homecoming right...

OP posts:
purplepidjinawoollytangle · 29/09/2011 13:30

Excellent Grin

What shall I use to improvise a harness???

SayCoolNowSayWhip · 29/09/2011 13:29

Best. Thread. Ever.

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 29/09/2011 13:06

I think we can be either need as long as we don't actually take sides, but just state our determination to Stop the War... apparently it goes on right under our noses, in the bushes, as we pass and we never see a thing!

OP posts:
Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 29/09/2011 13:04

Do use the tablecloth purple- it will be improvised - stolen from the Commandants washing line in the dead of night a la the A Team and demonstrate Miguel's ingenuity and determination to Make It Home no matter what Grin And it will be "toy" so the DCs won't think of actually launching anything each other with it hopefully

OP posts:
needanewname · 29/09/2011 13:03

I love this thread. So pleased that I'm not the only one who will do silly things at Christmas. Am very jealous of your imagination though!

Can I vote for the syrup as I hate marmite or does that make me an enemy now?

stealthsquiggle · 29/09/2011 12:51

or the real deal?

purplepidjinawoollytangle · 29/09/2011 12:50

Oh yes! I have the perfect blue flowery table cloth that would make an excellent pair of bloomers and then parachute!

What do you think, Pombear?

stealthsquiggle · 29/09/2011 12:48

How about 4 handkerchiefs sewn together?

Alwaysworthchecking · 29/09/2011 12:44

I have to say, I've no advice, but I love your dd! She is a creatve genius.

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 29/09/2011 12:43

oops bloomers even Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 29/09/2011 12:42

Ginormous loomers could be good - did you ever watch Allo Allo? "I too shall give my last pair of silk niqueuers for France!"

OP posts:
purplepidjinawoollytangle · 29/09/2011 12:39

I'll make it obviously small

Does anyone know where you get parachute silk from? Or would rigging something up out of a pair of granny pants off the market be more appropriate? I'm kind of drawn to the Heath-Robinson approach...

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 29/09/2011 12:33

That sounds so good I am sitting here picturing no5 child floating gently down from the garage roof with it... but will NOT be mentioning this vision to anyone ever as my no5 child is a thug and a daredevil and would be shouting To Infinity and Beyond before I could get to the D of Don't you DARE young man

OP posts:
purplepidjinawoollytangle · 29/09/2011 12:24

MrsSnaplegs - yes please

I have 36" of guitar strap. I will see if I can get a snap (like you get on rucksacks) that fits the width as the one I've got is too thin, otherwise I'll go see the nice chap in the Army and Navy shop about some webbing.

I'm thinking he either needs a strap around one of his segments with padded bits to go around his legs, or a simple adjustable strap around one of the joins between segments.

The pack itself will look like this but with only one popper. It will open out to a flat square which releases the parachute. I will put a cord on so that it can be ripped open mid air.

Inside will be a round-type parachute. Mr (Major? Sargeant? Sir might be safer...) Snaplegs will probably tell me this is inaccurate, if so I will attempt a rectangular type. I will then use wool to attach the edges to a split ring, which will be attached to the harness through the pack.

Does any of that make sense? I really should put this much energy into job hunting

Pay day is tomorrow, so I'll get started then Grin

stealthsquiggle · 29/09/2011 12:19

Handlebar moustache, definitely.

Pidj, I empathise. Perhaps if PomBear just never ever lets Miguel mention to DD that his parachute theoretically works, it might not get tested?

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 29/09/2011 12:14

LtEveDallas I love you Blush A large squashy Brown Paper Parcel just arrived with MY name on it, and not a bill, Yipeeeeee and it was the shirt and the rank thing and the little medal Grin Thank you so much - I'm not convinced we're not all slightly totally mad, but whether we are or not, Miguel Tuna will be home for Christmas in uniform, with a kit bag and photos will be posted Grin

OP posts:
MrsSnaplegs · 29/09/2011 11:57

Late to this thread but if purplepidj needs advice on parachute packing I can ask DH (ex para) Grin pm if you want

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 29/09/2011 11:57

Right - the measurements (of Mabel) and nobody tell her I am sharing her vital statistics with the world! Hell hath no fury than a Tuna upset and all that
At the seam where one segment joins the next the circumference is 12 inches.
Across the widest part of a segment, from side seam to side seam is 9 inches (the legs are attached into the side seams in the middle of the segments)
The legs are 3 inches wide - they're not stuffed all the way up the leg so where they attach into the side seam is flat and the seam is 3 inches long.
Each segment is 7 inches long end to end.
There is 3.5 inches between the tailend of one leg seam/end of leg stitching and the beginning/front end of the next.
(Mabel's first segment behind her head is slightly bigger but not a massive amount, and that could be a stuffing issue Blush )

Is that everything?

OP posts:
GeekLove · 29/09/2011 11:49

I have been lurking and have had to nominate this thread for Classics!
Magic keys and embroidered tattoos are the way to go.

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 29/09/2011 11:48

I am torn with the tache - I can get felt and do a lovely handlebar one, or I welcomed any excuse to go in there happened to be passing one of those accessory shops the other day and they had some brightly coloured "hair extensions" on hair grips in electric blue and orange and other flourescent shade. I thought about getting one and using the grip to "stitch" it through his face under anaesthetic of course cut the grip off, and let it dangle like a Fu Manchu. That's not really Hero of the Resistance though... the handlebar one is much more The Thing really...

OP posts:
purplepidjinawoollytangle · 29/09/2011 11:47

Approximate is fine - I have some scrap guitar strap from another mad project so can make it adjustable...

Original poster
PomBearAtTheGatesOfDawn · 29/09/2011 11:44

Oh DOH doh, thrice DOH Blush Why didn't I think to just measure Mabel? That said, if Mabel is at the back of DDs bed I can't reach her either short arse and cannot climb but no2 son should get in from college soon so I can get him to get her for me and measure her. They aren't exactly identical but we held one of each up in the shop and they're the same length and the segments are pretty much the exact same size. It's only that Miguel is fluffier has manly body hair that makes them different.
And Shock at rushofblood I do hope not! DD can be his counsellor as she helps Mabel and Sydney nurse him back to health and all will be well!

OP posts:
MilkNoSugarPlease · 29/09/2011 11:37

He needs aviator sunglasses to!!

purplepidjinawoollytangle · 29/09/2011 11:29

Oh yes, he's well used to the major minor nuttiness of the Pidj way of life Wink The thing is, he's into drag racing - he'd probably have a fair idea of the ratio's needed to stop a top fueller at the end of the 1/4 mile Grin

I really really really want to make a working one Sad

iscream · 29/09/2011 11:27

Late to this thread but surely Mr. Tuna would have a battered photo of Mrs Tuna and little Sydney that he's been carrying loving around for years??
Ooh yes, he must have those!