If my 3yo had access to AIBU...

My mummy has no dog she has a cat

She won't let em ride on cat, she says cat is too old but cat only 2 years older than biggest brother and every time he tries anything she tells him he is a child not an adult.

So cat is right age to give ridey on kitty to me no?

And dady amde me wear clothes to nursery, I tried to take off my sweater as we were leaving (trousers after) but they said no too cole. It was a CARS sweater, just becuase I went to see cars why would I want a sweater? I want to wear stripey sweater that is wet in wash. With no coat but nursery lady says I must have coat to go outside, and I want to go outside and find baby snail I stepped on yesterday, or stepp on another one.
Snaily liked it: it oozed, that means snailey like it.

AND mummy ripped cakey wrapper at lunch. She is elarning though; she gets up earlier to open my brekky bar and juice now so she can replace it if I screech, she is almost well trained. It only took 4 bars to get me to eat breakfast yesterday, I was being nice no?

so funny

My mummy is bad then. because my mummy put a stair gate on the kitchen door, so dog can't come in any more when i get my dinner and so i can't feed him...cruel woman! And i hear you all about broken bananas, i don't eat BROKEN BANANAS, i want a new one!!!!!

Plus she don't let me draw on toast or walls, she said you draw on paper or in colouring books, where is the fun in that?! Honestly you should see her taste in wallpaper, my drawings look soooooooo much better!!!!

The2.8yroldwhoeatsdrytoast2

If I see one more
"stay away from AIBU " I will direct the poster to this thread.

I have been in a shit mood all day and this has cheered me up no end.

dadda say 'no more shaun the sheep' . I want shaun sheep. dadda give banana and break banana in two. Who eat broken banana ?!?!! Banana broke, want nother one. Don't care there no other one, want one. an unbroken one . Don't care shop closed. Want new unbroken banana !! dadda tries to put banana back together. banana falls apart. so bang table and make boo-hoo. Want Shaun sheep.! Want new unbroken banana.!

Want Shaun sheep.!

Want pee-pee but not tell daddy.

daddy let me watch shaun sheep. but want one with the funny man not the one with the kite, daddy find one with funny man and put on ..... don't want one with funny man, want one with kite. daddy ask do I want pee-pee. Yes I want pee-pee but watching shaun sheep. say not want pee-pee.

daddy say am i sure i not want pee-pee. ignore daddy. daddy tries to feed me broken banana. NOT WANT BROKEN BANANA !!!!!!!

daddy look at me funny way. daddy say ' i think you need a pee-pee.

i tell daddy i NOT WANT PEE-PEE !

ooh look half a banana. result. eat banana.

do pee pee on chair.

Oh, I have a lot to learn from you all! Today, my Mummy was most unreasonable. I was just having an adventure and squishing my hands into some sloppy squidgy stuff, when my Mummy shouted at me saying something like that's your sister's Homework - she worked so hard to build that WW1 trench out of mud (what IS a trench anyway? It felt nice and squidgy!) and she picked me up and moved me away from the table.

I showed my displeasure by throwing myself backwards and hitting my head of the floor, going a strange shade of puce, kicking my legs a lot and screaming VERY loudly in my Mummy's ear. I'm sure my sister wouldn't mind me playing with the squidgy stuff, even if it was homework.

I have a LOT to learn I see. I am taking notes, and will try harder next time my Mummy IBU.

Yours, LittleKitten4, 7.5mo.

Have you tried a Positive Toddlering course?

Oh SAF Please, remember that one day, you'll be free of her. Keep fighting for what you believe in - fart jokes, snot lined sleeves, Ben 10 on a continuous loop 24/7 denying the viewing of any intellectual TV, sugar on your Sugar Puffs, no fruit before chocolate!

Stand and be counted! You're not alone.

YABU if you failed to get any on the ceiling.

Oh this has really made my day! Thank you for the shuddering laughs!

P.S. CLEARLY your DM is BU.

See, this is the kind of thing you should all be sharing, you need to tell people out your mothers.

Free expression of art at this age is essential for expanding the imagination. Lisa. Have you thought about maybe drawing on your dry toast? Would this be possible, expand your horizons, walls and toast?

And SAF - sleeves are for that very purpose........ hankies are so unhygienic. YUK! Fart jokes are the building blocks for social acceptance at this age, what is your mother thinking of?

YANBU obviously the woman is mad!!

Mine doesn't understand my "art" i mean drawing all over the white boring walls in the hall is adding colour surely?"
Plus she's always doing that "please" thing, i mean really what is YOUR obsession with it!
She needs to understand that cutting does not mean cutting unless i mean it... got it? I did the same to my mother, she cut my ruddy fajita in half after i said yes to cutting it, i mean...grrr! So of course, i threw it over the kitchen and then poured the cranberry juice onto the floor (which wouldn't happen if she just bought the fruit shoots!)

The2.8yroldwhoeatsdrytoast2

Ace!

Although, I doubt my four year old would ever wonder whether she's being unreasonable. If there was a forum called "I HAVE GOT A HORRIBLE MUMMY AND I HATT HER" she would definitely post there, though.

There is help out there for you all. Such a sad thread to read. Maybe you could all get in touch with a local support group?

MiniBitter - your mother sounds utterly vile. Did you not explain to her that spoons are essential for hand/eye co-ordination?

SmallestPeach - maybe you could help others like yourself by sharing your expertise?

I feel for you. It's time more of you spoke up and we heard!

Poor You, OP.

Your life sounds like a bed of roses compared to mine, however. My Mother reduced me to tears the other day by refusing to let me eat my sandwich with a spoon.

I got her back this morning though, by opening a whole box of what I think were christmas decorations and hanging them up by their pretty blue strings.

MiniBitter 2.8

I understand you pain, OP. This morning my stupid mother did not realise that while I was LOUDLY requesting a nappy change because I had done a poo, expecting me to lie down or even stand still for said nappy change is right out of the question.
She is an adult for christ's sake. Surely changing a very full and sloppy nappy while at a flat run should be easy for her?!

YABU clearly- had you taken the pear, chewed it a little then hidden as far down the back of their newest sofa as possible you would have had a much bigger effect.

You are also BU for weeing your pants: don't you know that you should have done that three metres in front of her as she was on the toilet, just outside her reach and frustratingly close to the loo? You're such a beginner!.

Pears thrown at TVs as well- what is this, ineffective.advice.com? the best way to deal with a TV (especially one not tuned ito scooby doo) is to frisbee a plate at it. Glasses are useful underneath a table where they are not seen until someone treads on their shards.

There's something horrible about any squished fruit oir veg in a pilow case as well.

Don't worry, keep going and you will get there: I am only the preschooler I am today thanks to my 3 elder brothers.

HTH

SmallestPeach (3.5)