What's the most stupid way you've injured yourself?

I opened the car door and hit myself in the head with it, I'm still not sure how. At break time (teacher) the first aider had a look at me and decided I had better go off to A&E to be checked out for concussion. I had the rest of the day off. To be honest I am usually more trouble than the children.

Was sat on the toilet and fiddling with my rings. Ring fell to the floor so I lent forward to pickuit up. When I came back up, I hit my head so hard off the sink I knocked myself out.

Was on an A shaped ladder, pushed up the loft hatch cover. Ladder wobbled and as I lost my balance the loft hatch came down with my fingers between its edges and the hatch trapping one hand each side of it.

Lucky the ladder didn't go all the way over however I was stuck with my fingers trapped.

cut my eyeball when trimming my fringe....

The doctor used the word 'puncture'

Managed to sprain BOTH of my ankles at the same time playing rounders on Hampstead Heath when I was in my 20's.
All us youngsters (oh those were the days) had gone for a drunken picnic and the shoes I had on were the equivelent of the flat pumps the youngsters wear these days. They had very smooth soles and as I was running, somehow my feet just splayed out to the side, and I was done for.
Marvellously impressive bruising almost up to knee level. Had a tubigrip on one leg and some sort of sticky plaster over the tubigrip on the other leg.
DP (now DH) was a bit mortified by me I think!
Broke my little toe a few years ago one Friday night stubbing my toe on the iron thing that holds the living room door open after drinking several glasses of wine.

miniwedge That sounds hideous , very scary but beautifully explained .

I went to sodding legoland over two weeks ago and gave myself whiplash on a souped up teacup ride

I am not even getting any sympathy because everyone just laughs when I tell them . But it hurts !

MrsChemist I did that too, and had to wear a neck brace for two weeks!

A few months ago I was sitting on the sofa waiting for my dinner to cook, had just got over horrendous morning sickness so was constantly starving. When the buzzer went on the cooker i was so excited i leapt off the sofa, got one foot caught up my trouser leg and fell flat on my face on the floor! Had a really attractive bruise on my forehead

I walked into the end part of a stairgate and passed out with the pain, had an earth shattering bruise for weeks

I also injured my back and had to be stretchered out of my shared house years back. I was racing my BF at the time naked for the shower, slipped and fell in the smallest room in the house behind the door... It was a real challenge for the ambulance service to remove me from the room on a spinal board without flashing me to the whole world - it took them an excruciatingly embarrassing hour , thankfully most of it passed in a blur thanks to the pain relief . Weirdly my flatmate in the next room slept through the whole thing and was surprised to find out I was in hospital

I once slipped on a piece of cooked pasta that my mum had dropped and tore my cruciate ligaments - ruined my fencing season...

And not too long ago I was at evening surgery to get DD checked over (she'd had a perforated eardrum) and as the staff let me out through the office entrance, I failed to mind the step and badly sprained my ankle. Oh, and the sign was only there in HUUUUUUUGE letters... The looks on the receptionists' faces - terrified taht I'd sue, or something? I just couldn't stop apologising.

I broke my shoulder in a trolley / hill/ tree/ alcohol incident told my
Mum I'd injured it playing basketball (at night in a little black dress and heels )

sliced open my thumb whilst using a biro and a trainer to open a tin of beans

also cut the end off another finger while using a bread knife to cut an easter egg in half

Good grief mini!! :o
I have also done that pinchy thing but it was with the really nippy metal handles of my secateurs. I put them against my thigh to exert more pressure on a branch, CLACK they shut and pinched my thigh terribly. I still have a scar. Oh, i squealed :)

I broke my coxyxx,

I stood on the counter to get something from the top cupboard, I am v short.
I went to jump off lithely and sylph like.
I didn't know that my shoelace was caught round the drawer handle.
My foot stayed up in the air thus causing me go slip on the other foot and land right on my arse.

Not as bad as the garlic press nipple episode, but mine is pretty stupid anyway.

I was freewheeling on my bike down a hill, looking at the front wheel whizzing around and I stuck my foot in the spokes. On purpose.

I cartwheeled out of my seat and hurtled to the ground at speed, painfully twisting my foot and ankle in the process.

In my defence I was only 9 years old, but even so, just how stupid was I?

Re the garlic press it was a type where the end (not the garlic crushing end) closed together as you crushed like the handle of a pair of scissors. I was crushing a huge garlic clove and for some reason held it against my boob as I was crushing.
As I exerted pressure the clove gave way and my nipple was caught in hte end - for some reason I kept squeezing for a few seconds.
To make it worse I was in a friend's house with her stupid dangerous garlic crusher and she was weeping with laughter.

She bought me an identical garlic press for my birthday

on the table

Cut myself through the eyebrow. With my own thumbnail. I was doing an exercise video and my co-ordination is shit.

bibbitybobbittyhat I managed to break my ankle in 3 places too, and had the pins, plate etc too by slipping on a bastard doormat (while pregnant)

I also superglued my fingers together when using said glue to stick wall paper to the wall..