Overheard in a change room yesterday

my DDs fave is telling ppl her daddys in jail .. constantly.. which admittedly he is a lot.. he works there!! bloody wee ains [hblush] also my nephew thinks his mums pubes are poo and does the ''why do you have poo on your jina you need to wipe it mummy'' conversation with her a couple of times a month at least [hgrin]

Vezzie you explained that brilliantly

Today, a young couple in Boots spotted a sale sign -
"A third off... what's a third off three pounds?"

Yesterday at the V&A I was passed by two of the sort of sort of smartly bundled old dears who look as if they have very carefully made all of their clothes out of tea cosies from Liberty - all solid, sensible, respectable, cheerful bustling. One of them was saying to the other in a "you know how it is" tone of voice,

"And then in the car he lit the most enormous spliff -"

Feels like a year...

I once overheard what was becoming quite a vicious argument between three teenage girls. 2 of them insisting that a woman is pregnant for a year, the other one was trying to tell them it was 9 months. They were getting quite mean and ridiculing her. In the end I turned round to them and said "actually it's 9 months, she's right"

when dd was little one of the first times I recall her talking loudly in the changing rooms was all about boobies, she was about 18 months and kept going on about boobies and boobie milk yumyum and so on, I could hear the giggling outside

these days if we are ever in the same cubicle she asks is a loud 'whispering' voice and conspiratorial tones if I have THE BLOOD

I am well past embarrassment

went to a local chinese restaurant that the kids love and insisted going to, i like the nicer other one nearby and had been trying to persuade them to go there as the food is much better. Walk in only for ds to proclaim loudly to the nice owner, 'mum says your food isn't very good!'

I was shopping in tesco and my ds (5) was telling me all about the 'naked' american Indians who had done an assembly at his school. The woman on the till couldn't stop giggling

Oh yes i can sympathise with you re darling dc in toilet cubicles with you,

ds Mummy,why have you got a hairy bum?
me I haven't,dont open that door
ds You have Mummy,its really hairy,Why havent i got a hairy bum?
Cue much sniggering from outside
me shush & lets decide where to go next
ds I'm going to wash my hands & the little monkey opened the door with me with my jeans halfway up my thighs

I swore from that day on i will never go the toilet with him in the same cubicle in public ever again.

Another cubicle story was told to me by a friend,her & her dm were out shopping in debenhams,there were 4 toilets & they went in the ones at each end,they heard one girl saying 'I wished i'd have bought that dress now'
The other girl says 'Which one?' First girl says in a just half way through having a poo voice 'Arggh,the 'plop' yellow one'

Nice.

Overhead in a changing room a couple of years ago - one women telling her friend how fab her 'dicknee' jeans were. Now I'm not into my labels but I'm pretty sure its pronounced D K N Y
(this is where someone tells me that I'm actually the idiot)

Overheard a mum talking about her daughter being vegetarian.

"She's very creative with her food though - she eats fish." [hgrin]

My dad overheard this in the swimming pool changing rooms.

'Daddy what's that between your legs?'

'Daddy why is it getting bigger?'

BoojaBooja

In the swimming pool changing rooms: ' mummy, I can see your boobies. Why are they so long?' pause. 'mummy, why do you have hair poking out of you knickers?'

Years ago, in Chester Zoo, dad to young son: "That's the one that's extinct" - pointing at an eagle, flapping around the aviary. Knob.

I overheard two girls in town talking about someones funeral.
One asked the other if her dad was reading the "trilogy"

this was indeed big, bright and ugly but Bristolian not Majolica.

Majolica ware is ugly brightly-coloured ceramics.

I was in a big toilet cubicle (with baby change in) with both children. Went to go to toilet and told ds quite loudly firmly 'don't you dare touch that lock' (has a history of opening door when I am on the toilet ).

Voice comes from next cubicle 'what that woman said'

Made me giggle. At least I'm not the only one.

What's a majolica?

I dunno but if anybody overheard my sister coming out with this gem when we were in the pub 'soliciting must be a stressful job' (during a conversation about solicitors) i'm pretty sure they left a puddle on the floor next to mine

Overheard today in a people-type museum.

'Quent darling come and see the majolica'

I shit you not.

And it wasn't even majolica so stick that in your pretentious pipe and smoke it matey.

My DDs swimsuit has a razorback not racerback according to her.
Freddy Kreuger Speedos