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Original poster

Overheard in a change room yesterday

381 replies

Jacksmania · 08/07/2011 17:57

A mum telling her daughter that the style of dress she was trying on was called "UMPIRE waist".

I'm sorry, I know I'm a total caaaahhhh, but I was and and covering my mouth to keep from laughing.

What have you overheard (not necessarily in a change room) that made you :o?

OP posts:

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 10/07/2011 22:20

Cedise - that made me snort out loud and brought up memories of the . [hgrin]

TheFogsGettingThicker · 10/07/2011 21:51

Last week, my MIL came back from taking my DD (5) and her 3 year old cousin to the toilets, stifling laughter. She had overheard their girlish chatter in the cubicle-

Little cousin - "You have the same fou-fou as me!"
Dearest Daughter - "Yes, my mummy does too. But hers has got black hair on it..."

MIL told this story to me, then repeated it to SIL when she collected her dd...

Amapoleon · 10/07/2011 20:52

My ds announced to the whole bus that I was going to the hospital to get a new booby.

Also, when he was 3 and we were at the cinema, he shouted out boobies at a very poignant moment during the film Up. The audience went from sobbing to sniggering.

Can you see a theme developing here? Hahahaa

DoingTheBestICan · 10/07/2011 20:40

These are brilliant,i love this thread.

Lemonmousse you just made me laugh so much i nearly choked on my cuppa,the thing i want to know is did your dh poo his pants?

cat64 · 10/07/2011 20:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Cedise · 10/07/2011 20:10

Two elderly ladies walking into Wilkinsons. EL1: What you want in 'ere then? EL2: Foyerloiters (firelighters in a broad Norfolk accent). EL1: What you want them for then? EL2: Ter loit me foyer.

Mum, who didn't hear them, didn't understand why I was pissing myself laughing, I couldn't explain for a few minutes, as we were standing right behind the ladies in question!

EverythingsNotRosie · 10/07/2011 20:00

A large gentleman by the name of "Uncle Gary" from Yorkshire waddling around the Louvre. When he finally got to the Mona Lisa (moaning the whole way that his feet hurt) he said "It's a bit fuckin' small!" There are no words.

lazarusb · 10/07/2011 19:39

Climbing the stairs in one of the towers at Warwick Castle. An American lady said loudly to her husband "You'd think they'd put elevators in these nowadays".

nickschick · 10/07/2011 18:22

notquitegrownup ...the worst thing was she told me about this several times after (i worked in the school) it became a bit of a joke she thought ds3 was going to say something entirely different and had her answer ready unfortunately he shocked her so much that was the only reply she could think of.

setara · 10/07/2011 17:44

stood outside a jewellery shop in derbyshire (where i live) having a nosey.

Smartly dressed woman next to us says to her husband

"Oh how quaint, i didn't realise they would have jewellery shops round here"

excuse me while i get back to my whittling

LadyClariceCannockMonty · 10/07/2011 17:36

In gym changing room:

Woman 1: Those are some serious boots.

Woman 2: Yes, well I'm going to kick some serious arse.

Original poster

Jacksmania · 10/07/2011 17:28

Oh, and recently in a toilet cubicle:
DS: "Mummy, the flower on your bum is so pretty! Mummy, can I touch the flower on your bum? It's soooooo beauuuuutiful!"

I have a magnolia bloom tattooed on my hip. Heaven knows what anyone outside thought... another here who came out making no eye contact.

OP posts:

Original poster

Jacksmania · 10/07/2011 17:26

Overheard this at barbecue party yesterday: young bloke asking host, "hey x, where are the Hibachi balls?"

We were all until we figured out he wanted the bocce balls... :o

OP posts:

Cedise · 10/07/2011 15:26

When DD was about 5 she had no bum at all and any trousers/jeans just kept slipping down showing a couple of inches of bum-crack. I would point and say "Say no to crack!" and she'd giggle and pull them up. Of course one day we were in a car park, this huge builder-type guy got out of a car and his trousers were at half mast, and DD dutifully points and yells out "Say no to crack!"

chillistars · 10/07/2011 15:22

oh yes, put them in a changing room and they turn into little aliens. Is it just my three who can be little angels but then get them all in a family changing room and they turn into obnoxious brats who you want to disown?

Why do they do it?

StealthPolarBear · 10/07/2011 15:22

oh dear...
Did he also receive gold, a frankenstein mask and some brut aftershave?

bunkers · 10/07/2011 15:13

I was listening to a carol concert last Christmas. The leader of the ensemble was telling the story of the nativity and told the whole crowd (which was in a popular tourist spot and therefore very large) that Jesus was 'born in a manger - a type of barn'

Tas1 · 10/07/2011 14:53

I was bathing DD who was about 4 at the time. DH came rushing in to use the loo (he'd been holding on for ages but just couldn't hang on any longer). He tried to keep his back to her so she didn't see anything but alas it didn't work........."Mummy, whats Daddy doing to that slug?"

LineRunner · 10/07/2011 14:34

Stealth RE: the woman who announced 'I'm sorry I'm late for my interview, but I've had rather a lot to drink' - given that she was quite posh, all flowing hair and long skirts, and this was in Newcsatle, we all pissed ourselves.

The Receptionist kept a straight face though and simply said, 'Room 5, please.'

begonyabampot · 10/07/2011 14:21

DS in a busy shopping mall, 'mummy, what do you call those bomb things you fire out of ships and things... ah muslims! Me, 'no son, that would be missiles'.

shandyleer · 10/07/2011 13:48

Overheard in the fruit and veg aisle of the supermarket :

Lady number 1: "That's a strange place to put the tomatoes".

Lady number 2: "Yes it is, isn't it?"

Huh?

ThumbsNoseAtSnapewitch · 10/07/2011 13:35

FreePeace - I love your DS. [hgrin]

FreePeaceSweet · 10/07/2011 13:20

StealthPolarBear Yep. They went silent and avoided eye contact. This made ds worse as he just stood there going "Hellooooooooo? Any Bod-Dee hear me?" [hgrin]

SinicalSal · 10/07/2011 12:41

Oh jee had a genuine lol there at the round of applause for pooing mummy!

Notquitegrownup · 10/07/2011 12:26

Nickschick - great Headmisstress!

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