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Hmmmm? If there was an MNtrance exam, what would the questions be?

316 replies

ChaosTrulyReigns · 07/06/2011 13:33

  1. Are you able to understand irony?

a. Yes
b. No
c. Maybe
d. I never irony - just give it a good shake when it comes out the machine
e. All of the above
f. None of the above

Grin
OP posts:
MardyBra · 09/06/2011 16:51

Am I sad in I actually tried to do TalcandTurnips's wordsearch (but got frustrated because it didn't quite line up).

WorkingItOutAsIGo · 09/06/2011 16:41

Chaos : quote of the week as well as best typo ever. Have some Wine Wine Wine to celebrate!

YankNCock · 09/06/2011 14:45

Gusset Bleaching is due to:

a) Acid fanjo
b) Weeing yerself
c) You do what?!
d) I wouldn't know, my pelvic floor/vaginal pH is wonderful daaaahling

tb · 09/06/2011 13:35

Norks - could you add the option?

d) folded into a tasteful triangle (or other equally pointless shape)

PacificDogwood · 09/06/2011 13:20
Grin
TrillianWhoIsNotATwat · 09/06/2011 09:30

Which of these is the greater crime, and why?
a) American Tan tights
b) Crocs
c) Uggs
d) Fake Uggs
e) Fake Uggs with the sides trampled down

TanteRose · 09/06/2011 08:27

Mumsnet Driving Test:

Explain the correct motoring procedure for giving way on a narrow country lane, in less than 400 words. You MUST include the words zombie, wave and signboard.

CheerfulYank · 09/06/2011 08:11

Bonus points for times you have actually out loud referred to DS/DD/DH as such. Additional bonus points if you are not from the UK but spend so much time on Mumsnet you begin sprinkling British English phrases into your normal speech, prompting your friends to hold an intervention.

Also: My husband has just politely asked that I desist with the wild shrieks of mirth triggered by CRT's cunty typo. Do I a)put a ribbon in my hair and give him a blowjob or b) leave the bastard?

Tortoiseonthehalfshell · 09/06/2011 07:08

Oh, God, my pelvic floor is not cut out for Chaos' last typo.

Tee2072 · 09/06/2011 06:55

If it wasn't so, um, risqué Chaos, that would be quote of the week!

Maybe we should campaign for a typo of the week. Or maybe even a chaos typo of the week. Hmm...

petisa · 09/06/2011 00:11

Now I really have snorted tea all over the place at that typo Grin

FriggFRIGG · 08/06/2011 23:48

Actually, I think I'd like to take you up the front Cunty.

i think that might be the best typo you've ever made chaosy Grin

FriggFRIGG · 08/06/2011 23:46

did you know?? you've made it into classics !!

or am i being very slow? probably

ChaosTrulyReigns · 08/06/2011 23:32

move you up the front Cunty.

Blush
OP posts:
ChaosTrulyReigns · 08/06/2011 23:31

Actually, I think I'd like to take you up the front Cunty.

I've met types like you before.

Hmm

[schoolmarmy]

OP posts:
CuntyMacCaw · 08/06/2011 23:30

Ah, it hasn't worked, never mind.

CuntyMacCaw · 08/06/2011 23:28

Try this one...

ComeIntoTheGardenMaud · 08/06/2011 23:27

Question 1042

MN is a super-selective forum and this entrance exam seeks to identify those who can most benefit from the facilities which MN provides. It will be marked stringently.

Have you been tutored for this exam?

a) Yes, since the age of 12
b) No, but I have practised on some old papers
c) No, someone as clearly destined as I am for MN can be sure of acing the entrance exam
d) No, as anyone who has to be tutored to get through the MN entrance exam will struggle to keep up once they've been admitted

Marks will be deducted for plagiarism or blatant dishonesty

CuntyMacCaw · 08/06/2011 23:18

Ooh, I love that, Talc Smile

TalcAndTurnips · 08/06/2011 23:18

MN Wordsearch: Find as many MN words as possible:

B F V F F C N X G I N A N D T O N I C
A U P F B T K I F R P E R U N A D L O
T S M O L D I E S E J A Y D E N X M D
O D I S W U N K T I G P O M B E A R S
O J N A F Y M B W O G A N S C O C K
A M I L O X S T O O H S T I U R F B I

F T R I V E R S O F S W E E T C O R N

Words may appear in any direction.

NorksAreMessy · 08/06/2011 22:41

The flappy bit of the loo roll goes
A) down the front
b) down the back
C) you don't care as long as DH doesn't wipe his willy on the curtain

travailtotravel · 08/06/2011 22:33

The answer to all of these, is of course 42 Brew

TalcAndTurnips · 08/06/2011 21:55

(Actually - I think they're building new bits of University every bloody day - have you seen the Victoria Baths site recently?)

Question 19256: When faced with criticism of your dear old home town/city do you -

a) join in with general piss-taking, denying any connection with said town/city whilst weeping softly inside

b) take up arms and launch a broadside against anyone daring to state that the place of your abode is anything less than a modern-day Shangri-La

c) shrug with indifference. After all, the roads are a bit shite and the other day you saw a tramp turn his nose up at a shop doorway as it was a bit untidy and down-market for his liking.

youarekidding · 08/06/2011 21:51
Grin
MissMarjoribanks · 08/06/2011 21:45

I thought I had retained some semblance of a pelvic floor after giving birth. It appears I haven't after all. Thanks, MNers. Grin