Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mumsnet classics

Relive the funniest, most unforgettable threads. For a daily dose of Mumsnet’s best bits, sign up for Mumsnet's daily newsletter.

Original poster

to make a little sign for this woman?

862 replies

TandB · 15/04/2011 09:00

I have ranted on a previous occasion about the morning rat-run through our village so very quick summary:

Single track roads - short-cut to city - I am apparently only person who needs to go opposite direction during rush-hour - majority of people coming the other way clearly think I am unreasonable for driving through my own village and glare and head-shake at me - I am cross.

Obviously it is the holidays now, so the school run traffic is missing which makes life much easier. However, there is one woman who I see every single time. She drives very fast on a narrow, twisty road with several blind bends so I finish up crawling around corners in case she comes hurtling the other way. She flatly refuses to back up even a couple of feet to the nearest passing space, and she makes no attempt to move over so that both cars can pass without scraping through the hedge. So I finish up reversing to the next passing space with her driving about 6 inches off my front bumper with a face like thunder, and then as soon as the road widens at all, she squeezes past, glaring at me all the time and shaking her head.

Bearing in mind the following:

  1. I live here and have as much right to leave the village as she does to cut through it.

  2. I drive a very small car which causes minimal obstruction.

  3. I don't drive dangerously fast.

  4. I am the one reversing and getting off the road.

would I be unreasonable to make a little sign saying "The next time you shake your head at me will be the last time I reverse for you. I can sit here all day - how about you?"

Would probably be unreasonable to add "cowbag" at the end, I suppose.

OP posts:
nickelbaalamb · 19/04/2011 11:25

blimey Pixel Shock

It pisses me right off when people aren't aptient.
I remember once, having to pull onto a grass verge for an ambulance, and after the ambulance had past, all the cars behind me just pulled off around me instead of waiting their turn. Hmm

Pixel · 18/04/2011 22:14

Bit too far for me but with this amount of deranged zombies mumsnetters you will surely be able to pick her car up and move it back up the road, then she won't have a choice. Can you imagine her surprise?Grin

I remember driving through a tiny village on holiday once. I could see a tractor with a big trailer coming so I pulled into a gap at the side and waited patiently. Of course there were people behind me who couldn't be bothered and went past me and tried to squeeze past the tractor but there really wasn't room and the road got all jammed up. I had a lovely view of the drama unfolding in front of me which ended with the tractor ripping half the roof off a lovely cottage. Shock I felt really sorry for the tractor driver, he was only a young lad and hadn't done anything wrong.

thederkinsdame · 18/04/2011 21:16

I am very amused at the thought of the woman who will unknowingly come out of her driveway on Thursday morning, happily oblivious to the fact that thousands of people are a) aware that she drives like a twat b) currently plotting on ways to sort her out.

TastesLikePanda · 18/04/2011 20:48

not marking place

I can offer up my FIL who drives a cement mixer and can reverse like a demon due to having to reverse it up to deliver the cement to whatever random address in Devon!

SauvignonBlanche · 18/04/2011 20:46

I love the sign but did anyone else scroll down and see the glow-in-the-dark Loo roll? Hmm

TheMonster · 18/04/2011 20:44

SEA - I want one! Can you make it swear?

EgguStudent · 18/04/2011 20:30
Collision · 18/04/2011 19:17

bumping.......

southeastastra · 18/04/2011 19:17

you can use one of \link{http://www.iwantoneofthose.com/led-car-sign/index.html\these} to get your point across op Grin

Strumpypumpy · 18/04/2011 19:14

Just to mark my place which we wait...

I have got out of my car before and reverse parked a random womans car for her. She was blocking the whole high street and starting to get into a heated flap. The only way was to do it for her. She was mortified but relieved. The driver behind me slow clapped when I got back in my car. I gave him the Vs. Not mature in anyway, but a fairly international gesture. Twit.

SillyDolly · 18/04/2011 19:12

Ooo, gutted have to wait until Friday! Place marking :)

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 18/04/2011 19:05

Definitely yell 'hyena!!' - that will freak out the opposition!

Original poster
TandB · 18/04/2011 18:54

I probably should flag up that I am not usually a push-over - quite the opposite! I am generally more than happy to stick up for myself and have been known to shout at people who don't move down train carriages or who queue jump.

But for some reason this woman has managed to walk all over me - I think it might be her apparent absolute confidence that I am entirely in the wrong at all times - there is something mesmerising about it!

OP posts:
HecateQueenOfTheNight · 18/04/2011 18:53

Just marking my place.

Don't let us down now Grin

gallicgirl · 18/04/2011 18:50

ooo Thursday! I thought I might have missed the shenanigans.

I have to admit I was a bit bad atrocious at reversing until I lived in Devon for a short period. There's nothing like frequent reversing down country lanes to hone your skills. I do remember going the wrong way once and ended up in a very narrow dead-end street. A lovely man offered to reverse my car for me and I'm not ashamed to admit I jumped at his offer. He wasn't at all judgey either.

Good luck for Thursday. Perhaps the OP can practice being stern in the mirror?

Original poster
TandB · 18/04/2011 18:46

BodyOfEeyore Mon 18-Apr-11 17:13:27
kungfu, what did the moped rider say back?

He actually looked a little startled, as far as I could tell from the part of his face I could see, and drove off at speed while I yelled "stupid!" one more time for good measure.

Next time I shall yell "hyena!"

OP posts:
ChaoticAngelofchocolateeggs · 18/04/2011 18:36

Grin @ springbokdoc

springbokdoc · 18/04/2011 17:57

Kungfu last year in the game reserve a woman pulled up alongside us and about two other vehicles, thinking probably that it was best to get something out of the boot of her car with other vehicles around. Except we were watching two hyenas by the side of the road. As soon as her door opened me and my mom screamed in the most highpitched panic stricken voices 'Hyena! Hyena!'.

We like to think that we saved her life. Both my dad and dp love to point out that the hyenas started running in the opposite direction of the banshees and the woman banged her head leaping into her cae. So your 'stupid, stupid' tirade was actually shakespeare compared to us.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 18/04/2011 17:43

Thank you nickelbaalamb - I will be less of a numpty next time (I hope). Smile

Insomnia11 · 18/04/2011 17:30

Though I would just add everyone where I live has scratches on the sides of the car from getting too friendly with a hedge at some point.

Insomnia11 · 18/04/2011 17:29

On the route (country lanes) I drive (and now a couple of times a week cycle!) to work it's normally ok and a nice drive/cycle barring the occasional aggressive idiot...or lost HGV. Last year I was about third in a line of cars (several soon behind me) stuck on a narrow lane because of an HGV coming the other way...it was really stupid and annoying but then there isn't much point getting annoyed as there is little you can do in a situation like that. So I just sat there thinking "Tum te tum, so how are we going to sort this one out then?"

After a few minutes everyone started reversing which gradually filtered down to me and then the cars in front, and the HGV started moving forwards- eventually getting to a wide corner where the cars could squeeze past.... It actually made me feel quite positive in the end and I wanted to give all the car drivers a pat on the back for working together without anyone (visibly) losing their rag, and the lorry drive a kick up the backside!

One upside of driving on country lanes is I am now pretty confident with all manoeuvring and know the width and length of my car to the centimeter...

nickelbaalamb · 18/04/2011 17:23

actually, I had a boss once who could not reverse.
she hated it. It filled her with dread.
She used to get someone to park for her in the car park so she could drive out forwards at the end.

But she knew she had a problem, so if it had been her, she would have come over to you and asked you to reverse for her!

nickelbaalamb · 18/04/2011 17:22

it was too close to the speech mark.
yo uhave to leave a gap.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 18/04/2011 17:21

Why didn't those italics work? Confused

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 18/04/2011 17:20

Perhaps, in addition to the sign, you need a crib sheet of suitable bon mots to deploy on Thursday. I think that those of us like boobelina and I who live too far away to join the convoy should helpfully think up things you might need to say to her, things she might say, and the things you would then have to say in reply.

"Your car does have reverse gear too, you know!!"

"I can sit here all day, waiting for you to learn how to reverse your car."