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Horrible horrible present mix up involving sex toys. I have to go back in an hour.

186 replies

bambiandthumper · 04/01/2011 14:44

Blush Blush Blush Blush Blush Blush Blush Blush Blush Blush Blush Blush Blush Blush

I just met my best friend for a coffee, to give her her 30th Birthday present before she goes off for a childfree sexfest week in Mauritius with her DH as a 30th Birthday present Envy. I got her a pair of very naughty Agent Provocateur, knickers, karma sutra guide, hand cuffs, a feather boa, and this chocolatey lube stuff .I hasten to add this was intended as a joke, I actually got her a day at a spa. She unwrapped a boys top from Zara Kids, a small puzzle and a power ranger action doll thingy.

This means the 4 year old boy whose party my DT'S are at has unwrapped her present. Shock Shock Shock Shock Shock. I know for a fact it has been opened as there had been a small mix up with times, and they had to wait 10 minutes to be allowed into the soft play, and so when I was leaving the birthday boy's mum was calling them over to open presents to pass the time.

WHY did I use identical wrapping paper? But more importantly what do I do when I go to fetch them in an hour? Even worse, the whole of their nursery room was invited, plus a few other friends, the majority of which are there. Doubly doubly worse, I was the only mum/nanny to leave, so they will all know.

HELP

OP posts:
bambiandthumper · 04/01/2011 15:02

I was in such a rush that I didn't label either of them, and there was no card attached as our nanny helped DTD make one for him, and it was too big to get the envelope.

I just tried the soft play but its engaged. Fuckwank.

Friends just suggested blaming it on the DT's for picking up the wrong present. Now that could work.

We are still in the cafe and getting very strange looks. Friend keeps bursting into hysterical laughter and running to the loo. I am bashing away on her iphone (have no idea how to use it) Blush Blush Blush Blush

OP posts:
exexpat · 04/01/2011 15:02

Grin nice one. Bit too obvious starting the other thread at the same time though.

Malificence · 04/01/2011 15:01

It could have been much, much worse. Grin

shufflebum · 04/01/2011 15:01

sorry nothing constructive to add, just marking my place for the fallout report later Grin

MackerelOfFact · 04/01/2011 15:01

Oh God you poor thing! Assuming the mum wrestled the book off him in time, the rest is pretty innocuous to the uninitiated, ie. 4yo boys. He might quite like the feather boa and hand cuffs, and he'd probably think the lube was sweets.

The assembled mums, however... Blush

whizzipop89 · 04/01/2011 15:01

put it this way Bambi - at least you can gauge the mood before you turn up!

HarkTheTragicalyHipHeraldAngel · 04/01/2011 15:01

could this be you op?
Grin

whizzipop89 · 04/01/2011 15:01

and we can find out in realtime what happened - see the other thread in Chat - 'my child just opened a sex toys present'!!!

AllOverIt · 04/01/2011 15:00

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

coastgirl · 04/01/2011 15:00

At least it'll make a good idea for a sitcom in case you ever want to branch out Grin

allnightlong · 04/01/2011 15:00

Shock Your going to be the talk of the playground for a VERY long time. Grin

KalokiMallow · 04/01/2011 15:00

I so want to be sympathetic, but I'm actually laughing so much I'm crying! Grin

Snacka · 04/01/2011 14:59

ohhhh!!!! rofl !!

Curiousmama · 04/01/2011 14:59

oops Grin

sofaaddict · 04/01/2011 14:58

First Mumsnet thread to make me guffaw I'd call the soft play centre too and ask to speak to the mum - much easier broaching it over the phone first than seeing her face to face. Good luck!! Grin

LoveInAColdClimate · 04/01/2011 14:58

Glad the flowers suggestion assists.

Have you checked the label of your friend's present? If you have actually given them each the wrong present (rather than just mixing up the labels), there is a chance she will have seen that the present isn't meant for him (when checking to see who it's from) and not let him unwrap it? Clutching at straws but you never know...

HarkTheTragicalyHipHeraldAngel · 04/01/2011 14:57

Shock Grin

Sorry but that is hilarious! I do feel for you tho, I would be mortified!

Good luck and please let us know what happens when you pick them up Grin

MilkNoSugarPlease · 04/01/2011 14:57

Oh god I'm sorry but I just weed a little :o

COCKadoodledooo · 04/01/2011 14:57

Rofpmsl!

PrettyCandlesAndTinselToo · 04/01/2011 14:57

This reminds me of a thread a few years ago when a very religious, modest, MNer managed to send her ds to school with a pair of her knickers in his lunchbox.

Sorry, no help at all!

Brazen it out. Walk in confidently, hand over the proper present with a relaxed laughing apology for the mixup, and hope to goodness they've kept the other present together to give back to you.

Head high, girl!

Tikkabillajive · 04/01/2011 14:57

Oh god, this is the funniest thing I have read in 2011, thank you for cheering me up - PLEASE tell us what happens!

MissBeehivingUnderTheMistletoe · 04/01/2011 14:57

Oh no! You gave a four year old chocolate lube! Shock Just imagine how much fun they'll have with that on the slides!

Please post an update!

bringmesomeFIGGYpudding · 04/01/2011 14:57

I think I may just have wet myself a tiny bit, bloody pelvic floor!
Hahahahahaha
good luck!

If it makes any difference I would laugh if it was me!(getting the present!)

Debs75 · 04/01/2011 14:56

Ring the centre now and try and smooth it over.

Oh and thanks for making me laugh