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I'm quite sure I've just done something mad...

304 replies

lostinwails · 04/11/2010 11:23

TMI alert! Have had a very bad tummy bug and am left in a position where venturing more that 30 seconds from the loo would be a foolish risk. I've decided that the water I'm drinking is passing through my body at great speed so in a rash moment I've swallowed a round piece of floaty plastic to time how long it takes to come out. I'm mad aren't I, too long on the sofa with only flat lemonade and salty crisps for company I think.

OP posts:
juneybean · 04/11/2010 12:59

absolutely pissing myself at PlentyOfPockets

BusyMissIzzy · 04/11/2010 12:59

I don't think anything solid would pass through at the same rate as water. It's not like a tidal wave through a sewer in there, the intestines are quite narrow and solids have to be squeezed through by the muscles.

oldraver · 04/11/2010 12:58

DS ate a piece of Lego brick candy at a theme park. It was a light moss green colour so I assumed as it wasnt the usual lurid colours of some US sweets it was a natural colour like his fake Smarties

Oh no, it turned his poo Moss green and gave me a fright. I just looked in the bowl and thought 'what is wrong with that shit', then realsied it was the sweet

TeaRocks · 04/11/2010 12:56

I've read through the comments since I last posted and have concluded that the OP needs to eat some sweetcorn and gold leaf, in order to satisfy science and creativity.

JFly · 04/11/2010 12:56

The other night a chap on the One Show swallowed a little "pod" to measure his core body temperature. He said it would take two hours to reach his intestines, so I reckon your lego will be nearly there by now. Shock

But, if you're not eating much solid food after swallowing it, then maybe the transit through intestines, etc. will take a while as nothing there to (ahem) move the lego along.

I vote for 19:00 this evening.

MN Classics, anyone??

lostinwails · 04/11/2010 12:55

MaMoTTaT - yes that's me! Think I may need a name change in the near future though!

Toddlerama yes four times to be exact, I am starting to doubt the red lego's abilities to keep up with my water. I should have perhaps tried a small ball or perhaps a flake of silver foil, no sweetcorn in the house unfortunately and a trip to the shops is, sadly, inadvisable at the current time.

OP posts:
Tabliope · 04/11/2010 12:53

There was a reality tv show on a couple of years ago where everyone was having colonic irrigation. Can't remember who but during the process one of the celebs heard a loud rattle in the toilet and a marble came out. His mum told him later he'd swallowed it when he was 4... so you might have a long wait.

PlentyOfPockets · 04/11/2010 12:52

You probably chew your food properly. I tend to bolt mine and get all sorts turning up - sweetcorn, peas, peppers, even mushrooms. The worst was when I tried some sprouted chick-peas. I woke in the night feeling like I needed an enormous shit, sat and strained for a while and then ... BANG! There was this single floaty chick-pea in the pan, shot out by a giant fart. It woke the whole family Blush

thumbwheel · 04/11/2010 12:52

Dumbledoresgirl

DDG - sweetcorn nibs are notoriously indigestible unless you bite them. If you swallow them whole, it's very difficult for the digestive process to get through that outer casing, so they pass through virtually untouched.

pumperspumpkin · 04/11/2010 12:51

Absolute genius. I am on the edge of my seat. Update please OP!

AddictedIsAMummy · 04/11/2010 12:51

my dh is very worried that you are in fact dehydrated and doing silly things, he says please drink more and eat more salt.

But i just have to say please can people stop being so funny on this thread!! I gave birth 6 days ago and laughing hurts and laughing leads to coughing which hurts more!

Op you are a loon!

TheProvincialLady · 04/11/2010 12:50

If you get really bored you could always eat more pieces and see if you crap the completed figure.

cherrybea · 04/11/2010 12:49

You don't get anything this interesting on Loose Women!

Dumbledoresgirl · 04/11/2010 12:47

Sorry for all the questions. I am just passing time until Lostinwails makes her announcement. Grin

scrappydappydoo · 04/11/2010 12:46

LOL now I know I have read everything on mn!

I'm currently potty training dd2 and think that glittery pink poo might make a good incentive.... goes off to buy beetroot and glitter.

Dumbledoresgirl · 04/11/2010 12:45

Thanks juneybean. next question then: how is it I eat sweetcorn and don't see bits of it in my poo?

Actually, I have to say, I don't really examine bodily excretions, but I guess I would have seen something at some point by now as I do eat sweetcorn regularly.

Oh oh and another thing: is it the same for peas?

kreecherlivesupstairs · 04/11/2010 12:44

DD took great delight in eating tinsel. Her nappies were a sparkly affair. DH nearly shit himself the first time he saw blue sparkles in her poo.

thumbwheel · 04/11/2010 12:43

DDG - sweetcorn nibs are notoriously indigestible unless you bite them. If you swallow them whole, it's very difficult for the digestive process to get through that outer casing, so they pass through virtually untouched. :)

PlentyOfPockets · 04/11/2010 12:42

Ah OK, I take it back - you have far more spare time than I do.

BTW, is that brown edible glitter "before" or "after"?

Thanks for this thread, I have tears rolling down my face Grin

Dumbledoresgirl · 04/11/2010 12:40

You'll be fine. A year ago, my ds1 (then aged 13) swallowed a magnetix ball. I am not sure how long it took to come out as he did not tell us he had swallowed it in the first place, but I know it took about 3 days of sitting in the bottom of the loo (disguised in a poo) before I twigged why this particular piece of excrement was not flushing away.

But the point is: magnetix balls are much bigger than small bits of lego.

OTOH, there is the floaty element to it. I would worry about that personally.

PS how many grown people actually poo undigested sweetcorn? Don't your bodies know how to break it down? Shock

toddlerama · 04/11/2010 12:37

Have you been to the loo at all since you ate it?

MaMoTTaT · 04/11/2010 12:36

Grin - this thread is fab

Can I just OP - are you the same lostinwails I have on my FB Grin

I like the edible glitter idea too.........DS3 is still using the potty and always has a good peer in once he's done - he would be thrilled with sparkly poo Grin

lostinwails · 04/11/2010 12:35

prize

It's a round piece of lego, I did rigorously test it in the sink before I swallowed it, honestly I'm not THAT stupid

OP posts:
Maisiethemorningsidecat · 04/11/2010 12:34

This was so not what I expected to read! Grin

I'm joining the others who are eagerly awaiting the passing of the plastic.

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