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Further education

You'll find discussions about A Levels and universities on our Further Education forum.

DS thinks he picked all wrong A levels !!! existential problems

28 replies

microbius · 01/11/2021 22:39

A bit of history and context. DS is in private secondary, on a bursary. He finished GCSEs with a good range of 9-8 and a couple of 7. We all thought he would be doing some kind of engineering - he was always obsessed with that kind of thing as a kid. He picked Maths, Physics, Art. He was very keen on having Art there. School insisted he had a 4th one, so he picked Economics.

DS broke down today crying that he doesn't know what he is interested in and what he wants to study. He says he hates the choices he made and if he would be choosing today he would choose English, RS, Psychology (and keep Art that he likes). He wants to go into therapy. He doesn't want to discuss his MH with me, but he seems to be having some existential problems. He says his MH is only partially related to A-levels

In practical educational terms, if he really decides he doesn't want to continue these subjects, what are the options? Can he leave and restart in state 6th form with a different set of subjects next year? Should he slog on? - it seems a long way - 2 years - to be doing what you hate. He says he doesn't feel strongly about any subject (depression?)

I mean, he told me in very strong terms when we were choosing A levels that he was not doing any essay-based subject! He is not sure he REALLY wants to do English or RS anyway....

He has very good friends, he is not bullied, the school is good although perhaps there is a bit of pressure. He was always considered bright, an interesting person.

What are our options? I understand it is too late to change now, and especially if you're not sure. Should I send him next year somewhere with a Ebacc? (assuming he can get in). Would a good 6th from even take him after quitting A levels midway? Can he repeat a year in the same school (I will probably need to borrow money to pay full fees then and it might not be doable or outright crazy)...

Thank you to everyone whose children went through similar experiences for your advice, whether on the forum or pm

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microbius · 01/11/2021 22:48

I probably also need to add that we are not originally from the UK and I raised him a sole parent. Somehow I feel this whole situation can be my fault? Although I don't think I pushed him too much; he was never showing as a humanities type person, was always into his lego/cars/drones/cars etc

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AlexaShutUp · 01/11/2021 22:46

No comparable experience, but I'm sure he would be able to start again next year in a state sixth form college. My friend's dd repeated year 12 due to mental health problems and it turned out to be the best thing for her.

I'd be cautious though about him packing it in immediately. Can you get him some counselling first while he carries on for a bit longer so that he can delay the decision? Or is he desperate to quit right now? How is he doing with his current subjects? Has he said why he hates his subjects now? It's quite a jump from gcse to a-level, I wonder if he has maybe lost confidence a bit?

Tbh it sounds like there are other bigger issues going on for him, and his wellbeing is really the most important thing. If you can try to get appropriate support for him, maybe the other stuff will fall into place? Does the school have a counsellor that he could talk to?

microbius · 01/11/2021 22:46

Can he drop to two A levels and do another one after 18? I know I should be talking to school but I don't want to jump the gun

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