Class of 18. No need for new school shoes

marmite
I successfully auditioned for the chapel choir at university and had the most amazing time singing with them. I'm still in touch with those friends now.

Thanks to those who have asked how things are.
I went up to see dd this week. She seems a bit better now that she is getting into lectures and enjoying them. She is still having difficulties though which I think are at least partly tiredness related as them seem to get worse at the end of the week.

We now have a confirmed offer on Mum's flat with a completion date at the end of October. I finished clearing apart from a few bits which my brother will do tomorrow. It was a wrench to leave as it makes things seem more final. It also means I will no longer have a base in Dd's university city.

Ds' s university have now agreed to his repeating the year in the way his department advised. We still don't know about funding and lectures start tomorrow. He is going to go but the uncertainty means he has a less than ideal start which was part of the problem previously.

Good to hear of others enjoying their second year.

NoHaudin I hope that things are better for you today, you have so much on your plate at the moment.

That is handy @raspberryrippleicecream , nice for them to have some time together too.
When dd2 went to stay with her sister last term I was full of warnings about leading her astray and not taking her to any parties but I needn't have worried - they just went to museums and played crazy golf!

Thinking of you NoHaudin

Dd's first week of lectures has gone well I think. DS2 has gone up to stay with her tonight - he is going to her uni city every Saturday for some particular training and this weekend has an extra course tomorrow. DD is handily situated a short bus ride away (and it runs doorstep to doorstep). The city is an hour and half train ride from us, so its very handy!

DD 1 is very happy back at uni. She had thrown herself back into helping freshers with the music society and is auditioning today for choirs. She has also taught her first singing lesson to a child which should bring in some pennies. She is back for 24 hrs this weekend because we are scattering my dad's ashes on Sunday morning.

Miss her but love that she is so busy and happy.

Thinking of you @NoHaudinMaWheest, hope you're finding time to look after yourself a bit too.

@ShanghaiDiva have a wonderful trip very definitely envy!

We've been out for a "last supper" tonight with grandparents etc. DD is finally going back for good tomorrow after a couple of months to-ing and fro-ing.
She doesn't plan to come back again until mid December, she's got a very full on timetable this term. I've told her tonight I can't promise not to visit! Even if just for the odd afternoon.

Having been there for three days, DS has got himself a part-time job working at an events venue. It sounds interesting, and might be an opportunity to meet people.

He would hate Bhutan - falls into the category of one of Mum's weird holidays to places with dubious infrastructure and poor quality wifi!
He does like the UK although not keen on the wet and windy weather. He is also very fond of UK supermarkets and complains about the lack of choice and slightly dubious hygiene practices here in China.

Does he enjoy life in England? It must seem dull and grey compared with the prospect of Bangkok and Bhutan.

@NoHaudinMaWheest - hope you have a positive visit with your dd on Wednesday and that your ds's funding issue is sorted quickly.
Dropped Ds at the airport today with 40 kilos of 'essentials'.
Will miss him, but we are going on holiday on Friday to Bangkok and then on to Bhutan so have something else to focus on and after the first couple of weeks away, the time seems to whizz by and he will be back with Xmas pudding and cake!

Thanks for the good wishes.

Oh my Nohaudin what a lot to have on your plate. Best wishes.

Oh no. You do have a lot on your plate NoHaudin

She is very much in touch with disability services and has a weekly mentoring session.
Her GP is waiting for the letter from MH services and will then consider with her whether antidepressants are the right way to go, at least in the meantime.
I am going up on Wednesday, mainly to supervise the final clearance of my mum's house as it will be sold shortly. However it gives me a chance to see how dd is.
We have put in some help from a care agency to deal with some of the practical things she was finding difficult.
I will go up regularly but still have to be based here as ds has major problems too. His plan was to try 2nd year yet again with some adjustments. His department is fine about it, but the university authorities are now being difficult and we are still waiting to hear from SFE about funding.

Speaking of GP appointments - it seems to be a bit of three ringed circus getting one in her University town, but she jumped through lots of hoops and finally managed to get an appointment with a proper doctor. She was due to go down to London for a gig so booked a train for after her afternoon appointment. She then got a text that morning cancelling the appointment. No rhyme or reason and no way to rebook.

Sorry to hear about MH problems. One of DDs housemates who struggled a lot last year is still struggling. She thinks the house is haunted, doesn't like being there alone but also is not a party animal so doesn't like going out with the others. I think she is wishing she had stayed in halls and DD is hoping she doesn't bale out as the rest of them will be responsible for her rent. At least she seems to have told her mum that she is scared of the house so her mum is visiting regularly to take her out to lunch.

They are such a worry.

DD has announced that she is only going to go clubbing once a week as it is too far (15 minutes on the bus) and she can't be bothered. They have decided to socialise in pubs in the area and get earlier nights and get lots of work done. Praise the Lord.

Alfie continues to be hard to love. I feel awful as he is a sweetheart just not very spanielly. Took him along the canal this morning and he didn't even notice the ducks...

Sorry to hear about your DD NoHaudinMaWheest
It is so hard when your DC is ill and you can't be there to hold their hand.

DD's health issue is not resolving itself, and she stayed in last night. She is trying to get a GP appointment. She isn't keeping in touch very much because I think she doesn't want to worry me.

Nohaudin do you have DDs permission to speak to the uni disability services on her behalf? They were lovely when we urgently needed some support for DD last year. There was none of the pfaffing about waiting for external MH services, they put weekly support sessions into her timetable straight away. The sessions were in the central library too I think, so should be physically accessible to your DD.

I am looking after two dogs for the week. One is mine, the other is a friend's. So far, my dog has thrown up 4 times, (I think it is an abreaction to Metacalm so I'm discontinuing) and the other dog (Large breed) has cut his paw (abrasion) on something in my garden. Both are following me around like newly hatched ducklings, I was reduced to watching Jeremy Vine (surprisingly interesting) just so they would both sit still and stop fighting for "the bone", "the dog bed" and adored adult...My little dog was so sweet, when other dog hurt its paw, he started licking him instead of quarrelling..

I'm not surprised Haudin - after the death of her grandma it must be very difficult for her to settle down. But that is very good she is able to face lectures, that is the most important part of studying - to bother to go at all. When I felt low, that was the hardest thing, to go into a room full of people when you knew no-one necessarily noticed if you were there or not (I'm not sure how her uni is on that score; presumably lecture halls are enormous) Could you go up for a week, and just be in the shadows, normalise things, or are you looking after ds/other commitments.

Dh is meeting ds for lunch today at uni, he has a business appt in that town. Ds has form for talking a lot of puff/bravado fuelled inconsequential stuff, it is very difficult to find what is really going on with him. I'm hoping that meeting someone for lunch was a good for his sleeping patterns at least. Freshers still on I think.We have heard nothing otherwise..

Bronze the advantage of having your own kitchen is that he can now be the "hub" and invite people over without inconveniencing any flatmates.

2nd year is a whole new ball game many problems solved and then new ones!

NoHaudin
Good that she has been assessed, but I can see how worrying that must be for you.
DS's health is not perfect but is stable. He has decided to stop taking his medication and has promised me that he will see the GP if he becomes worse.

NoHaudin it would be totally understandable if you had a good cry. That is something real to be worried about. It's so hard parenting these teenagers sometimes. X

Good to hear of all the settling in stories. I hope those with issues get them ironed out soon and can enjoy second year.

I am not weeping and wailing but I am very worried about dd. It appears that her mental health was much worse at the end of last year than I had realised. I knew she was struggling a bit but didn't know (because she didn't tell me) that she was unable to study for any of her exams and only passed because she had gone to lectures and managed to soak up information in a sponge-like way.
Having improved over the summer, things are getting worse again.
She has had an initial assessment from mental health services but has been warned of long waits before any treatment starts. Her symptoms aren't straightforward so it isn't even clear what the best treatment would be.