DD wants dance career but not sure she’s good enough!

She may not become a professional ballerina but it may lead onto other things - cheoreography, teaching, theatre production, etc.

I don't see why you're afraid, op. Disappointment and handling rejection are a huge part of life. You will be there is help her deal with it.

Horrendously badly paid sadly. Even Carlos what’s his face, the ballerina, said dance should be your side hustle.

I think she's a bit young to be dampening her enthusiasm and expecting her to be realistic. Dance is fantastic exercise, so I'd be encouraging her to continue.

There are plenty of careers connected to dance that she could explore later if she's interested - the obvious ones are dance teacher (running her own dance school), choreographer. Then there's a host of careers in theatre / production manager / tour manager or music including engineering, costumes, sets, working on music videos, talent agent or manager, PR etc etc etc none of which involve performing.

She just 10 years old. Reality will hit home soon enough that she will not be a professional dancer when she grows up.

Can you emphasise to her that dance is one facet of sport/ athleticism ; and there are many possible futures for athletic powerful persons. Dance, yoga, sports, teaching any of them , health and well being careers , personal trainer. Physiotherapy, medicine, nutrition. Anything is possible and the best path at age 10 is to keep all options open as long as possible. This includes, her school studies; sciences, human biology, health and nutrition, psychology. The world is her oyster, don't specialise too soon.

Has she thought of another dance genre like latin or ballroom?

At ten I was convinced I was going to be an Olympian competing for Judo lol, at 25 however I’ve got two degrees and work in recruitment. My sister on the other hand wanted to be a lawyer at 10 but is now studying musical theatre at a prestigious arts school. My point being, don’t dampen her dreams so young, she will work things out as she gets older! I’m grateful my parents endorsed my Olympian dreams while I had them and let me realise on my own that perhaps it wasn’t quite the right path for me 😂

Keep up the dancing at hobby level and make it clear that it's a competitive industry with even great dancers not getting jobs.

There is a difference between being realistic and crushing hopes and dreams.

Just let her do what makes her happy and encourage her.
dont try to give her a reality check, you’re only saving yourself not her and that’s selfish.
you can tell her you’re proud of her, tell her you’re proud of how well she’s doing, how hard she’s working etc. You can help her confidence and self esteem so that if / when she gets rejections she can bounce back easier.
and you can also tell her she needs to get GCSEs because that’s also important because any job, including any dance related job will likely expect them.
you don’t really need to worry past that point for a while.
the worst case is she enjoys exercise, learns to work hard and be dedicated to something
and maybe she’ll find a career in dance but just not what she’s planning right now. Or maybe it’ll just be lifelong hobby and exercise that she enjoys.
or maybe she’s 10 and she’ll get bored and find a new hobby
but at least she’s doing what makes her happy and working hard at it, that seems admirable to me

Having the 'right build' is also about muscle structure and other things. That's just the genetic lottery and getting lucky.

We were told at the time that they must be in a full time training program by the time they are 15, but there are exceptions out there.

If your daughter is thinking of auditioning for one of the pre-professional ballet schools for high school she'll soon find out just how competitive it is.

And even if she manages a career in dance, it tends to be a short one, so will need to have stuff in the bag for later. An older friend of mine had a good career in classical ballet (soloist with some big companies), had her career cut short by a catastrophic onstage accident, and aged 35 had to go back to a tutorial school and do GCSEs and then A-levels, because she had no qualifications at all (I don't imagine that would happen now, but my friend is in her 70s).

I offer this in case it helps you talk with your DD about the necessity of also focusing on the academic side of her education while she is serious about dance.

I guess my clues about her talent come in the fact no competition invite / rejections for things she had auditioned for, and she’s very upset each time, but never wants to stop dance or give up auditions.

My dc did the same.
Its ok.
They learnt to bounce back. They still enjoyed the sport. Often, they got enthusiastic about the same thing than their friends - who were better. Friends got selected, dc didn’t.
dc still enjoyed the sport.

The fact she is getting upset isn’t a sign that she should stop.

Also a reminder you can really enjoy a sport, spend a hell of time in it but not want to make it a job.

She doesn’t have to find a sideway entrance to still be involved in dancing even if she isn’t good enough to do ballet or whatever.

Maybe with reminding her at that stage that’s it’s about enjoying herself! And that most people change their minds between 10yo and 20yo.
Hell having all the dcs in my family at Uni now, I’ve seen many students changing their mind during their Uni course too!

Dont close the doors for her at this stage but encourage her to enjoy what she does. I think it’s you there that needs to not take what your dd says to Seriously. Support her. Don’t make it who she will be for the rest if her life.

No experience with dancing but I have experience with swimming and another sport.

At that age, they have loads of dreams. Let her follow them if you can. She’ll learn to be resilient, to make some efforts to reach her goals etc… she will learn to deal with disappointment and bounce back. It’s all ok and will help her become a rounded child.

Will she become a professional dancer? Who knows!!
Having seen 4 dcs (between mine and their cousins) doing that, by the time they sat their A levels, they knew what was or wasn’t possible. So carrer in their chosen sport was a NO. They started Uni and actually all bar one stopped that sport….. A mixture of reality of the time needed for their course, not being selected ‘for the squad’ even though they all assume it would happen and discovering other sports/interest/people.

Don’t think too far ahead. Let her go for it. Let her enjoy her passion. Just remind her that regardless of her profession, she needs to do well at school (and explain why! Plus expectations if course). Whether this would become her profession isn’t a question to ask for another 10 years or so!

This is it exactly. I have two DDs and one wanted to be an astronaut and the other with wildlife (like David Attenborough). They are unlikely to end up doing exactly that. However, I encourage them to study for their dreams but mention often that no one can predict what the job market will be like in 10 or 20 years. They'll be able to find something related to their passion. For your DD, it could be a dance related career. There is so much you can do with dance or the wider performing arts.

I have experience. First, does she have the build and muscle structure for it? That was evaluated for potential at the auditions we went to. Second, if she isn't competitive, she'll fall down at the dance school auditions. My daughter had to audition three years running before she got into elite training. Third, is she resilient? The dance world is harsh. Fourth, if I could do it again, I would never have allowed my daughter to start danc , but that's just me.

I'd stay quite neutral on her abilities- congratulate her successes but don't either bull her up too much or let her know you don't think she's the best. I like the stance of pointing out that dancing is a great career but an uncertain one for anyone so she needs to ensure it's not the only thing she's aiming for. School needs to be encouraged too. If she's doing her best but not at the standard of the best girls in the group or getting the same opportunities then I expect she will start to either realise that herself soon and ease off the idea or her hard work will begin to compensate.

The ones getting into associate schemes at this age are quite likely to be hyper mobile and therefore have exceptional flexibility. This often leads to over training and injury at quite young ages, especially during puberty. So at the moment tbh I'd be thankful that she's not being seen as one of the 'chosen ones'. Instead, concentrate on supporting her enjoyment, eg doing as much as is enjoyable of various styles, and building her strength. She'll find her niche over time if she loves dance - it could be contemporary, acro, Broadway, or going into teaching or chorey. There's absolutely no reason to conclude that she 'won't make it' at 10 - there are a lot of different versions of 'making it', and if she's really passionate about it she'll find the right one for her

I want to set some realistic expectations without dampening her enthusiasm No no no. Just support her without making rash promises and let her learn for herself. Also ask yourself why you want a child of ten to approach life with the cynical realism of a 30+ adult? What are you trying to achieve by being a naysayer? She is currently 10, next she will be 11, soon enough she will be a realistic 15yo.

The reality is that most serious professionals have to work very very hard. There is a major myth about 'natural talent'. Practice practice practice.

It is absolutely awful of you to judge whether she can do it or not - you have no idea. It will depend on her level of commitment as much as 'talent'.

There are professional dancers working today who did not start until secondary age.

she’s talking about wanting to apply for a local dance high school that a lot of the older girls at her dance school go to Good idea of hers. Your job is to support her with the outcome.