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Extra-curricular activities

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Duke of Edinburgh bronze in a pandemic and 14yr old, moan alert

30 replies

megletthesecond · 23/06/2021 18:02

DS's school got them started on D of E bronze in March. They sorted out the 2 day hike which was a good start. He loves that sort of thing.

Since then DS has not been able to sort out anything physical, volunteering or a skill. His karate and army cadets haven't been helpful. All his mates have families and friends who have contacts to help and I have no one, a job and a violent younger sibling who consumes so much of my time. Parkrun would be every week but I can't commit to it we only do it a couple of times a month usually.

This is taking up so much of my time reminding him to sort stuff out and see what he can do. I can't drive him somewhere every week which rules out a lot. It does feel like the kids need a lot of support and time given to them to get them through this. I didn't realise I was signing myself up too Hmm.

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BlowDryRat · 24/06/2021 22:00

Skills: online course

Sport: he takes his log book to karate every week for his teacher to sign

Volunteering: parkrun restarts soon and there are volunteering opportunities that don't require you to actually be there, e.g. writing the run report. Litter picking as PPs have said. Local community garden. The local council's parks department can sort him out with some digging. Listening to year 7 pupils read. The website justserve.com has local volunteering opportunities, big and small.

BingleDiBing · 24/06/2021 21:32

Volunteering = litterpick. My DS did it for three months.

Skills = did a digital version of the DofE https://idea.org.uk/ for developing skills and employability

Physical = he was in a swimming club coach signed it off.

His friends have done walking and jogging. He’s now doing cycling for silver.

Agree with pp ideally he should be organising himself. In reality it will need a bit of input from you to start with on the bronze - now my DS is on silver he’s sorting it all himself.

CMOTDibbler · 24/06/2021 21:28

My ds has done an online science thing for his volunteering and really enjoyed it. He did a Joe Wicks DVD twice a week for physical, and coding for skill.
It didn't need anyone else to help him

CakeIsMyFavouriteAndBest · 24/06/2021 21:28

My daughter is also 14 and only has the hike left to do (has done practise one though)
She contacted the local council and went litter picking every week which they signed off for her. She also did running every week for physical (recorded and signed ny her pe teacher) and online baking classes for skill (noted all of them and signed by food tech teacher).
We haven't had to drive her anywhere, she arranged and chose it herself. It is doable as her friends are all doing different things too. Just need to look at alternatives due to the current circumstances.

Evvyjb · 24/06/2021 21:22

Use the DofE opportunity finder - I'm DofE coordinator and loads of my cohort have used this. Opportunities online and in person.

Honestly - he needs to do it himself! If I had a student telling me repeatedly that they hadn't got replies I would simply say to try elsewhere!

DownToTheSeaAgain · 24/06/2021 21:19

Best!

DownToTheSeaAgain · 24/06/2021 21:18

@AlexaShutUp

Tbh, if your ds isn't bothered, I'd just leave it. It's his award, not yours. Maybe it isn't important to him?
This is the beat advice.
Jeeves93 · 24/06/2021 21:15

Who exactly did he email at army cadets? Are you sure he emailed the right person? It is usually best for him to speak directly to his detachment commander. DofE is usually pushed massively so they should be able to help.

DrIrisFenby · 23/06/2021 21:42

Volunteering - Google online Citizen science projects.

My DD is helping with a scientific research project for an hour a week via Zooniverse helping to identify animals on the Serengeti from photos.

greenlynx · 23/06/2021 21:38

Are you in any FB parents groups, even for your youngest? Can you ask there? Or do something for neighbours?

Namechercanged · 23/06/2021 21:30

Has he asked fave to face at karate or cadets?

aramox · 23/06/2021 21:27

Tbh it's all very well saying the kids have to organise it but all the ones I know have needed substantial parental input.

traumatisednoodle · 23/06/2021 21:02

Ds made cakes signed off by a neighbour for his skill, could your DS do somethimg similar ? Are there any groups for younger DS perhaps he could volunteer (if you'd be there anyway)?

Stevenage689 · 23/06/2021 20:55

Does your DS go to karate and cadets? I'm just confused why it was just an email. If he goes, can't he just ask? It isn't a lot of work signing off.

It really needs to be him organising it. Please don't allow him to make you feel guilty about this.

megletthesecond · 23/06/2021 19:20

I'd rather he did it now. He's already feeling miserable that his mates have families who are helping and have sports clubs who can sign off sections. He doesn't have any of that and I feel so bad for him, hence me scrabbling around trying to figure out what he can do.

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lilyofthewasteland · 23/06/2021 19:16

The point of DofE is that he takes responsibility for choosing, planning and arranging each section. Not that you do it for him and then he just shows up.

He has until he's 25 to complete it! If he's not ready at 14 then leave it for now. It's not going anywhere and he can pick it up later or do silver or gold as a direct entrant when he's a bit older.

megletthesecond · 23/06/2021 19:09

ara an on-line course might work. I started us kn the money saving expert OU course during the first lockdown but he never finished it. Might see if there's another one he might like.

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aramox · 23/06/2021 18:50

There's loads of ideas on the d of e website for 'alternative ' routes. Volunteering can be online. Sport can be walking measured on phone. Skills can be an online course. School teacher can be the assessor. I bet he'll figure it out with a bit of support.

Feelinghothothottoday · 23/06/2021 18:49

Litter picking every week. Black bin bag and a picker. Get a neighbour to sign it off.
Voluntary work in a charity shop?

AlexaShutUp · 23/06/2021 18:46

Tbh, if your ds isn't bothered, I'd just leave it. It's his award, not yours. Maybe it isn't important to him?

megletthesecond · 23/06/2021 18:45

alexa "What is your ds doing to identify opportunities?". Nothing anymore, his cadets and karate never got back to him. He sent a nice email asking if they'd sign things off and heard nothing back. I'm going to have to do it and see if they will help.
The teacher never got back to either of us when I said he'd come to a dead end.

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MadeForThis · 23/06/2021 18:36

If your ds doesn't care then you can't do it for him.

AlexaShutUp · 23/06/2021 18:26

Are there no buses that he can get to places?

When you say he doesn't care, do you mean the teacher or your ds? I'm sure that the teacher cares, but was it not made clear to your ds when he signed up that he would need to take some initiative? It isn't supposed to be the parents doing everything for them!

What is your ds doing to identify opportunities?

GreyhoundG1rl · 23/06/2021 18:25

Part of what your ds should gain from doing something like DofE is the opportunity to take responsibility for stuff and use his initiative. You shouldn't have to do it for him. Yes, it's a bit harder in the pandemic, but a lot of things are open again now. Let him try to sort it out himself - it will do him good!
All of this.

They really don't need the sort of input you seem to be giving, it's fairly pointless if he won't / can't manage without it.