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Extra-curricular activities

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Original poster

Dd very wobbly over performance this week. Help !

28 replies

Didiplanthis · 09/12/2017 21:10

Hello. Dd is doing her first solo violin performance in the school carol service this week and having been note perfect for weeks is now forgetting the notes, squeaking and catching the wrong strings. She's got in a right state tonight sobbing and saying she's going to get it wrong etc. Everything I say is wrong. If i say it will be fine she points out all the things she got wrong tonight. If i say no one will mind if she goes wrong then i think she will get it wrong too. Any ideas how best to deal with this ?

OP posts:
Trumpetboysmum · 10/12/2017 07:49

Taggie that's brilliant advice and I shall no doubt be needing to share it with ds in the coming days when he has his inevitable panic about his Christmas concert solo
I really feel for your dd did I I will also be telling ds in the coming days that ( apart from you who will have heard the piece loads) no one will notice if she makes a mistake as long as she keeps playing . Ds's teacher also helpfully always points out that everyone has a nightmare at some point and it really doesn't matter- not that I think that is actually that helpful for our dc's but hopefully helps them to keep it in perspective . Ds's teacher also will never let ds over practice a piece so I reckon hardly playing it before the concert might work - I always worry about this approach but it does work. 😀
Good luck to your dd x )

Original poster
Didiplanthis · 09/12/2017 22:18

Thank you so much. That's really good advice. She's the youngest playing so no one will care anyway as she looks cute !

OP posts:
TaggieOHara · 09/12/2017 22:04

Poor thing :-( . My DS2 plays the violin and also gets nervous. A few thoughts

  1. It is very very common for DCs to get jittery and play worse in the days leading up to a performance or exam. It doesn't mean that they will play badly on the day.
  2. Tell her that even professionals make mistakes, especially early on in a performance. The key is that they play on as if nothing is wrong. She must expect to make mistakes and plan to keep going
  3. The important thing is not how 'well' she plays but how much the audience enjoys her performance. A few smeared string crossings and out of tune notes will not dampen their enjoyment if she feels the spirit of the music.
  4. Along the same lines... the audience are not there to assess her/be impressed by her/ be horrified by her technical errors. They don't care how advanced or accomplished she is.
  5. On the day, she should try to reframe nerves as excitement. The feelings are very similar. She should also know that all performers feel nerves/adrenaline before they play in public. She should also plan a very simple warm up if possible. A couple of scales and playing through her solo slowly if possible.

Very best of luck! Let us know how she gets on!