(Mostly) August Music Thread

We have the white/black shirt thing, the only real issue is keeping track of who plays in what. What with that and the ties/bow ties I'm glad that he's of an age now to sort himself out. We still have the odd occasion where he comes down, takes one look at his father and swings round on his heel to change shirts but it doesn't happen as often as it did.

Drummers we have the same here different outfits for different ensembles ( ds quite often has to quickly change between groups when they are performing - which then means that he doesnt look as smart as he could )

I received requirements from jd recently. The shirt for orchestra is white but for percussion ensemble it has to be black... His black trousers from Easter will be small now. So we also have to visit some shops...

Shoes are now Converse-alikes in summer and walking shoes in winter. It's brilliant, although he still needs concert shoes he doesn't have to buy them at back to school time.

Shows=shoes....

You can book an appointment at Clarks I think. I have sorted out DD2's school shoes already. Partly because she needs smart shows for NCO - and partly because she had actually worn a hole in the sole. And her feet had grown a whole size. Oops!

Truffle and I'm putting it off - for now anyway will need to go soon though

Oh yes, I certainly don't miss the Clarks pilgrimage. One year, back when my boys were 5,6 and 7, we took our ticket and got in the queue. There were loads ahead of us.
We went to a cafe over the road, had a sit down meal and came back to the shoe shop without missing our turn. In fact I think there were still half a dozen to go.

Oh yes Prada I know what you mean, I used to get his Startrite at John Lewis and it was hell before the school year!! I'm so happy he now buys men's shoes in regular shops. The time will come for you too!

Niggle - glad all sorted!

Drummers - that sounds bed like a lovely day. We've been shopping also but for school shoe and bag shopping today. Even this early in the holidays, Clarks was like Dante's 7th circle of hell. We left and went to another shop!

I have never sat in on a lesson either ( the odd bit when his teacher wants to show me something) if I sat in on lessons it would only lead to arguments with me and ds afterwards if I corrected what he was doing - it's bad enough now when I remind him to follow his teachers instructions ( rather than give himself a little concert when he's practicing)

raspberry all the best to him
We have been shopping for mallets and sticks this morning. We happen to live 10min walk from London's best percussion shop... As DS said this morning, "isn't it amazing?". His timpani hard mallets cost 37 pounds, the marimba hard were 33 pounds. The cost. And he's now paying everything from his own pocket money savings! Grandparents are buying him a cymbal bag as reward for his end of year grades (we never reward, bribe or anything but they do lucky for him )
I have never sat in a music lesson. Only when DH was teaching him piano of course, I was at home. But never sitting there. I don't think any of his teachers would've liked it. In drums, I sit in the next room when I go, now he mostly goes alone.

Raspberry: all the best to his treatment!
Kutik: no experience and never thought of it. I dont mind to blow my savings if she is keen and into it though. Its more a pleasure to pay.
Niggle: could be because your teacher was stressed and feeling pressurised. We usually try to hide our excitement about learning for the next exam for couple of months. There are usually non-exam pieces for couple of months. Hopefully your daughter doesnt feel disappointed/confused. Mine loves exams, she got excited for it and practise for it. I am lucky my piano teacher understands and talks to me. My previous violin teacher never answer my emails and dont talk to me. They say all is written in notes(to be fair they did write detailed notes). For non-musical mom like me, their notes are foreign language to me. I want command, tell me where she is, what I need to do to supervise and check on her during the week.

Same here Fleur - DS2's piano teacher likes me to be there as I make notes and we can decide on what DS2 should do at home! He is probably just as cheeky whether I'm there or not, to be honest! I think his teacher really understands him, though.
Niggle glad she apologised but I would start the long search for another teacher!
Raspberry I do hope your poor DS recovers very soon.

Niggle glad to hear all is sorted. Maybe she just had a bad day, we all have one from time to time.

I sit in dd's piano lessons at her request, it started that way because she only ever had private lessons, initially because her teacher advised so as she was 6 when she started, her teacher believes in initial parental support when they are young, as the time went by I tried to stop attending but dd asked me to stay. Then I thought as dd is turning 10 next month I should stop attending now, dd again said she prefers me there and the teacher just said "it's working well, why changing if there's no real reason behind it?"

We do share a joke between the three of us that I am dd's PA, sometimes I am asked to take the notes in lessons, sometimes I just make a mental note of some requirements when the teacher is teaching dd something new. This then enables me to ensure dd is prectising as her teacher asked her, as an example there have been occasions when the teacher said "practice only bar 19 very slowly" and dd is trying to ignore it and plays through the entire piece, I can remind her what she asked.

Of course this can be done through the practice diary so there isn't a right or wrong answer, it just works for us so I'll wait for dd to instruct me to not attend lessons when she's ready. She does love her teacher, she actually said so last night when doing her practice.

The down side of this is that sometimes dd feels that my presence enables her to be more vocal in lessons such as acting a bit silly, closing the book when she's had enough of a piece practice, an attitude of "my mum is here so you can't tell me off". I know this wouldn't happen if I wouldn't be there as there have been occasional lessons when I didn't attend and the teacher's feedback was that dd is very quiet when I am not there. But that is why she said it is better when I am there as she does want dd to be vocal as she's an introvert.

As I said I don't think there is a right or wrong answer, it's whatever suits best.

Niggle pleased the teacher apologised hopefully it's all sorted now . Sounds like the autumn term will be busy for your dd so no harm in waiting till spring for grade 5

Raspberry, sorry to hear about the injury and teeth problems.

I know absolutely nothing about trombones, but I do know with braces that the teeth feel slightly numb and sore after each visit to alter the tightness of the tracks. This lasts 1 to 2 days before the teeth adjust. So maybe just for a few days after each 6 to 8 week visit, it might be more troublesome.

I'm so pleased your DD's teacher has apologised. It's a bit worrying that she is nicer when you are there though!

Morning, growing teeth and wind instruments is a whole area of problems I've never considered! DD had weekly clarinet lessons with her whole class in Y4 last year and quite liked it, but not as much as the violin/piano. She also has a stammer which can be quite severe and I thought, possibly wrongly, that instruments not reliant on her mouth muscles would relieve her of the stress of that.

DD's teacher asked me to be at lessons and DD herself prefers it (said teacher is nicer when I am there). Thanks so much for your feedback. I received a long email this morning from the teacher, with an apology but saying she strongly believes g5 violin should be left to the spring, if we are doing g2 piano and g5 theory at christmas. I don't mind that.

I sent her an email outlining my plan 2 days before the lesson and didn't receive a response. I thought if she disagreed there would have been a reply and sorted it out that way. I hate any sort of confrontation and gave her a cue to say what she wanted to do. Instead of replying, it was all done in front of DD at a lesson and not particularly nicely.

DH says DD's wishes should come first, and I agree and obviously the teacher is looking for a compromise. Wish she had just emailed back though!

On this thread is it obvious there are no perfect teachers (or perfect parents!) but I do think any negotiation should be polite.

Oh dear. That post accidentally turned into a bit of a How many times can you use the word 'jazz' We also love classical music and like some other genres too. (sometimes in small doses though )

My DS has a diagnosis of 'mild' for want of a better word ASD. He was certainly not a selective mute but he definitely had communication difficulties, which some primary class teachers were much better or poorer at helping with. (Some teachers IMO exacerbated his difficulties unfortunately but that's another story.) I never usually sat in on his lessons either but he had a one off lesson at home with a fantastic jazz teacher. One of the things that struck me was how nicely he spoke to DS and how well DS spoke to him. His latest teacher (classical but very supportive of his jazz and all round development) says he is easy to communicate with and pleasant to work with. Presumably , like you say can't because DS has such a keen interest. Interestingly DS will often say after his lessons that they have been "useful" or "interesting". He discovered jazz independently of the family and his first teacher. It's very much 'his' thing. He teaches us about jazz. He's much more successful as a jazz musician than he would have been if he had continued purely with classical music. We support and encourage him massively and recognise the huge non-musical benefits it has given him.

I think instrumental lessons can give different children different things and parents often want different things from the lessons.

It's all fascinating.

Interesting. I have never sat in on my DC's lessons. Partly because they started in school, and once after school it was with the same teacher so the pattern of 'not beibng there' was well set by that point..

For my children, particularly DS (who had many ASD traits when younger, and spent some time as a selective mute, speaking to no adults outside the family), that 1:1 relationship with an adult outside the family, based on a mutual interest, has been one of the very best things about music tuition. Perhaps he might have made faster musical progress had I been there to listen in and then support practice, but he would have lost out in other ways - in particular their mutual love of jazz has taken DS off in directions that I could not have directed or supported him in.

I like parents to sit in on the lessons I do, especially the beginner lessons. Usually they don't though. Often they are within earshot which can also be useful, though it obviously doesn't allow for visual observation. I often ask a child to demonstrate something we've worked on to the parent who collects , partly in the hope that parents will remind their children of it during the week and partly to check that the child has understood and remembers. There's one mum who does a lot with her DC and I often compliment her on it.

There are some disadvantages to having a parent always observing however. Some children love having a purely 1:1 . It's their thing which gives them a small measure of independence and 'ownership' of their music-making. It all depends on the family though.

I try to have my pupils play more than 3 exam pieces so they have a choice. But this doesn't always happen. In your case I'd make a start on the pieces your DC had chosen and see how it went from there..... there must be someone who could accompany.

Hello to the other jazzers. DD has chosen a jazz piano module for her next year and is now lamenting the fact that her hands instinctively go into non jazzy chord shapes.

Kutik - very wise words.

raspberry very best wishes to your DS

raspberry DS2 had fixed braces for a year. For the first few days after they were put on, he was very uncomfortable and could only play the clarinet for a few minutes at a time. By the end of the first week he felt much better and could play for 30 minutes. Each time they were adjusted, he was uncomfortable for a day or two.