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Original poster

Terse exchange with woman - lane swimming

163 replies

SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 09:31

I've just joined a gym and have been using the pool in the evenings when it's quiet. It's not the biggest pool (20m x 8m) and is sectioned off lengthways, with half of the pool for classes and general use, the slower lane in one quarter and the faster lane in the other quarter. The lanes have boards at the end on the poolside showing the direction you have to swim in, and this is also covered in your induction.

When I got to the pool last night an aqua aerobics class was in the half sectioned off, so I swam in the slower lane. 2 people were in the faster lane, I was the only one in the slower lane. Around 25 minutes in, the aqua class finished and everyone left, although a few stayed in the pool. One woman got into the slower lane where I was, waited till I finished a length and asked if it was OK if we swam side by side. I wasn't sure what she meant, so said no, we're meant to swim in single file clockwise like the board shows. She wasn't happy and asked why, so I repeated what I'd said, and started swimming again. I was aware that she was close behind me, and when we'd finished a further 2 lengths she asked why we couldn't swim side by side. Again, I repeated what I'd said, and she wasn't happy - she said she was swimming faster than me, and it made sense. I said she was in the slower lane (it wasn't marked on the board last night for some reason, but I've seen here there before and it's always marked - plus we're told at induction which lane is which) and if she wanted to go faster she could use the faster lane where there was only one person swimming. Lots of huffing from her, before she reluctanctly moved into the faster lane where I could hear her complaining.

I spoke to the manager afterwards and asked if they could make sure the signs were on the board. They were really annoyed with her and said that the lanes are not wide enough for 2 people, that it's dangerous to swim side by side as people can be kicked, and that she absolutely should have been using the faster lane and not arguing with people in the pool. They want me to fill in an incident report. WWYD?

OP posts:
Hairissueshelp · 04/02/2026 14:32

I could not get annoyed about this to the point of making an incident report. How ridiculous.

Hellohelga · 04/02/2026 14:26

TranscendentTiger · 04/02/2026 10:53

This is really interesting! I lane swim multiple times a week at several different pools and I have never been asked by another swimmer to do side-by-side. If one person is faster, you let them by at the end of a length. A polite tap on the toes as you near the turn around lets the person in front know you're there if they haven't noticed. If it's quiet, you can often overtake mid way down a length if the difference in speed is huge.

Edited

This. Ive never been asked to swim side by side. I’d be confused and I’d say no too. Also the gym clearly indicates circular swimming.

TheRealMagic · 04/02/2026 14:21

BadgernTheGarden · 04/02/2026 14:18

Why didn't she just go ahead of you if she was faster? Or would she have caught you again too quickly. Storm in a teacup.

OP, from her description, doesn't appear to have allowed her to go ahead at the end of the lane, as per usual pool etiquette when you do have to swim in circuits and one person is faster.

BadgernTheGarden · 04/02/2026 14:18

Why didn't she just go ahead of you if she was faster? Or would she have caught you again too quickly. Storm in a teacup.

TheRealMagic · 04/02/2026 14:14

ArtificialStupidity · 04/02/2026 14:04

I bet she's given this far less headspace than you have

I don't know why you can't just acknowledge that side by side swimming is a perfectly reasonable alternative to circuits when there are only two people in a lane

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She probably did go home and have a quick moan about the weird woman who insisted on swimming in circuits!

TheRealMagic · 04/02/2026 14:14

I think you were technically correct but in practice an absolute pain. At my pool 'shall we just swim up and down?' when there are two of you in a lane is a courtesy/hypothetical question - everyone would think you were mad if you said no to it because it so obviously makes more sense than two people in a circuit. This is presumably why she didn't want to go in the fast lane with two people in it - there would then have been 3 of them so they would need to go in a circuit, with you alone in the slow lane, rather than the much more sensible option of two people in each lane swimming side-by-side.

AmberFawn · 04/02/2026 14:13

What an absolute drama over a completely reasonable and normal request. You were the problem OP

HushTheNoise · 04/02/2026 14:06

Side by side is much better for two people. No more chance of being kicked as usually at different speeds so only pass once each length surely.

ArtificialStupidity · 04/02/2026 14:04

SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 14:02

Mayb she was her enemy, who knows, but if you're a fast swimmer and there's a lane for fast swimmers - use it. Of, if there's a part of the pool that has plenty of room for you to fo your thing without having to get annoyed when a slow swimmer declines ypur request to swim side by side, use that instead. Don't huff about it.

Show quote history

I bet she's given this far less headspace than you have

I don't know why you can't just acknowledge that side by side swimming is a perfectly reasonable alternative to circuits when there are only two people in a lane

Original poster
SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 14:02

arethereanyleftatall · 04/02/2026 13:57

Maybe the other person in the fast lane was her enemy? Who knows op. Who cares. All anyone is saying is it’s a perfectly reasonable request for all the reasons already detailed, you could have easily accommodated it without any disruption to your own swimming whatsoever. You clearly don’t swim often so just take it from those of us who do that it’s a perfectly accepted, even preferred, way of accommodating 2 lane swimmers of different speeds.

Mayb she was her enemy, who knows, but if you're a fast swimmer and there's a lane for fast swimmers - use it. Of, if there's a part of the pool that has plenty of room for you to fo your thing without having to get annoyed when a slow swimmer declines ypur request to swim side by side, use that instead. Don't huff about it.

OP posts:
arethereanyleftatall · 04/02/2026 13:57

Maybe the other person in the fast lane was her enemy? Who knows op. Who cares. All anyone is saying is it’s a perfectly reasonable request for all the reasons already detailed, you could have easily accommodated it without any disruption to your own swimming whatsoever. You clearly don’t swim often so just take it from those of us who do that it’s a perfectly accepted, even preferred, way of accommodating 2 lane swimmers of different speeds.

WelcometomyUnderworld · 04/02/2026 13:57

SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 13:45

But she would have had to adjust her stroke every time she came towards me going faster than me, given the narrowness of tge lane, or overtaken me when she caught up with me from behind.

Or, she could have just done the common sense thing and gone into the lane more suited to her speed - or tge wider lane where she could have swum side by side without having to adjust/overtake.

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Do you not understand side by side swimming?

Let’s say you swim in clockwise circuits. She sets off before you and is a lot faster than you. Then at some point she is going to turn around and be swimming towards you in her clockwise circuit and you will cross paths (eg when you are at “3” of the clock and she is at “9”). She eventually laps you and is stuck behind you overtakes you (mid lap or at the end) but she will regularly be swimming past you in the opposite direction, and if she overtakes you mid lap she will swim past you in the same direction.

The exact same thing happens if you swim side by side, other than she never gets stuck behind you. So she never has to adjust her stroke, she goes up and down in one lane, so do you and you just pass each other more frequently.

But any lane with a circuit must have enough room for you to pass each other in opposing directions, so it’s impossible that it doesn’t have enough room to swim side by side.

Original poster
SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 13:53

ArtificialStupidity · 04/02/2026 13:48

No more so than if you were swimming in a circuit
And if there were two people in the first lane already and only one in your lane I don't think she was being unreasonable at all

I've swum my whole life in multiple different private gyms and it's always been the case that people will suggest swimming side by side of their only two people in a lane

Just because it is a new concept to you doesn't mean it was an unreasonable request

Edited
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I explained in a subsequent post there was one person in the fastwr lane. That person was going faster than me, but slower than the fast woman I spoke to.

I've swum in lanes loads of times - a fast swimmer has never got in beside me and wanted to swim beside me in the slow lane when there were 2 other more suitable options for them.

OP posts:
arethereanyleftatall · 04/02/2026 13:51

SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 13:29

Why would anyone want to swim side by side and then have to overtake or adjust their stroke to accommodate the slower swimmer on every length when there are 2 other lanes she could have used without having to do either - it makes no sense.

Edited

Have you read the responses? The why has been explained over and over. And in 2m there is plenty of space to swim side by side. 1m each.

I think you’re not understanding something to not get it, but I can’t work out what it is!

Original poster
SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 13:50

I didn't'report' it - I checked with the person at the desk (who I presume was the dity manager - it was later in the evening and she was the only person there) to make sure I hadn't been in the fast lane by mistake because I couldn't understand why a fast swimmer wouldn't just use the fast lane. She said I had been in the slow lane and asked if there was a problem. I told her about the conversation I'd had.

OP posts:
ArtificialStupidity · 04/02/2026 13:48

SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 13:45

But she would have had to adjust her stroke every time she came towards me going faster than me, given the narrowness of tge lane, or overtaken me when she caught up with me from behind.

Or, she could have just done the common sense thing and gone into the lane more suited to her speed - or tge wider lane where she could have swum side by side without having to adjust/overtake.

Show quote history

No more so than if you were swimming in a circuit
And if there were two people in the first lane already and only one in your lane I don't think she was being unreasonable at all

I've swum my whole life in multiple different private gyms and it's always been the case that people will suggest swimming side by side of their only two people in a lane

Just because it is a new concept to you doesn't mean it was an unreasonable request

FryingPam · 04/02/2026 13:48

I thought that’s the usual done thing when there’s only 2 people in lane. Once a third person joins you then go back to the official ‘direction’ and swim circles. I’m not sure why you refused or got upset about this?

latetothefisting · 04/02/2026 13:47

AmazingGraced · 04/02/2026 10:58

How on earth can you walk up and down? It's too deep!

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Have you literally only been to one pool in your entire life?

Did you not pause to think for a millisecond that between the two potential options here...either the poster is some sort of superhero who can breath underwater/walk on it like Jesus OR there just might be a pool that isn't as deep as the one you go to - and realise one is more plausible than the other.

It's actually quite hard to find a deep pool these days, health and safety (and more expensive).

OP I don't understand why, if she was faster than you why she didn't just go ahead, if you were slower than you wouldn't catch her up = problem solved.

It's pretty irrelevant whether other people swim side by side in their pools - you didn't want to and in that pool they don't like you doing it - so she was being unreasonable to huff about it.

Original poster
SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 13:45

Tempodrom · 04/02/2026 13:35

But you don't overtake or adjust stroke, you just stay in your bit of the lane. I don't understand how there is enough room to pass doing circuits but not to swim side by side Confused

Show quote history

But she would have had to adjust her stroke every time she came towards me going faster than me, given the narrowness of tge lane, or overtaken me when she caught up with me from behind.

Or, she could have just done the common sense thing and gone into the lane more suited to her speed - or tge wider lane where she could have swum side by side without having to adjust/overtake.

OP posts:
crazykatwoman · 04/02/2026 13:44

Agree with PP this makes no sense, there must have been room to swim side by side it’s literally no different to passing when doing circuits. And it’s a totally normal thing to do when only two people are using the lane, fine for you to say no if you really feel strongly but ridiculous to report to the manager and make a thing of it.

ChimpOnMyShoulder · 04/02/2026 13:38

Common sense says that if there is space to swim in a circuit there’s space to swim side by side if you are swimming at different speeds. Either way, I cannot see why this is an issue for going to the manager or making an issue out of it.

Talkinpeace · 04/02/2026 13:38

SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 13:29

Why would anyone want to swim side by side and then have to overtake or adjust their stroke to accommodate the slower swimmer on every length when there are 2 other lanes she could have used without having to do either - it makes no sense.

Edited

Eh ?

Person on left side of lane is doing head down crawl, 20 second lengths
Person on right side of lane is doing head up breast stroke doing 40 second lengths

Left person will pass right person quite regularly
they will be next to each other for one stroke every four lengths

Tempodrom · 04/02/2026 13:35

SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 13:29

Why would anyone want to swim side by side and then have to overtake or adjust their stroke to accommodate the slower swimmer on every length when there are 2 other lanes she could have used without having to do either - it makes no sense.

Edited

But you don't overtake or adjust stroke, you just stay in your bit of the lane. I don't understand how there is enough room to pass doing circuits but not to swim side by side Confused

ArtificialStupidity · 04/02/2026 13:33

SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 13:29

Why would anyone want to swim side by side and then have to overtake or adjust their stroke to accommodate the slower swimmer on every length when there are 2 other lanes she could have used without having to do either - it makes no sense.

Edited

Well in your op that wasn't the scenario at all and there was only one person in your lane and two in the fast lane

I just want to get in a pool and swim up and down when I go as do most swimmers. I wouldn't ever swim in the general swimming area unless I had no other choice

I am baffled how you can't grasp how much better it is to choose to swim side by side when there are only two people in the lane. You wouldn't be crossing any more frequently than swimming in circuits but neither of you would have to think about the other one's speed

Original poster
SirChenjins · 04/02/2026 13:29

Why would anyone want to swim side by side and then have to overtake or adjust their stroke to accommodate the slower swimmer on every length when there are 2 other lanes she could have used without having to do either - it makes no sense.

OP posts:
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