Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Exercise

Chat to other fitness enthusiasts on our Exercise forum.

Original poster

I just want to be left alone!

29 replies

Puncturedbicycle85 · 28/06/2023 07:48

Hi, I’m not sure I’m being over sensitive but it’s starting to annoy me. I am a member of a gym and go about 4 times a week. I do mainly weights when I am there. About a month ago, this guy who is a trainer at the gym came up to me and told me my squat form was bad. I did appreciate the pointers and have taken them on board. However, since then, I have been aware of him all the time. He is there every time I am there and even when he is with other clients, he will be looking over. If he needs more plates for his client, he comes to my squat rack to get them, even though there are another couple of empty ones in between. Yesterday he told me that I should use bumper plates rather than normal ones for my barbell deadlift (the main reason I didn’t was because the bumper plates were located just where he was training his client). I just nodded and got on with it. He had this chat with me while doing a training session with someone else. I never invite interaction and try to avoid him if I see him.

i know good form is important but mine isn’t that bad and I’m happy with what I am doing! I’m not seeking to get a PT at the moment and I don’t think I am doing anything dangerous or that will injure me. Is it too much to ask to be left alone? I feel really self conscious now doing movements because I know he is watching.

He has also explained one of his “tips” with “I just wanted to explain what you were doing wrong and that’s why you’re not getting any results” which I found quite offensive. How does he know if I am getting results?

by the way, im not suggesting that he fancies me or anything. I think he wants me to sign up for training and on his IG page he is always saying he has spaces for clients (apparently he specialises in women’s fitness). I just don’t want to do that and just want to be left in peace and feel like I’m not being scrutinised. Ugh. The gym chain has a branch near my boyfriend’s house so maybe I should change to that one instead.

OP posts:
Fraaahnces · 28/06/2023 08:06

Can you imagine the response if you went up to him and gave him some pointers while he was training someone? “Did you know that women who are not paying for your sessions do not want your unsolicited opinions about their bodies?”, ”Do you know that a lot of women change gyms because they feel like they can’t workout without being harassed by men?”

Divebar2021 · 28/06/2023 08:00

Well he might fancy you ! I work out with a PT and we see people around us all the time with poor form and he doesn’t feel compelled to go over and correct their form. I think some of these guys think all they need to have to be good at their job is knowledge of the exercises when in fact having good manner with people is half the battle. I think you’re probably being overly polite as women are conditioned to be and the PP is probably correct with her advice.

Original poster
Puncturedbicycle85 · 28/06/2023 08:00

Thanks for your advice. I will try being firmer - I’m a bit nervous of confrontation. I just wish people didn’t do stuff like this. You might think you’re being helpful but you could be spoiling someone else’s experience.

OP posts:
AndrexPuppy · 28/06/2023 07:52

YANBU to want to be left alone. He clearly isn’t getting the subtle hints so you either need to be firmer with him directly, speak to the gym manager about his approaches or just use the other branch. I’d suggest option 1, be firmer with him first. If that doesn’t work then try 2, then 3.