How to find a nursing home - not self funded / no hospice available

Where did she say that? She said MIL got NHS carers when come out of hospital - this is not the same as CHC and those carers are probably the DN team or the LA team all who will be trying to pass the care over to ASC as soon as they can.

As someone who covers EDT in the LA I work for, I assure you my advice is correct.

OP has confirmed this is NHS funded care. The duty social worker at Adult Social Care won't be able to do anything and even if it wasn't NHS care adult social care still can't put anything in urgently over a weekend - they are not an emergency service and will only be able to suggest hospital admission or the same support it sounds like the district nurses have already arranged.

Try calling social services emergency duty team if it’s become untenable at home. All councils will have one. Say family can’t cope and it’s carer breakdown. They can usually source urgent respite.

It won’t be free but if they have no savings she’ll have to pay an assessed contribution but this won’t be worked out until weeks later so you can look on the care cost calculator which will be on the council website for rough idea. There would be nothing to pay right now as that will be worried about later.

Ask DNs for fast track CHC as well as if they think she’s actively dying end of life they can put this in place some day/next day.

There is no expectation that you will pay for care or that they will pay for care either, so don’t worry about money.

Can you all manage as you are until Tuesday and maybe for a few days after that? If so, then social services is your best bet. It is their job to assess your mum’s needs, liaise with other services and find suitable care for her. It sounds as if she needs residential nursing care. Personally I would consider putting in a safeguarding report today (look on her council website) saying she is at risk of harm through unmet care needs and unpaid carer breakdown just to get the ball rolling.

If she has immediate medical needs (new pain, new worsening symptoms, new evidence of infection) then I would call 111 or 999. They will assess her and may be able to access services like hospital at home/urgent community care or will advise if hospital is the best option for her; they can also put in a safeguarding referral that carries weight because they are seeing with their own eyes what’s going on at home.

Try calling social services emergency duty team if it’s become untenable at home. All councils will have one. Say family can’t cope and it’s carer breakdown. They can usually source urgent respite.

It won’t be free but if they have no savings she’ll have to pay an assessed contribution but this won’t be worked out until weeks later so you can look on the care cost calculator which will be on the council website for rough idea. There would be nothing to pay right now as that will be worried about later.

Ask DNs for fast track CHC as well as if they think she’s actively dying end of life they can put this in place some day/next day.

Ask the hospice nurse ro check if there is an anticipatory drug chart, it's morphine, anti sickness and a light sedative.

She should qualify for CNC which will v likely fund the full cost of any care home. They can fast track this and can be sorted in a day. Also carers allowance. Been where you are and it's tough navigating the system and people will fight you but know your rights and don't give in. CNC is for people like your mum.

https://www.nhs.uk/social-care-and-support/money-work-and-benefits/nhs-continuing-healthcare/

Just to throw another horrible spanner in the crappy situation, if there is a house with enough equity they will put a charge against the house for the costs and claim it back when the time comes that it’s sold after FIL passes.
sending you love as it’s a horrible process 💐

@TinyMouseTheatre she’s been on continuous morphine patches for the last few months, I’m not sure if the GP have given anything else.

It can be GP, nurse, social worker AFAIK, has it changed?

Thanks for all of the messages, much appreciated.
To answer a few questions (sorry I can’t respond to all

• she was discharged from hospital after having the fall and fracturing her pelvis about 3-4 months ago, during which time she was also diagnosed with intestinal cancer, and the week before had been diagnosed with dementia
• NHS care package was put in place upon discharge from hospital, with 2 carers per day, in the morning and evening, plus SIL is there 5 days a week, and the other two days BIL, and DH and I / in the last few days, the hospice nurses have said they can come once a day, so three nurse/carer visits a day
• There is absolutely no money to fund a nursing home - the family just can’t afford it. SIL is their official carer so can’t work, BIL is retired, and DH and I don’t have any spare savings. Their house can’t be sold as disabled 95 year old FIL also lives there
• Hospital has been deemed not an option - GP said as she’s not classed as an emergency, she may be on a trolley in a corridor until they can find a bed. Given that’s she’s delirious and confused already, we feel it would be highly distressing for her. Plus, GP thinks she’s at risk of more infection in hospital. She’s already got a chest infection and bladder infection

DH is with her at the moment, and says she’s barely conscious and not eaten anything 🥺

TBH, we don’t think she has long, but the hospice people said otherwise.

Care homes near us charge £2200 per week for self funded people and if the residents themselves don’t have the liquid assets for three years the family has to guarantee the payments. That is obviously very expensive but brings more choice of location, more luxurious place.

If the state is paying, there will be reduced choice if any.

Apparently, SIL has asked the DN before for help in getting assessed for a nursing home place, but was told that she has very little influence on outcomes 🤯
DN is coming tomorrow to change bandages, so they’ll ask her again.

GP visited on Wednesday, and was pretty useless, and advised against hospital.
@ilovestayingin MIL worst fear is to go back in hospital, and the family would feel terrible taking her in, and her being in a noisy crowded corridor on a trolley, at risk of soiling herself, for up to 48 hours until a bed is free.

Apparently, SIL has asked the DN before for help in getting assessed for a nursing home place, but was told that she has very little influence on outcomes 🤯
DN is coming tomorrow to change bandages, so they’ll ask her again.

GP visited on Wednesday, and was pretty useless, and advised against hospital.
@ilovestayingin MIL worst fear is to go back in hospital, and the family would feel terrible taking her in, and her being in a noisy crowded corridor on a trolley, at risk of soiling herself, for up to 48 hours until a bed is free.

@Soontobe60 Really ? I had no idea . What about palliative care , is that not available under NHS . How awful . I guess I never had to deal with it and have often contributed to McMillan Nurses but never knew they were completely donation funded .