My mum has died

Oh gosh @PermanentTemporary I am sorry for your loss; it still is quite challenging, even though it was anticipated. Good for your mum, waiting for you. She probably knew that's what would help most.

I was in the same situation, I couldn't get home to be with my father and afterwards regretted it.

Having been with my mother when she died however, I have now very mixed feelings from a mental health point of view (I actually found it quite traumatic).

So sorry for your loss - it sounds like she waited for you x glad that you were together and she went peacefully

So very sorry. I'm sure it will be a comfort in the days to come that you were able to say goodbye.

Am so very sorry for your loss OP. Even when you are aware that it’s a possibility, nothing prepares you for the loss of someone you love and who has been such a meaningful part of your life.

Hope you have someone with you now to give you a hand-hold, but sending a hug.

I’m sorry for your loss @PermanentTemporary . I’m glad you were able to be with her at the end, and that she doesn’t need to struggle on anymore. Wishing you peace.

My friend worked in a hospice and believes that too, that some wait until they are alone and others want their family with them.

@PermanentTemporary I am so sorry for your loss but also glad you were with her. My siblings were with my Mum, we were all doing shifts to be with her and I drove to them in the middle of the night because I couldn't sleep, held my Mum's hand and she died a few minutes later so we were all with her.

That was a very long time ago and it can still hit me with physical pain to think of it but for the most part I am grateful I knew her as a woman and not just my Mum, she was a fantastic Grandma and I remember all the good things about her. I am sure you will find comfort in all the lovely memories you have of your Mum too.

I hope you have good supportive people around you

Aw, I’m sorry op. It’s tough. Glad she finally went and it was peaceful with you there. The constantly being called in for their last night/last moments, for them to rally round really takes a terrible toll. May she RIP.

I'm so sorry OP. You have given a lot to others on Elderly Parents. How lovely that you could be together with your Mum for her final moments xx.

I'm sorry to hear of your loss. You obviously had a very good relationship with your mum, and you sound like a caring, wonderful daughter.

Give yourself time to grieve, and in the future, remember that your mum would want you to be happy and to live your best life. xx

Bless you both. She waited for you.

My grandad did the same, waited until we were all at his house and then took his last breath with us all around his bed saying “you can go now, we love you”.

i’m so so sorry. She knew you were there with her. It is a privilege to have someone be with you as you pass. I also believe people come to “get” you when you pass, so there wasn’t a moment she was alone. You’ve been an amazing daughter to her.

I'm sorry for your loss. There will probably be lots of mixed feelings over the days, weeks, months ahead but I am so glad you were able to be with her and it does seem like she hung on until you got there. She sounds like a great mum and you are a wonderful daughter.

I’m so sorry for your loss OP. Please take gentle care of yourself 💙

She's free of pain and with the angels xx

Sending all my love to you, I’m glad you were able to be with her.

Thinking of you, be kind to yourself and give yourself as much time as you need 🌹

I'm so sorry for your loss. It sounds like you were a wonderful daughter to her, that must have meant so much.

@PermanentTemporary oh goodness. So sorry but such a lovely thought that Mum waited for you. I hope you can get some solace from the fact you were there with her. Another hug here and hope all the lovely memories can flood back over the hard past 5 years.💐

Condolences

Yes it sounds like she was waiting for you. What a lovely knowledge that you had a lovely mum.

So sorry for your loss. She's at peace with your dad now, so glad you made it in time, what a precious moment to be able to be with her as she slipped away 💐

Can I send you a big hug? 🤗
I know it’s generally frowned on around here.

Glad you were there at the end.

I heard a great programme on R4 a few years ago about people dying. I almost turned it off, but it was a very amusing and anecdotal about dying people either waiting for their relatives/ children to leave them alone so they could die in peace - or as your experience testifies - people hang on until someone arrives.

Your Mum obviously waited for you 🙂

Deepest condolences 💐

@PermanentTemporary sorry for your loss. You have been a source of comfort and wise words on the EP boards.

My heart goes out to you today. Even if it was expected or a blessing it’s going to take a while to sink in.

I’m so sorry for your loss, it sounds like she was a lovely mum x

Sorry for your loss. It’s good you managed to be there.

I’m sorry for your loss.
Did she have a good life?