We're looking to move ourselves as a family (2 older DC, me and DH) in the next couple of years, considering if MIL (widowed, early 80s) was to sell her large house we could combine to buy a much larger house possible with some kind of 'granny annexe' for her
However I'm having doubts. Firstly I don't get on with her that well. She can be critical and sometimes quite sharp, also negative in her outlook.
Very stubborn and set in her ways, won't take meds and won't consider doing things like PoA.
Also, this sounds awful, but I don't feel that I love her. I do DH and the DCs, but think to care for someone full time you really need to have that shared history and love them properly.
I don't mind going for coffee with her occasionally but feel that is about enough for me. I have a chronic illness myself too and late 40s, going through menopause.
With house prices as they are might have the teen DC at home as well for a fe years yet to think about as well.
Background is I am NC with my own mum, both my mum and dad have / had mental health problems (dad died last year) and were divorced, think I have a bit of cPTSD from growing up as well which I need to address.
I guess I am looking for some validation that I am doing the right thing to say no to this. MIL also has 3 children herself including 2 other siblings to DH neither of whom are working and both of whom have large houses with a spare room for her if she needed to stay with them for a while.