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Elderly parents
Original poster

If a parent goes into a care home will the LA come for some of the money from the sale of their house?

167 replies

Thebluespoon · 11/09/2025 09:01

Once the remaining partner (who is currently living in the house) dies?

I am not sure if I should have placed this thread in the Money matters section but thought there may be some people on here who have gone through this.

I am a bit confused following a meeting with my parents finanical advisor.

Mum has Alzheimer;'s, it's been 7 years since her diagnosis. She lives at home with my dad and between my dad, my sister and myself we have been helping to look after her. However, following an awful fall in June and subsequent hospital stay mum's dementia has progressed rapidly and she is now double incontinent and can only walk aided and even that is tricky. We now have private carers who come in 3 times a day.

We are hoping to keep mum at home for as long as possible but we are aware we are on borrowed time and there will come a point when the home carers are not enough and we will not be able to cope, at this point we will have no choice but to look into care homes.

Mum and dad have investments. Because of mum's recent change in circumstances Dad and I had a meeting with his financial advisor yesterday. My parents investments were changed after mum's diagnosis in 2018 and most of them are now in dad's name (all done under the financial advisor's advice). There is a fairly good chunk under mum's name but this wouldn't last too long if mum went into a care home tbh.

The financial advisor said as soon as mum's investments fall to below the £23,250 threshold the LA will step in and pay (obviously that will be after a full assessment).

Mum and dad own their own home and I know the LA can not force any sale of the house whilst dad is alive and resisding there but I was under the belief that if dad were to die or mum ran up a care bill which exceeded the amount she has in investments then the LA can take the remainding figure from the sale of the house (after dad passes away or if he were to die whilst mum is still in care). The financial advisor says this would not happen.

I am a bit confused as I hear constant stories of people in care homes having to sell their homes to pay for the fees or a large chunk taken out from the sale of a house once the remaining partner passes away and leaves the house empty.

Does anyone have any experience of this sort of issue?

Should also add that my dad's side of things are all in trusts, this was set up by their solicitor.

OP posts:
Original poster
Thebluespoon · 11/09/2025 10:39

sashh · 11/09/2025 10:17

I can't help you on the finances, but I just wanted to tell you this.

My grandmother had carers coming in several times a day. She was in a council flat and the council were due to put a new kitchen and bathroom in so she went in to a care home for two weeks while the work was done.

It was the best thing for her. Carers coming in would ask things like what did she want for her dinner and she would say a sandwich because she didn't want to bother the carers.

Once in the care home she would be told it was time for dinner, go to the table and be asked did she want chicken or fish (or whatever) and she would get a plate with her choice and veg on the side. She didn't go back to her flat.

When I visited she always seemed happy even though she could not remember who I was.

I think this is going to be our next step tbh.

I have been helping to care for my mum over the last 5 years and gave up work last year to help care for her full time but following the fall and hospital stay it has become a nightmare and I am verging on breakdown mode tbh.

We were hoping to keep mum at home until she dies, not for finacial reasons as some on here may believe but because we know she would have hated to go into a care home but there is only so much we can do and althought he carers are fantastic they are only here for an hour three times a day, that leaves many hours of caring for my poor dad, my sister and I.

OP posts:
Original poster
Thebluespoon · 11/09/2025 10:34

schoolstruggle · 11/09/2025 10:14

I think if your mum outlives your Dad and therefore inherits the house then it could be sold for care home fees but if your Dad outlives your mum it wouldn’t. I’d check with age UK as suggested above and it might be an idea for your Dad to update his will too. Updating the will won’t change the house position as I imagine they’ve held it as joint tenants so it automatically goes to the surviving spouse but your Dad’s individual assets can be distributed as he sees fit. I’m no expert just speaking from personal experience.

This is what I have been led to believe too so was a little confused after the meeting with the LA yesterday. I will contact Age UK, thank you.

OP posts:
limescale · 11/09/2025 10:34

sleepwouldbenice · 11/09/2025 10:21

Yes agreed. Wind your judgemental neck in

Show quote history

I think it’s the way OP has said “come for the house”. If she had asked “how do I find out about the involvement of the LA when it comes to parental assets and care home fees?” she may have got different responses.

Original poster
Thebluespoon · 11/09/2025 10:32

DiscoBob · 11/09/2025 10:14

Well I'd imagine they would as it's an asset. It wouldn't be fair for you to keep the money from the house while the taxpayer funds your mum's care.

I dont' wish to keep the money. My only wish is that we know what we are dealing with in advance (or as much as possible), if that means we will need to pay a bill to the LA after the death of our parents then that's fine.

I am not wishing to avoid anything or wish to keep or inherit any money, it is my parents money, not mine. I am going by my father's wishes and the advice of his solicitor and FA. I simply sit on the meetings and take notes. It is not my business to interfere with my dad's wishes.

OP posts:
Figcherry · 11/09/2025 10:27

Summerhillsquare · 11/09/2025 09:50

So your family with a financial advisor and solicitor arranged money including setting up trusts so that you could avoid paying for care home fees?

Well done for being the judgmental contributor of today.
You must be so proud.
I see you're closely followed by @limescale.

limescale · 11/09/2025 10:26

Wouldn’t your dad willingly and morally wish to pay for his wife’s care if he has considerable assets?

sleepwouldbenice · 11/09/2025 10:21

autienotnaughty · 11/09/2025 10:16

I’d assume it was more due to concern around mums capabilities at that time rather than a potential care home need in the future

Show quote history

Yes agreed. Wind your judgemental neck in

sleepwouldbenice · 11/09/2025 10:20

schoolstruggle · 11/09/2025 10:14

I think if your mum outlives your Dad and therefore inherits the house then it could be sold for care home fees but if your Dad outlives your mum it wouldn’t. I’d check with age UK as suggested above and it might be an idea for your Dad to update his will too. Updating the will won’t change the house position as I imagine they’ve held it as joint tenants so it automatically goes to the surviving spouse but your Dad’s individual assets can be distributed as he sees fit. I’m no expert just speaking from personal experience.

Exactly this. They won't "come after" the house £ unless something happens to your dad. Best wishes

jettisoned · 11/09/2025 10:19

It's possible the council will scrutinise the transfer of money made after diagnosis as there's no time limit on deprivation of assets. They may assess the fees as if your mother still has the investments. The rules are complex though. I'd seek advice from a different independent financial advisor.

Is the house owned as joint tenants or tenants in common?

Have a look at Beacon

beaconchc.co.uk

They offer help regarding applying for continuing healthcare funding and have lots of free advice on the process and how to apply. It's not an easy process but we managed to secure funding for my dad (after an appeal) so that no assets were touched.

sashh · 11/09/2025 10:17

I can't help you on the finances, but I just wanted to tell you this.

My grandmother had carers coming in several times a day. She was in a council flat and the council were due to put a new kitchen and bathroom in so she went in to a care home for two weeks while the work was done.

It was the best thing for her. Carers coming in would ask things like what did she want for her dinner and she would say a sandwich because she didn't want to bother the carers.

Once in the care home she would be told it was time for dinner, go to the table and be asked did she want chicken or fish (or whatever) and she would get a plate with her choice and veg on the side. She didn't go back to her flat.

When I visited she always seemed happy even though she could not remember who I was.

autienotnaughty · 11/09/2025 10:16

Summerhillsquare · 11/09/2025 09:50

So your family with a financial advisor and solicitor arranged money including setting up trusts so that you could avoid paying for care home fees?

I’d assume it was more due to concern around mums capabilities at that time rather than a potential care home need in the future

schoolstruggle · 11/09/2025 10:14

I think if your mum outlives your Dad and therefore inherits the house then it could be sold for care home fees but if your Dad outlives your mum it wouldn’t. I’d check with age UK as suggested above and it might be an idea for your Dad to update his will too. Updating the will won’t change the house position as I imagine they’ve held it as joint tenants so it automatically goes to the surviving spouse but your Dad’s individual assets can be distributed as he sees fit. I’m no expert just speaking from personal experience.

DiscoBob · 11/09/2025 10:14

Well I'd imagine they would as it's an asset. It wouldn't be fair for you to keep the money from the house while the taxpayer funds your mum's care.

Original poster
Thebluespoon · 11/09/2025 10:03

Summerhillsquare · 11/09/2025 09:50

So your family with a financial advisor and solicitor arranged money including setting up trusts so that you could avoid paying for care home fees?

We have no financial training or understanding, hence why we employ the advice of a financial advisor and solicitor, absolutely everything we have done as a family has been done under their guidance and in good faith.

The FA a member of the FCA and the solictors firm a local 100 year old company who also follow strict regulations.

OP posts:
Summerhillsquare · 11/09/2025 09:50

So your family with a financial advisor and solicitor arranged money including setting up trusts so that you could avoid paying for care home fees?

Original poster
Thebluespoon · 11/09/2025 09:36

Thank you AudiobookListener, that's really helpful. I will contact them.

OP posts:
AudiobookListener · 11/09/2025 09:11

Ring AgeUK or look on their website at their factsheets. They will know far more about this than a financial adviser. I got really good, detailed info from a few calls with their Helpline a few years ago. Be aware rules are different depending on whether your mother is in England, Wales, Scotland or NI.

You can also buy the Disability Rights Handbook which will tell you all the rules on means-tested home-care and care home fees.

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