What to do - driving

Yes, that’s right.
https://www.yorkshirepost.co.uk/news/crime/elderly-driver-jailed-for-18-months-for-killing-28-year-old-motorcyclist-in-horror-crash-3786306
Although many of them seem to get away with a suspended prison sentence as long as they give up their licence and express remorse.

Don’t forget too that the insurance is invalid if they drive when a doctor has advised them not to, so the insurance wouldn’t pay out for costs of any crash, treatment of victims etc.

I got in touch with the dvla about my mum without hesitation. We have a duty to keep people safe. My mum was furious with me of course but calmed down eventually.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Generally if they give up their licence they rarely get a custodial sentence.

Not necessarily. The man who killed my mum and the other poor lady got a suspended sentence.

You inform the DVLA and let them use taxis. That’s what their money is for. Don’t get sucked in.
My DM and another woman were killed by a pensioner ‘drifting’ into oncoming traffic. He survived, just, but couldn’t remember a thing about it.

We took a couple of spark plugs out of my mil’s car when she wouldn’t accept she needed to stop driving. My husband is a mechanic and he kept saying “l’ll fix it next week”…

If one of these elderly people killed someone and were had up in court I assume they could be imprisoned for manslaughter?

DH removed both sets of FIL's car keys, and later the car itself, when FIL was advised he no longer had the reaction times or physical fitness required for driving. He didn't appreciate the loss of independence, but as he was still mentally capable he could see the dangers, though I suspect that left to himself he might have decided he was still okay to drive short familiar routes.
It's very difficult when you're dealing with a more stubborn character. With other issues I would frame unwanted changes as something that needed to be done 'for now', or 'until you get back on your feet'.

My Dad was horribly reluctant to stop driving, but I took his keys off him after he had a minor bump in a car park and wouldn't admit to being at fault. He was furious with me for weeks afterwards but it was completely the right thing to do. His eyesight was simply too poor, and he did accept it eventually.

Yeah, all of this!

If you don’t, and he kills or injures someone - a lot of people would question why you didn’t do more to intervene.

This might be your best bet. Try to frame it that taxis are safer and stress free whilst waiting for it all to be 'sorted out'.

This is how you report via email ( it’s a web form)

https://www.gov.uk/contact-the-dvla/y/driving-and-medical-issues

personally I’d take the keys too!

Adding to the chorus of you have to take the keys away. BIL had to do this when FIL started having absence seizures and was in denial. He actually had one whilst driving, luckily was moving at very low speed in a side road and just rolled into the kerb. Very frightening to think of what could have happened. FIL was incredibly angry at the time but has come to accept it.

Another vote for remove the car (not just the keys).

You Dad will not stop driving

He may have a type of vascular dementia from disrupted blood flow or afraid to loose their independance.
Either way he knows he is not fit to drive but is in denial.

Your Mum is not able to drive either and not willing to accept the conflict which will happen if she has to stop Dad or drive herself.

Sadly what is happening now is advanced warning of how things are going to fall appart for a while.

They are now housebound this will have a massive negitave impact on memory and social skills.

On the being sucked in you need a "Not on the list" rule. You only do what you came over to do and then leave.

Long term you need a work out what they need to change to adjust to having no car and how to manage the "stuff" you are getting sucked into.

Nb they need to sort out the power of attorney for both money and health asap.

Plus check that you are listed as an authorised person on any service provider.

Channel 5 documentary, "Cause of Death – Licence to Kill

https://www.channel5.com/show/cause-of-death-special-a-licence-to-kill

FIL wouldn't give up until a police officer had a word with him. Might be worth a try.

Of course you know what to do, you just aren’t doing it! Just take away the keys/car and have done with it. Make her an account with a taxis firm so she can book and use whenever she needs to.

There was a programme the other day. A documentary on those killed by drivers who should have given up their licences prior to the accident.

It was heartbreaking. Can you try and get them to sit down and watch it with you?

Otherwise tell the doctor. Tell the police. And report to DVLA anon

Thank goodness my Dad realised for himself that he should not drive and asked me to arrange to sell his car. Just take away the keys, or drive the car to your house until it’s sold. He is endangering your Mum, pedestrians and other drivers. How would he feel if he had an accident? How would you feel knowing that you could have prevented it by taking away the car.
Just do it.

How did you do this? I think I need to do the same.

My husband's boss once bought a car off someone, he had about 15 minutes to look/buy/take away, as the daughter was selling it while her dad was at an appointment and he didn't know about it.....

I have been training my dad to use taxis. He hated the idea, but couldn’t drive for a bit (hip replacement) and I can’t drive so couldn’t be his chauffeur. Got him an uber account and got him introduced to his local taxi firm whose drivers he really likes.
The more he does it, the more he seems to realise the benefits.

My mother is 88 and has had several minor accidents in the past two years. She has always been a terrible driver but now is an absolute liability. No one else is prepared to tell her she needs to stop . I don’t know what to do.

I dobbed FIL in to the DVLA anonymously. They arranged a test drive for him, which he failed. He was furious but abided by it.