Why do elderly people refuse to drink sufficient fluid?

It might also be that drinking equals peeing and if getting to the toilet is a chore they avoid that too.

Food with lots of fluid like cucumber, watermelon etc can also help x

I always love the rose-tinted idea that people in the 50s/60s/70s ate great wholesome food. My working class grandparents existed on Fray Bentos tinned suet pies, tinned potatoes and tinned sweetcorn, with Angel Delight for afters.
Lunch was meat paste spread or cheap jam on spongy white bread with the crusts cut off, a pack of Golden Wonder and a Blue Riband biscuit. For special occasions a box of Mr Kipling fruit pies would be procured (and for something really special, the fondant fancies).

They literally ate this day in day out for decades! Never a fresh veg or a piece of fruit passed their lips! This was the standard diet on their estate and all of it was processed and tinned. Plus a pack of fags each per day. No wonder they all had horrible health problems to be honest. It really wasn’t the case that people didn’t eat processed food — more like the opposite. As today, fresh food was expensive and you needed the time and expertise to cook well. Poorer people in particular ate a terrible diet in postwar Britain — less Hovis ad and more Kwick Save!

Well this is what I got the last time I was in hospital in France:

Breakfast:

Plain natural yoghurt with a sugar sachet.
Apple compote.
Packet of biscotte (crispbreads)
Pat of butter.
Set sugar syrup in a little plastic box that called itself:
a) Jam
b) Made by a Greek God.
Bowl of hot water with chicory powder.

Lunch:

Beetroot in mayonnaise.
Mystery meat in a sort of Maghreb related lot of sauce with chickpeas and couscous.
More plain yoghurt and sugar sachet.
More Apple Compote.
An individually wrapped triangle of Camembert.
A bread roll.

Dinner:

Grated carrots in vinaigrette. Amusingly named as if they had been a victim of SA.
Mystery meat with mushrooms in a lot of sauce that might have been bourguignon.
More plain yoghurt with sugar sachet.
A very frightened looking refridgerated banana.

I was in there for quite a while but that's just a typical day's menu. From what I remember.

It was the ever present plain yoghurt with sugar sachet and apple baby food compote that really made an impression on me.

I would struggle to drink a litre of water a day and I am not elderly!
Fruit,jellies ,soup etc works to increase fluid intake .

If its the taste of water a few tiny grains of salt or a few tablets of tissue salt called natricum chloratum should help. But the person needs to be willing... If thery are stubborn like my father nothing will help.

A friendly but firm word from a doctor or trusted HCP can help in my experience. Unfortunately, if there are memory issues as well it doesn't last for long. My mother is on two types of medication that can cause dehydration if she doesn't consume enough fluids. I find I often have to help her drink the water, holding the glass while distracting her, but your FiL may not like that.

My grandad gave us all a scare on Christmas Day. I think it’s generational thing as well as him and my nan did not know you’re meant to drink a litre of water a day. I bought them those lite bottles in home bargains that have the time on them and they have been following it religiously. So 8am - get started 10 am keep going…

no sensible health professional will tell an old person to drink 3 Litres a day and it does not have to be water,. Tea coffee any liquid will do, as will soup and watery fruit like melon. How about a beer or Guinness?As people age they just don't get as thirsty and they often don't want water. If he is incontinent get some pads for him to wear.

I don't doubt it, but the responsibility is solely his imo, that's what I meant.

You mentioned he enjoyed a whiskey, would he have water in that? There are plenty of no alcohol substitutes around these days.

Same, we never had water with meals, and I didn't have a water bottle until about 10 years ago! I definitely didn't take one to school. At primary school you took a flask (maybe with squash) a carton of drink or, if you were really lucky, a capri sun! Definitely didn't drink water in class at school or college.

Does he like Guinness?
Their alcohol free version is identical to the real thing. I wonder if you could get him to have a couple of pints of that? Don't tell him it's not the alcoholic kind!

Also, your husband needs to be the one having words about showering etc not you.

There is no need to neck 3 litres of water - no one does that. 3 litres of fluid can be made up from tea, coffee, diluted fruit juices, squash, milk,and any alcohol less than 4 percent proof. Zero alcohol beer is particularly useful as most men will happily drink that! In addition, the liquid component of food, including soup, gravy and other sauces also counts, as does the fluid found in fruits and vegetables. The thirst mechanism works less well in older people and this can be further exacerbated by some medication. Mobility issues and the fear of accidents also makes the issue worse. Forget the water and give him whatever he enjoys drinking or eating instead and make him a cuppa whenever you have one and h is hydration will improve no end!

Also warming up fruit juices helps.

Cold drinks can be unappealing. Apple juice warmed up with a pinch of cinnamon etc.

My Mum is ninety five and I am caring for her after a hip replacement, getting her to drink is the work of a whole family! I know why she won't drink, fear of accidents and because it hurts to walk to the loo , even though the doctors have all told her she must walk.
She hates water, so I keep on offering different herbal teas, elderflower cordial, apple juice etc etc, the only thing I can reliably get her to drink is those teeny tiny bottles of yakult ( which she loves) I sneak in one bowl of soup a day, and try and give her lots of milk on her cereal and keep a supply of yoghourt in the fridge, I figure every bit of liquid helps.

Great idea about the alcohol free drinks.

Also, think of foods which have a high water content:

• soups/broths
• risotto
• stews
• cucumber, melon, watermelon, oranges

Agree with a PP that an extra cup of tea might be preferable to drinking cold water.

That generation often didn't even drink water with meals...it was somehow frowned upon (guzzling)!

Can’t say I noticed it being sloppy when I was in for 3 weeks a couple of years ago. In fact, with the exception of some seriously mushy broccoli, I was very pleasantly surprised at how palatable it was - that is when I felt like eating again. Alas I have put back on the 5 or so kg I lost. 😟

Habit. My b. 1933 mum drank four to six cups of tea a day. That’s all. She (TMI) pee’d maybe twice a day.

I recall her laughing about a prospective buyer for the house next door she watched from an upstairs window; got out of his car to greet the agent, walked to the door- then raced back to his car to get his waterbottle. For a 20 minute visit.

In the 60s we had 1/3 pint of milk to drink between 9-3.30 at school, and maybe one glass of water with lunch.

Older people just aren’t accustomed to modern water intakes.

I think I've just had an epiphany here. Is this why so much hospital food is sloppy? Were they trying to get fluids into us without us noticing it in our weakened state?

I'm fairly old now, always been an under drinker and recently passed a very painful kidney stone. I need to drink more. What I've found works for me is one of those large glasses with a lid and wide straw in it. When the water is room temperature I can drink a fair bit without too much trouble at all, much harder when it's chilled.

The lid stops the cat sticking her head in, not sure if she ever uses the straw though.🐱

it really depends on the 'kidney issue though' -there is no such thing as a 'standard' fluid intake. Acute and chronic renal impairment have different needs. Pre-renal, post-renal and renal causes of impaired kidney function have different needs. Patients with really naff kidneys may in fact be fluid restricted to around 1L a day.

3L/day is a starting point quoted in basic medical text books for an average sized healthy man, but in reality a person's fluid requirement is based on their weight, other co-morbidities (heart failure often goes with renal impairment in older folk and that can really complicate things), electrolytes, medications and fluid output (which is where your stoma is clearly significant). In reality, 3L of water a day would be enough to render a lot of elderly people hyponatraemic, fluid overloaded and really unwell.

You can also get alcohol free shandy as well, which he might like. And the idea of warm/hot Ribena is a good one too.

They don't want to pee and the amount of anti diuretic hormone decreases as you get older so you are less aware of not drinking enough, frustrating I know!!

In the 90s, are you sure? There wasn’t any water fountain at my school, so we all brought our own big water bottles (in the massive Head sports bags that were in fashion then); and there were vending machines all around the school flogging drinks cans and water bottles! All the girls’ magazines went on and on about drinking 2L of water every day for your skin so you didn’t get spots. There was definitely a water bottle culture in the 90s. Some girls took to bringing water in giant 2L fizzy drink bottles wrapped up in plastic bags to keep it cool. And this was a Northern comprehensive in an area that wasn’t noted for being particularly fashion-forward 😆

Anyway, the poor OP’s relative doesn’t care about all that, sorry for derailing the thread!