How long does end of life last?

I sat with my DH for 7 days or more after end of life care was started. It was a slow business and it felt impossible that anyone could still be alive without water for so many days.

The nurses gave him an injection of midazolam every time he showed even a tiny sign of distress.

Sending love and support - it is a very hard time I know.

It’s an awful feeling, just waiting for them to die.

I know it probably feels like you lost them a while ago anyway but it’s still difficult.

Is she on a morphine pump? We found our dad passed shortly after the doctor’s visit.

So sorry to hear this, it's heart breaking. My Gran hung on for 7 days and decided going on my daughters birthday would mean we would never forget. That's tongue in cheek, we do laugh about it now although at the time I hadn't even realised the date til later in the day.

My grandfather was like that with the rattling breathing for 5 days - and chose the first moment in those 5 days when everyone happened to be out of the room to pass. The nurses told my dad it was incredibly common and not to be upset that he hadn't been with him at the precise moment after sitting there for 5 days at his bedside.

Sending love and strength and hope you have wonderful memories to look back on

My mum went for5 days after major bleed on the brain. Breathing was very laboured sometimes rattly throughout
On her last day she did have a slight blue tinge, especially around her eyes. That was my only sign of anything different.
Look after yourself

I'm sorry about your DM.

My mum died over Xmas. It looks about 4 days with no food or water and it sounds very similar to what you are currently experiencing. There are signs that death is coming nearer. Hands and feet get colder and there can be changes in skin tone. The carers may be able to make an educated guess about whether things are very close - although they will probably be very keen to say no-one can say for sure.

My DFiL lasted a few days with the rattle and on/off breathing.

My mum was end of life and we could see each day that she was deteriorating over the course of a week. Then on the Sunday we could hear the rattle as we went up to her room (she was in a care home) but her breathing was regular. She made one strange sound and then her breathing stopped although her heart kept going for half an hour or so.

My dad lasted for 16 days with no food or water after his stoke.

I'm so sorry you are going through this OP.

My mum was in a similar position (care home/dementia) She stopped swallowing on Saturday and died on Wednesday. I suspect you're close to the end now. On the last day, we noticed mum's colour slowly changed throughout the day. At the end, she took one huge breath then slipped away. I hope peace comes soon for all of you.

My dad lasted two weeks.. he was so strong to the end 😔
You sound like you're in the last 24h tho with that breathing. Thinking of you. Hold her tight as it's hard to believe it now bit when it's over, it's over. Look after yourself.

Sorry to hear this.
My grandmother lasted 7 days with no food or water. It was awful. Thinking of you x

Oh I'm so sorry to hear this. When I was with my grandmother she was in that stage for around one day. So I am so sorry that it seems so prolonged for your dear mum.

Sadly all that can be done is keep comfortable and pain free, practice mouth care, are the carers in the home helping or are you left to it? When I was with my grandma at those stages I was left to it myself and didn't have a clue what I was supposed to be doing, but I suppose it's just hold their hand speak to them and keep them comfortable,

I'm so sorry your going through this x