Looking for daily 'carer' but not for personal care?

Apply for this for your DM
It I'd not means tested
DM can spend it on anything to make her life easier

https://www.gov.uk/attendance-allowance

Another recommendation to apply for Attendance Allowance or Pension Age Disability Payment as it's becoming known
Not means tested and payable if any physical, cognitive issues that require support to any degree. The form is onerous but Age UK or Citizens Advice can help if needed

I organised this for a family friend. He had a local mum pop round late morning, cook lunch and eat it with him and do a few odd jobs and leave mid afternoon. It suited her really well as it fitted in easily with the school runs.

Nothing to do with your post but my Dad is at the same stage. I bought him a clock with the day and date on it in large letters.
He loves it and definitely uses it together with his list to see what he should be doing.

I can really relate to what you’re going through. My own mum wanted to stay independent at home, but I needed peace of mind knowing she was safe and supported. Sometimes just having someone pop in daily to check on meals, medication, and offer a bit of company makes all the difference. I’m in Nottingham and ended up going with Bridgegate Care for personal home care services. Their carers were reliable and kind, and it helped me feel reassured without taking away my mum’s independence.

I used to do a bit of emotional blackmail. 'Of course youre managing most of the time mum but honestly I'm tearing my hair out worrying about you. Would you just let them in and be nice to them, for my sake?...'

You could try Home Instead or similar.

Definitely apply for attendance allowance.

I would look at the home care services being offered but also have a Google for e.g. home help/housekeeping for older people. People round my way often advertise on e.g. the post office notice boards as well, so that might be worth looking at next time you're down?

In that case these might be able to point you in the direction of some appropriate care agencies, even though she wouldn't qualify for any financial assistance.

Adult Social Care | Brent Council

A decent carer will get around that
"Can I just make you a brew while I'm here? I need to fill in some paperwork that says you're fine and I'm gasping.."

Once you're inside then it's much easier to cast an eye over everything. I got someone to shower that hadn't for 3 years

I hope you find what you need @Giraffesdotty

My 95 year old mother needs exactly this. She already had a lovely caring cleaner who came once a week and who she has known for years, so we arranged for the cleaner to come twice a week and also to call in briefly most days just to check all is well.

It has made me a lot less anxious but I do worry about what comes next. My mother, like yours OP, can look after herself physically and is always immaculately dressed, but her short term memory is getting worse and worse. For example, she has a bracelet alarm in case she falls but when she did have a fall recently it didn't work because, although she had put it on the charger overnight, she had forgotten to plug the charger in!

Just to say, disability benefits are not means tested, so if she is not already getting Attendance Allowance, it sounds like she could be eligible.

My mum has carers from Helping Hands, and they just pop in once a day to check in her, have a cup of tea, and do any bits she can't manage. Think most care agencies would have a similar service.

Have you considered ageuk the have all sorts of services.

The person who cleans for me also offers this service. I don't need it at the moment, but she's mentioned some of "her ladies" ask for this. Sometimes it's just sitting outside the bathroom while they shower, sometimes it's helping them dress or feed pets. While I don't need that type of help at the moment, she has a key to my house in case, for example, I fall and can't get up.
So independent cleaners in your Mums area may offer similar. Mine has insurance and pays tax and NI, so I feel confident that she's capable.

Another recommendation for Home Instead. They are a franchise business so I guess might vary from area to area but we use them for my mum and two other friends have had good experiences in different areas so they seem to be uniformly good.

Contact her local social services. They will be able to do a care assessment and get her set up with an agency even if your mum funds it herself.

I can't recommend a particular company, but just to say this is a totally normal reason to have carers, exactly what one of my grandparents has. She manages to wash, dress and make her own meals but needs help around the home, medication, keeping on top of laundry. She doesn't need physical help, just support.

I think you need to give an idea of the location as many "national" names are franchises and may have different ways of working and reputation in different areas.

Home Instead (and probably others) offer a 'Companion Care' service, which sounds like the sort of thing you're after. You may need to ring round a few agencies to see who's actually got staff available.