Can we cancel charity direct debits? If so, how?

There are also these people to help get vulnerable people of charity contact lists:
https://fundraisingpreference.org.uk/home

But charities only voluntarily abide by their code.

We did the same as @DeliciousApples

Would he be capable of signing his name? Type a letter get him to sign it and pop it in a post box?

However do apply for guardianship or whatever it's called where you are. I think England, Scotland and NI have slightly different processes.

Who has refused? Name the bastards!

You need to get POA sorted asap

If he still has enough capacity to say (when asked) who he wants to look after his, then you should still be OK.

If this is not done, and he needs eg to move in to a care home, or you need new major outlay and possible means testing for LA support, you are going to be up shit creek without a paddle, and may need to apply to the Court Of Protection (which is a detailed application, with many stages, slow and very, very bureaucratic)

Yes, there are some short term work-arounds given on the thread.

But please also use the need to end most/all of his charity direct debits as the spur to get this properly sorted

As a longer term solution, you should apply to the Court of Protection to become his deputy. There is a lot of useful information and contacts here:

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/legal-financial/deputy-dementia#content-start

I access my DF's online banking and email account with his permission. I set it all up for him so I know all the log ons and passwords.

We both use the same bank, you could just set up a new email address for him and do it that way?

I have also pretended to be both of my parents on the phone at various times to sort out mobile phone problems. As long as you answer confidently, and can answer all the security questions, they just go along with it. I did wobble a bit at saying my name was Terence, it's not exactly a gender neutral name.

Not sure that would work on a bank though, you'd hope they'd do more checks.

When I've phoned for my elderly parent I say: "I'm here with my mum she wants help to sort out some direct debits please. Is it ok if I put her on she can give permission".

And then I put it on speaker. The woman says 'Mrs D A do you give permission to your daughter to discuss this with me'. I say to my parent 'say yes'. That gets said, and I get on with it.

Is he capable of doing that?

Not sure why it wouldn't work? My sis has MH issues so I set up an account online for her with same bank as I'm at. As long as you have their email / phone access you can do it. I then just have two sets of login details saved to my phone. (Please note my sis was with me when I did this and with full knowledge, she just struggles doing paperwork and organising things)

Get him fixed up with online banking, I did it for my dad during covid and was able to do all his banking admin for him. Very helpful in the run up to his death as well I might add when he was too ill and just told us to deal with everything.

Bottom line is you're acting in his best interests

Re PoA my understanding is that he just needs to understand it at a simple level. He doesn’t need to know who the prime minister is or what year it is, just that you are helping him and will be able to do things and make decisions on his behalf.

Talk to Age UK or similar.

Yes to third party access, but that requires your dad to give consent. Set up the online baking in your mums number and email and then you keep the password to log on with her and cancel it. But you need advice if he’s got no capacity now

You can use the same number as verification on the online banking - both mine and my husbands use the same contact number (this is nationwide).

Try a dementia charity for advice. But I would phone up each charity and say they took advantage of someone with dementia and the payments stop today or you’re escalating it.

As an aside, you need to seek Deputyship.

You might be able to get third-party access to his accounts?

I was doing this with Barclays but because they were so unbelievably slow my mother died long before it was set up. Other banks might be faster.

she didn’t have any cognitive impairment though.

I don’t think online banking would work because my email and phone number are registered to my own online account and I surely can’t have 2 registered to the same ones with the same bank?
Is it worth checking to see if the bank has a non-phone / OTP system e.g. a card-reader?

I’d register with his email address and telephone number, particularly given you work there, but that should work.

You can use the same number on more than one account with some banks, as my number is one of the online banking numbers for my husband and vice versa.

If you can get hold of his debit card you can just set up online banking, you will probably need access to his phone as well. As the will text security codes more than likely.

but going forward you need to have legal means to help him manage his finances if he doesn’t have the capacity

I emailed the charities for my MIL. As well as Direct debits, they sent her ‘one-off’ requests for specific events. She read them as bills ( I could understand why) and got herself upset trying to pay for them all.

I have a shit-list of the larger charities who act abominably towards their established donors, but that’s a whole other thread.

Definitely try the bank. They can be helpful and will be alert to people with dementia being taken advantage for this sort of thing, esp if you explain that it’s leaving him financially sort.

please please do sort POA if it isn’t too late for him to consent to this