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Elderly parents

End of life advice desperately needed

53 replies

Nodancingshoes · 30/07/2024 15:05

My grandmother is receiving end of life care in a nursing home following 3 weeks in hospital. She is 99 and my sister and I are NOK. Up until 18 months ago, she was fully independent. She has been in the home for 8 days now, no food in all this time and almost no water - she is just on mouth care now. She is almost completely unresponsive now although does seem to know briefly when we are there. If she does wake, she is very distressed. She has had a syringe driver for about 2 weeks. I know that it is impossible to predict but, in your own experiences, how long will it be until she passes? She is suffering and we are all in bits watching it happen. I keep my phone by my bed every night waiting for the call - I have even prayed for God to come and get her even though I am not in the least bit religious 😥I know no one has the answer but if you can share your own experiences I think it might help

OP posts:
Noshferatu · 30/07/2024 15:18

I think she is in the last part. My father was in that situation and it was two weeks. Bless her and bless you.

LizzieBennett73 · 30/07/2024 15:16

I worked in a nursing home and we had one patient last for 23 days with no fluids... the body shuts down very slowly for some. When my Dad had cancer, I think it was just under 2 weeks.

I'd question what they're giving in the syringe driver to be honest. They weren't giving my Dad enough Midazolam and once they got that right, he was so much more settled.

MumChp · 30/07/2024 15:09

Is she on any medicine?
Ask for morphine and sedative.

It shouldn't be long, but time is difficult to predict.
Condolences on your loss

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