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Elderly parents
Original poster

Hoarding mother sending 20 boxes of books!

66 replies

Toomanysquishmallows · 26/07/2024 15:48

Hi , hoping for a sympathetic ear . My 78 year old narcissist mum lived in a care home . She has cousins clearing her house . I live 70 miles away and have two children with autism. We live in a very small council flat . On Wednesday the cousins arrived and deposited 20 boxes of books and rubbish! I’m talking filthy kitchen scales and cheese graters . I know have an unusable living room . I spoke to my mum today , and she merely said I could wait for my brother who I barely see to collect the stuff. I’m currently in total despair at the state of my flat .

OP posts:
MattSmithsBowTie · 26/07/2024 16:56

Why did you let them bring it in? Don’t bother going through it or trying to sell it on unless she’s the type to have a Rolex watch she might have misplaced in a box of junk, just call the council and get them to collect it and take it to the tip (and then give your living room a really good clean afterwards, I’m assuming the old tat has that ‘charity shop smell’)

OldTinHat · 26/07/2024 16:35

You can sell second hand books via Ziffit or Music Magpie. They even collect them from you for free. I'd be tempted to do that and earn a £ or two.

As for the other stuff, put it in the bin!

Aquamarine1029 · 26/07/2024 16:15

Take a deep breath and get rid of all of it immediately and tell your mother you did so. They next time relatives show up with a mountain of shite, refuse to let them in.

Original poster
Toomanysquishmallows · 26/07/2024 16:12

@TheGirlattheBack , the greasy stuff went straight in the bin ! I have also binned about 20 boxes of photos .

OP posts:
TheGirlattheBack · 26/07/2024 16:11

Arrange for them to be collected by charity (I’d wash the greasy stuff first though)

Original poster
Toomanysquishmallows · 26/07/2024 16:08

Thank you so much for all your wonderful ideas . I should know my mum by now But her complete lack of concern over the clutter aspect was a new low .

OP posts:
joligood · 26/07/2024 16:05

Would a charity collect be able to collect and sell the books?

OMGsamesame · 26/07/2024 16:05

Oxfam or similar might collect the books. Or put the whole lot on freecycle/Olio/gumtree free for collection

Uricon2 · 26/07/2024 16:04

Some councils will arrange bulk collections for a fee OP. Please just get rid of it, for your own peace of mind.

FlipFlops4Me · 26/07/2024 16:03

Tip it all and if anyone gets stroppy point out it was a health and safety hazard given the sheer quantity of stuff, the fact that your flat is tiny, and your dc's need for a bit of space in the sitting room to play.

Original poster
Toomanysquishmallows · 26/07/2024 16:00

Thank you ! I don’t drive , so it will be a cab , dp is convinced we can drop it off a free libraries , but there is so much !

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 26/07/2024 15:58

I would have said no to whoever dropped it off.
Just take it to to the tip if you can or arrange someone else to, might cost a bit of money but better than have it clogging up your house

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 26/07/2024 15:56

@Violettateal is right, @Toomanysquishmallows - ditch it at once. You could sort through it, in case any of it is worth keeping, but is it likely that anything in there will be worth the time spent finding it and cleaning it? Worth it either financially or emotionally, I mean.

Soonenough · 26/07/2024 15:54

Take it all to the dump. Tell her it was too mouldy to do anything else.

Violettateal · 26/07/2024 15:53

Just take it to the tip🤷‍♀️

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