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Elderly parents
Original poster

Urgent - ethics around pain med for 93 yr old

111 replies

yesmen · 27/04/2024 14:19

Hi. Urgent help needed if anybody is around.

Mum is 93 and in her own home.

She is immobile, needing to be turned every two hours. she has two massive bedsore - one on each hip.

She is in pain all the time and a volcano of pain when we turn her.

At the moment she gets 5 mls of panadol liquid every four hours. In my opinion it is touching her pain.

I want to insist on morphine prescription. DB does not. He thinks it is unethical and may kill her.

I say it is about her comfort now.

He says it will hurry up the process and she has a right to the process.

Thoughts from anybody at all are gratefully read.

OP posts:
Curlywurlywurly · 27/04/2024 14:38

It wouldn’t necessarily need to be morphine, there are other options to help keep her comfortable.
It is unethical (and cruel) to leave her in that much pain. Contact 111 for advice, don’t leave her until the GP surgery opens tomorrow.

MumChp · 27/04/2024 14:38

I would talk to GP and go for morphine.
At her age it can costs a few days of life but not kill her.
Talk to GP how to take care of her the last days of life. Medication plan is a must and knowledge of how the days/nights can be. Can you get a nurse to visit Helping with the care then reaching terminal?

TraitorsGate · 27/04/2024 14:37

Ethically you can't leave someone in pain or deny them analgesia

nokidshere · 27/04/2024 14:36

I'd say she needs a syringe driver with morphine. It's not really about 'helping her along' but about her being as pain free and as comfortable as possible. Would your brother speak to a Dr with you about it?

TraitorsGate · 27/04/2024 14:31

Are the palliative team or nurses involved in her care. Is she on a pressure mattress so that she may not need turning so often. Her comfort and pain control is the priority, oramorph is very good, she needs a medical visit, being in pain stops you wanting to do anything, there's no need for her to be left in agony. Your brother is scared but she's 93, has pressure sores and will be miserable. Does anyone have health poa. Is mum able to express herself, if asked I'm sure she would prefer to be as pain free as possible.

Topseyt123 · 27/04/2024 14:27

I would agree with you. She's 93, it's about her comfort. Could she not have something like Oramorph a couple of times a day?

Could the doctor have a conversation with your brother? Your mother needs to be comfortable. There's no point in her life being made hell by pain. She could go downhill from that just as fast.

Babyroobs · 27/04/2024 14:26

Some morphine liquid given 20 mins before turning could really help. Likewise Buprenorphine patches or similar could be helpful. Speak to the GP or palliative team. It's totally unethical for someone to be in pain like this in their last months.

JaneIves · 27/04/2024 14:24

I'd go for stronger. She's in obvious pain.

Dying is a process, yes.
But pain can be controlled and managed, of which she also has every right to.

audweb · 27/04/2024 14:23

What a tough situation. I doubt it would speed anything up, but I would insist on stronger pain relief. She’s 93, and in agony. I agree with you that she deserves something stronger. I would chat with the drs involved to see what could be offered, and try to get them to explain to DB the important of proper pain relief.

PTSDBarbiegirl · 27/04/2024 14:23

I'm no expert but I'd agree with you, treating the most urgent feature is the priority, so pain medication. I don't know anything about nursing or care for elderly but I'd want my Mum pain free rather than in agony but unable to enjoy anything about the day.

heldinadream · 27/04/2024 14:21

I agree with you @yesmen . It's palliative care. Do you have any nurses or doctors visiting?
Sorry that you are having to cope with this. Flowers