SIL is 83 and her health, mobility and balance have been deteriorating steadily over the last few years. She has resisted any real interventions, just the bare minimum of adaptations.
She fell this week and spent 6 hours on the floor before the paramedics came to get her up. Now she's frightened of being alone and she's taken to ringing everyone in her address book and guilting them to coming over to fetch and carry for her, pressuring them to stay overnight. It's a flipping nightmare. DH (her brother) is her only local family so is being run ragged, guilted all the while she refuses to use the new electric recliner chair, the new accessible bed etc. etc.
She does have a carer but she's only supposed to pop in a few times a day and she's done nothing about any other care. She's off her head on meds half the time (including stashes of pills she's ferreted away which are years past their expiry date). She's shouting at everyone who doesn't jump to attention, including the doctor and DH. Her lovely kind neighbour has been in tears at the abuse she's had. I get that she's frightened but my god it's hard.
There's no LPOA or anything else in place that can enable people to make decisions in her best interest. Her children live far away, have their own lives and families and are doing their best. No real point to this post but just had to vent. We saw this coming years ago and have tried and tried to tackle it but she wouldn't listen.