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Elderly parents
Original poster

Mum's personality is changing ...worried

31 replies

Sonolanona · 30/12/2023 22:56

Mum is in her late 70s.. intelligent and funny, if a little judgemental. Lives alone (long divorced and my Dad died years ago)
She has become MUCH more anxious over the last couple of years... stresses over everything. Neurotic about her cat, convinced he can't cope if she is away overnight, that he's anxious .. reality is he is simply an old ,demanding cat, no different to most and he manages fine for one night with the neighbour feeding him.
But what is worrying me is she has become quite rude/offensive. She bitches about her few friends, she was horribly rude about my lovely autistic son back in the summer... to the point where DD2 , who was with us out having a meal , was shocked enough to tell my Mum that that was out of order.
She's with us for New year and she upset DD2 by completely ignoring her toddler, while fawning over the other toddler with us, didn't even greet DD2 or her dh, and just isn't herself.
Her memory seems fine and she seems to function fine day to day, but it's like her social filter has gone... and heaven forbid you dare say anything.

Is this the start of dementia? She doesn't seem depressed (often complains she's bored but does a fair few social activities) she's got a few health problems but nothing obviously dreadful, and I'm just worried about her; and miss my Mum as she was :(

OP posts:
herewegoroundtheblueberrybush · 30/12/2023 23:58

Agree that this is a symptom of dementia, sorry to say so but I think that's what you already think OP. Not much you can do if she won't go to the gp at this stage...?

Candleabra · 30/12/2023 23:55

I’m afraid this was a symptom of a rare form of dementia in my mum. Behaving very out of character, rude at times, selfish. Just generally not the nice person she had been before. No other cognitive impairments at first, though that changed over time.

lifestylechoice · 30/12/2023 23:54

Sounds a bit like my mother TbH! She's obsessed with her dog. Then on Christmas Day started going on about how annoying Myra Wilson is and how ridiculous we all were for liking 'cheesy American crap' like Miracle on 34th St.🙈

I don't think she's losing it tho, just old and grumpy!

fourelementary · 30/12/2023 23:51

Sadly personality changes can occur in older age… and if she won’t see the Dr there is little you can do. Whilst she is still of sound mind can you get her to arrange you to be POA?

Original poster
Sonolanona · 30/12/2023 23:49

No. I think she'd just be mightily offended and upset if I suggested it. She's under a couple of consultants for a long standing autoimmune condition and has regular general check ups as a result and she gets very annoyed about those.
She has become highly sensitive to anything she perceives as criticism. Cognitively she is still pretty sharp...I've no doubt she'd thrash me in a game of scrabble, but she's DIFFERENT.

OP posts:
Berl29 · 30/12/2023 22:59

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