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Elderly parents

I'm so angry

28 replies

denpark · 14/08/2023 03:20

The title says it all.
I'm furious and I have nowhere else to vent.
My dad is an absolute prick. He's turned into a horrible old man who is just awful to everyone. He has moments of fleeting niceness but he's just so nasty.
I've given up the majority of my time this summer to be with him and help sort out his house & he's so damn rude and ungrateful. Lots of comments about 'I didn't want you here' when he begged me to come and stay with him. Lots of anger after I do the jobs he asks me to do and then seems to be angry that I've done them.
It's exhausting.
He threatened to disinherit me after we had a conversation where I told him (very nicely) that I will help however I can to look after him in the future if he ever needs it. He just lost it and ranted at me.
I'm very very close to giving up as I can't do anything right, apparently.

OP posts:
denpark · 14/08/2023 09:29

Thank you fir both replying. He's always been unreasonable and difficult but he's hitting a new low which can be very hurtful. I don't think it's dementia (yet) but I think the being angry because he can't do things is part of it.

I'm doing a lot of grey rocking where I don't rise to his goading comments but it's so draining.

OP posts:
HorsePlatitudes · 14/08/2023 06:02

Dementia.

My dads an asshole, so I went the carer route and limited my visits and calls. I phone him once a week. I do the bare minimum for him but we are talking about a violent bully of a man.

only you can judge. If he’s always been reasonable I’d be wondering about his mental health/dementia.

loubieloo4 · 14/08/2023 05:56

He's embarrassed that he can't do these things himself any longer. He shouldn't talk to like that, walk away take a deep breath and count to ten!
Unless you think there could be a health issue?