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Elderly parents

How are you managing with an aging parent set in their ways and the energy crisis

29 replies

Whengcame · 24/09/2022 15:47

My mother is 69. For a mmthe past year I was thinking that she's going senile. There's things not quite right but still she's still herself. It's hard to pinpoint exactly. Then earlier this year I found some sort of a progression in that she had many items of my underwear amongst hers as if they were her own. To this day she still has many items of my underwear. I am plus size and a size 20 and a size 40 band size for bra. She's a size 12. I know in my heart and in my soul that this is the onset of dementia but I just don't have a diagnosis yet. I am on my own. My siblings live abroad. I discussed my concerns with our GP and the GP rang my mother asking her to come down for an appointment. I don't know what the outcome of that appointment was.

Currently my mother has no comprehension of the energy crisis and she doesn't want to understand it and she doesn't care about it. There's no want or need to conserve energy to save on the bills. Every single load load from her is 60 degree washes. It's happening now every day from her. If she doesn't have anything to wash she will freshen up clean stuff in the airing cupboard. There's no need for 60 degree washes. She doesn't care. She doesn't want to offset a high wash load with a lower one. We have a clothes line too and often when the weather allows it we dry outside but she uses the tumble dryer too every day. She likes to make sure the laundry is dry dry. Also she likes to warm her clothes every morning in the tumble dryer and also her pyjamas every night before bed by popping them into the tumble dryer.

My nerves are absolutely shot. I got up this morning and she had a laundry load already on and it was 60 degrees. If wasn't even towels or bedding. It was just her clothes. Her clothes are now drying on the line and now when she comes back from her walk she will probably put them in the dryer for an hour or so to make them extra dry.

OP posts:
DiaryofWimpyMumm · 24/09/2022 16:06

My aunt has the onset of dementia and it's hard because she exaggerates things too so it's difficult to see where her personality stops and the dementia takes over.

It must be incredibly difficult to live with

bilbodog · 24/09/2022 16:03

Could you unplug the tumble dryer and tell her its not working? I think dealing with someone in the early stages of dementia can be the hardest because even though you know its not her fault nothing has been diagnosed and others dont see anything wrong.

have you looked at the alzheimers website as the more you read up about dementia the easier it is to deal with.

wendy mitchell has early onset dementia and has written 2 books about it - the first one, ‘somebody i used to know’ is a very good account of how she changed and gives a real insight into some of the difficulties that affect those with dementia.

look after yourself.

Hotandbothereds · 24/09/2022 15:57

Do you live with her? Is that how your clothes have got mixed up? How do you know?

Can she afford the higher bills?

Does she pay her energy bills monthly or quarterly, do you know if she’s on top of them currently?

Whengcame · 24/09/2022 15:51

Many people associate dementia with a forgetfulness and it can be that but from what I read online it can show in other ways too and over time forgetfulness sets in.

I would put money on this being the onset of dementia with my mother. There's no doubt in my mind any more but nobody is listening to me because she's not going out and wandering and getting lost.l and doing other stuff that would be harmful to her and others.

OP posts:
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